


Benefits

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: AU, Aged up characters, Angst, Arguments, Eventual Happy Ending, Fluff, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Smut, Swearing, Volleyball, as the story progresses there will be A LOT of angst, but a major warning, slow burn?, what else do i tag it as?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-01
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-11 16:34:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 50,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7060546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuroo and Akaashi had an understanding. They weren’t together in any way, nor did either of them have feelings for the other; they just... relieved stress together, in more ways than one.<br/>Sure there was the odd time where Akaashi would help Kuroo out with work stuff, or vice versa, but most of the time was spent in bed, relieving a different kind of stress.<br/>But of course, it’s not that simple, and things can get complicated way too quickly for either of their liking, especially with an excitable and loud owl making matters worse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh! So this is probably the only story I've published that I'm really happy with. I've actually already written it all so you can expect frequent updates!  
> Also I am so inexperienced in writing smut and I am so sorry if it's bad, but yeah, smut right off the bat in the first chapter. Great way to hook readers, right?  
> I really hope you enjoy this, and let me know what you think!

It was a Monday. Everybody’s least favourite day of the week, unless you’re a workaholic who gets up at 6am every morning to head to the office before everybody else, that is.

Akaashi’s alarm went off at 7; he didn’t start until 9, so he liked to have a bit of time to himself before he had to start the day. A thin line of sunlight was shining its way through the small gap in the curtains, giving the room a warm glow. He sighed contently to himself, relaxing into the pillow and letting his eyes close slightly.

He re-opened his eyes, however, when he rubbed his neck. He must have slept on it weirdly, because it felt like he cricked it. But that wasn’t it. When he put his hand on his neck there was an unpleasant stinging feeling, one that he was actually getting quite familiar with recently. Thankfully, the bruise was low enough to be covered by his shirt collar.

Smiling to himself, Akaashi looked to his side. Kuroo was there, sleeping away with one arm lazily draped over Akaashi’s stomach. There was a small pool of drool on Akaashi’s pillow, he cared, but was so used to it he didn’t get annoyed in the same way.

He’d lost count of all the mornings he’d woken up next to Kuroo, either in his bed or his own. They’d had this ‘understanding’ for about 3 months now, and he didn’t regret any of it so far. They were just friends helping each other out, no feelings, nothing but a guilty pleasure.

Akaashi must’ve fallen asleep again without realising it, because soon enough he was awoken by an overly loud yawn and the bed moving slightly. He opened one eye to look at the time, he should be getting up now, and with a groan, he rolled over to watch Kuroo stand up and stretch.

Akaashi liked watching Kuroo stretch in the mornings. His back muscles working perfectly, his arms flexing. Not to mention it was made 100% better because Kuroo always slept shirtless. Akaashi let out a happy sigh as he watched Kuroo open the curtains, but he scrunched up his face as soon as the light hit him.

“Ah, morning...” Kuroo gave a lop-sided grin as he turned around and saw Akaashi’s face.

“You’re an asshole.” Akaashi grumbled, hiding his face from the sunlight.

Kuroo looked down at himself and smirked, “Yeah, but you like this asshole.”

Akaashi gave in and smiled, even let out a bit of a laugh, “It’s true.”

Kuroo clambered back onto the bed and crawled over to Akaashi; he poked his cheek and smiled down at him, “Sleep well? You were really stressed last night, I hope I helped.”

Akaashi rolled his eyes, “Shut up and get me breakfast.”

“How who’s being the asshole?” Kuroo looked offended, but Akaashi knew he was pretending, “And I don’t have time, and neither do you, really. You have to be at work in... an hour and I have to be at the gym in less than that.” He said, getting off the bed again and walking into the bathroom. “You know, if you want to save time you could just come shower with me.” He called from the sink.

Akaashi sighed, typical Kuroo to suggest that, but, he had no complaints, as he joined him not a minute after.   

\---

Work for Akaashi was stressful. It was full of people who were either too loud, annoying or didn’t know what the hell they were doing, and unfortunately, there was one of his co-workers who was all three of those things.

Akaashi had already taken some painkillers for the migraine that was brimming; he didn’t want to have to take anymore that day. He was sat at his desk pinching the bridge of his nose. There were three stacks of files and paperwork he had to sort through because a certain colleague of his didn’t know what to do with it and dumped it on him. He was pretty sure it was just so he’d get his attention, which was working, but for the wrong reasons.

He’d been paired up with a guy called Bokuto Koutarou for this particular task, and he wasn’t particularly thrilled about it. He worked for an advertising and marketing company, who usually worked with big companies in order to advertise their new companies. Akaashi liked what he did, he was actually pretty good at it as well, it’s just the experience was ruined by slackers.

“Akaashi!” Bokuto called, waltzing into the office and putting a takeaway cup of coffee on his desk, “I bought you this because you seemed stressed. Was it something I did?”

Akaashi’s nostrils were suddenly filled with the scent of coffee and he sighed, “Thank-you. And I’m stressed for more than one reason but your lack of organisation and teamwork is one of them, yes.”

Bokuto pouted, “What do you want me to do, then? I can help in any way!”

The coffee was still a little too hot, but Akaashi didn’t mind if it meant not talking to his guy for a moment longer. He swallowed the scalding liquid then carried on, “I’d like you to help me go through these. We’ve got to produce a billboard and magazine advert by next month and you haven’t helped me with any ideas yet. It’s not something we can get away with; it’s quite a big company we’re helping out.”

“Who is it?”

“Giorgio Armani.” Akaashi replied, carefully watching Bokuto’s face as his expression changed from curious to absolutely petrified.

“WHAT?!” He shrieked, “That’s such a big company what if we mess it up! There’s not enough time!”

“We got this assignment last month. We would’ve had enough time if you had just paid attention to me when we got it!” Akaashi said sternly.

Bokuto backed away, “O-oh...” he said quietly, “I’m sorry, really sorry.”

Akaashi blinked slowly, “It’s fine. We just need to work as hard as we can from here on out, okay?”

“OKAY!” Bokuto cheered.

This was going to be a long day.

Thankfully, Kuroo texted him soon after, so he’d get a little break from the chaos Bokuto was causing. _“Fancy coming round to mine for a takeaway tonight ;)”_

Like Akaashi was going to say no to that. He loved spending time with Kuroo, and the more time he spent with him, the more he liked him. He texted back a simple _“Sure.”_  
He envied Kuroo somewhat; he had a really easy job compared to him. Well, being a personal trainer wasn’t that easy, but at least he had people that he could work well with. Not to mention he had a great body thanks to all of it as well, which Akaashi appreciated sincerely.

Akaashi headed off to his lunch break; he usually just walked to the nearest convenience store and got a sandwich, then headed back to eat it either in the kitchen or at his desk. Unfortunately, he was interrupted half way through by Bokuto coming in, all happy and cheery and searching through the cupboards for something. In the end, he gave up and leant on the counter next to Akaashi.

“What?” Akaashi asked, looking to the side and seeing Bokuto beam up at him.

The question made Bokuto flinch a little, and he stood up properly, pressing the ends of his two index fingers together nervously, “I was thinking... After me being such a pain in the ass... I could take you out to dinner, as a kind of thanks for putting up with me, and a kind of sorry...?” he asked.

That was probably the 100th time Bokuto has asked him out since they started working together, and Akaashi had turned them all down. Not because there wasn’t anything unappealing about Bokuto, it’s just he wasn’t interested in him that way. (More like he didn’t want to lose Kuroo.)

“Bokuto I’ve told you, I haven’t got any spare time. I’m sorry.” He replied, not looking directly at Bokuto when he did. After last time, after seeing the sad expression on his face, he didn’t want to see him make that face again.

“R-right...” Bokuto stepped back, “It’s fine, I uh... Well, you see me practically every day, so let me know when you _have_ got spare time, ‘kay?”

“Yeah.” Akaashi nodded, “Will do.” Bokuto left the kitchen after that, and Akaashi sighed. Now, he was really looking forward to that takeaway.

\---

Akaashi didn’t have to knock on Kuroo’s door when he went to his apartment anymore, just like Kuroo didn’t have to knock on his. They said to each other that they could just walk in, or unlock it with the spare key, since they’re good friends and all.

When Akaashi arrived, he couldn’t be happier to smell the pizza wafting through the rooms. He knew Kuroo would order pizza; he always did, not that Akaashi minded though.

“Hey.” Akaashi said, walking into the kitchen and putting his coat on the hook.

Kuroo was getting a couple of plates out of the cupboard and he turned around and smiled, “Hey- wha- oh God, you looked stressed again.”

“Is it really that obvious?” Akaashi asked, accepting a plate and sitting at the table where the pizzas were.

“Akaashi I can see the wrinkles on your forehead already. You shouldn’t be getting wrinkles at 23!” Kuroo said, sitting opposite him and opening the box.

Akaashi took a slice and put it on his plate, “It’s this guy, he asked me out, _again!”_

“And you said no?” Kuroo asked with a mouthful of pizza.

“And I said no.” Akaashi clarified, “It drives me insane. It’s not that he’s bad to look at, it’s just I don’t like him like that, he’s... too overwhelming!”

“Well...” Kuroo took a sip of his beer, “He seems pretty serious about asking you out, so he must really like you. Maybe you’re not being straight with him enough.”

“Either that or he’s hoping I’ll magically change my mind.” Akaashi rolled his eyes.

They made idle small talk between mouthfuls of pizza, and eventually, the box was empty and their plates were in the sink. Akaashi was still sat down at the table, checking his notifications when Kuroo walked over and leant against the table.

“What?” Akaashi looked up.

“You know what I think?” Kuroo raised an eyebrow.

Akaashi locked his phone, “What do you think?”

“I think you have stress which needs to be relieved.” Kuroo purred.

“We had sex yesterday.” Akaashi replied.

“And you’re obviously stressed again. Either it’s because of a different reason to last night, or I didn’t fuck you hard enough to get rid of it.” Kuroo leaned in real close to Akaashi’s ear, and he could feel his hot breath on his neck, “So... do you think I should fuck you harder this time?”

Akaashi was such a sucker for Kuroo’s deep voice. There were times where he could use it casually and Akaashi would find himself crossing his legs uncomfortably. Of course, when Kuroo discovered this he would use it to his full advantages. Akaashi looked up at him, and saw that his eyes were full of hunger; he licked his lips and spoke in a low voice, “Do your worst.”

\---

“Fucking love your thighs, Akaashi.” Kuroo spoke deeply, dragging his hands over the expanse of Akaashi’s naked thighs. Akaashi spread his legs just a little bit wider so Kuroo could kneel in between them. “Fucking love marking them with bruises and bite marks.” To prove his point, Kuroo bit down on the skin, causing Akaashi to arch his back and let out a small gasp.

Kuroo started pressing kisses all up Akaashi’s legs to his hips, and sucked a deep purple bruise into his hipbone before kissing all around the area except the place Akaashi wanted his mouth the most, “K-Kuroo... please...”

“Aren’t we desperate today?” Kuroo smirked, his hot breath against Akaashi’s skin made his cock twitch. Without another word, Kuroo grabbed hold of Akaashi and smiled at the way Akaashi’s face scrunched with pleasure. His brows were furrowed, his eyes screwed shut and his mouth slightly open with a string of saliva hanging out.

Kuroo started with a steady rhythm, watching Akaashi’s face closely and taking in every expression he made. After a couple more pumps, Kuroo brought his mouth close to the tip, and looked up at Akaashi.

Akaashi was staring at him, as if to say _“do it, just do it right now or-”_ Kuroo stuck the tip of his tongue out and just pressed it to the head, making Akaashi’s eyes flutter shut and dig his fingers into the sheets, gripping them for support.

Kuroo gave a few experimental licks down the whole of it, before wrapping his lips around the head and giving a big, back arching, moan pulling suck. Akaashi’s hips jerked from the bed, only to be pushed back down firmly, a moan escaped from deep in his throat and that just spurred Kuroo on. He bobbed his head a couple of times, giving hard sucks every now and then.

Kuroo’s always been good at blowjobs, and getting one alone makes Akaashi feel like he’s not going to last long. But when Akaashi felt his dick hit the back of Kuroo’s throat, he felt his orgasm building up dangerously quickly. He forced open his eyes, and stared down as Kuroo deep throated him. When did he learn how to do _that?!_

“Y-you need to... ahhh... I’m gonna- K-Kuroo...” Akaashi panted, his hands were now twisted in Kuroo’s bed head, tugging at the dark strands like they were keeping him alive. It was a wonder why his hair hadn’t fallen out yet.

Kuroo pulled off his cock with a loud popping sound and placed a kiss to the tip, “Look at you.” He purred. His own boxers were painfully tight, so he quickly slipped out of them before moving on.

Akaashi started rolling his hips for more contact, and he wasn’t disappointed. Kuroo smirked and spread Akaashi’s legs wider, biting his thighs and leaving impressive marks.

“T-touch me.” Akaashi whined, shoving his hips back towards Kuroo, who just looked up at him and grinned.

Kuroo grabbed a pillow and slid it underneath Akaashi’s hips to give him a bit more height and so he was at the right level. Akaashi was about to ask what he was doing when he felt two hands pulls apart his cheeks and a warm, wet tongue prod at his hole. His moan made Kuroo’s cock twitch impatiently, and so he licked a couple of times before sticking just the tip in.

There was a bit of resistance that Kuroo had to work against, but the sound Akaashi made when he did was worth the work. Akaashi was tight, and warm, but Kuroo loved that, and he moved his tongue around, mapping out his walls.

It was a weird sensation; he’d never had somebody... do that to him before; they’d usually just used lube. After a couple of extra licks and sucks, Kuroo carefully slipped two fingers in next to his tongue, and felt his own arousal growing as a result of the moan Akaashi let out.

He began scissoring his fingers, all whilst sucking around his hole. He wanted to fuck him senseless but he still wanted to make sure he was fully prepped. With a smirk on his face, Kuroo curled his fingers and hit that spot which Akaashi choke out a broken moan and curl his toes into the sheets. “A-ah... hmm fuck, K-Kuroo...” Then he did it again, and Akaashi’s back arched off the bed. Kuroo brought his hand up to Akaashi’s cock and just gave it a bit of attention, but after noticing how much he was leaking, he decided he was ready.

Kuroo sat back and smiled at the mess he’d made out of Akaashi. His eyes were screwed shut, his hands twisting the sheets as he gripped them so tightly, and his stomach rising and falling quickly to match his breathing rate.

Akaashi opened his eyes, wondering why Kuroo wasn’t touching him, “W-what are you waiting for?”

Kuroo grinned and reached to the side for a condom. He slipped it on and spread some lube over it just for good measure, before aligning their hips. He leaned in and placed a kiss on Akaashi’s mouth, “Want me to rid you of the stress you’ve been keeping?”

Akaashi was staring up at him, his breathing was ragged and all he wanted was to forget the day ever happened, “Please.” He whispered.

Kuroo bit his bottom lip, sending a small smile in Akaashi’s direction before grabbing his legs and hoisting them around his waist. Akaashi dug his heels in and tried to take deep and calm breaths when he felt Kuroo press against his entrance.

Kuroo moved forward slowly, watching Akaashi carefully. His bottom lip was caught between his teeth as his breathing increased and his fingers gripped the sheets even more. “Tell me if you want me to stop, alright?” Kuroo said, running his hands down and over Akaashi’s stomach before coming to a stop at his hips. He lifted him ever so slightly to get a better angle, before giving one, quick, hard thrust.  
Akaashi shouted out, his back and head coming away from the bed for a moment, before flopping back down in somewhat defeat. He didn’t imagine being quite so stretched, with so little warning, but that was okay, because that’s what he wanted.

Kuroo waited for some sort of signal before he started moving, and boy when he started moving he really _moved._ It wasn’t slow and steady, like they’re used to, it was quick, uncontrolled and... _rough._

Every time Akaashi opened his mouth to moan, he could barely get a sound out because his breath caught in his throat and he was being gripped so tightly by the hips that he would surely have bruises that last for weeks. He didn’t have to do much work, because Kuroo was slamming his hips against his own, in an attempt to find that special spot.

Akaashi wasn’t expecting him to find it so quickly, but once he did his eyes shot open and this time he had no problem letting out a very deep, vibrating moan, from within his throat.

Kuroo was picking up the pace, relishing in the way he made Akaashi moan. His hair was sweaty, and was matted to his forehead disgustingly, but neither of them cared because it just felt _so good._ “Oh God... Ah- fuck Aka-ashi.” He reached out and starting jerking his cock, which was leaking profusely.

“I’m-” Akaashi stopped to groan, “I- I’m ahh... S-shit I’m gonna-” he gasped, feeling his prostate being hit dead on with each and every bone-shaking thrust.

“Hmm...” Kuroo hummed, “M-me too.”

Akaashi dug his heels in, got a tighter grip of Kuroo, and almost tore holes in the sheets. His face was scrunched with pleasure, head thrown back, and mouth open as his vision went white for a moment. It was, undeniably, the best orgasm of his life. He came all over his stomach, and up part of Kuroo’s.   
Kuroo was quick to follow, his nails creating crescent shapes in Akaashi’s hips as kept thrusting through it. He slowed down a moment later, breathing heavily and hunched over the bed.

Reluctantly, he slipped out and fell onto the bed next to Akaashi, who whimpered at the loss but was equally tired. They stayed there for a minute or so, breathing in unison with their eyes closed. Finally, Kuroo sighed, “Did... did that help you forget all about that Bokuto guy...?”

“W-what Bokuto guy?” Akaashi tried to grin, but he was honestly too tired.

Kuroo had a bit more energy, and managed to sit up and reach for some tissues to clean them both off, before collapsing once more and pulling the covers over him and Akaashi.

They were lying facing each other; Kuroo was already asleep, breathing calmly after regaining his breath. Akaashi watched him with a smile on his face, he looked so peaceful. Akaashi was less stressed now, Kuroo had been a big help, but he wished that Kuroo could help in more of a... a boyfriendy way rather than a fuck-buddy way.

After spending the next 3 minutes staring at a sleeping Kuroo, Akaashi rolled over and swore. _Damn it... I think things just got complicated._

_\---_

Akaashi woke up to the smell of bacon. He smiled and sat up, immediately feeling a dull ache in his muscles. Kuroo had really helped him out the night before, he felt 100% better. With a wince, Akaashi got out of Kuroo’s bed and headed to the kitchen. He smiled as he saw him standing by the hob, holding a pan with strips of bacon in it.

He slowly walked over and wrapped his arms around Kuroo’s waist, but when he felt him stiffen, he realised his mistake and pulled away. “I uh... S-sorry.”

Kuroo paused and looked over his shoulder, “What was that for?”

Akaashi fiddled with his fingers nervously, “Just a uh- thank-you for last night, I guess.”

“Oh.” Kuroo turned back to his bacon, “Well, you don’t need to make a habit of it, okay? It’s not like we’re going out, things like that aren’t necessary.”

Akaashi felt his heart drop a little. Of course he knew that they weren’t going out, but there was still that feeling in his stomach. “Right.”

If there was something that gave him away in his voice, Kuroo picked up on it, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah of course!” Akaashi replied, a little too quickly, as Kuroo raised an eyebrow, “Just thinking about the assignment I have to do, that’s all.”

With that, Akaashi left the room and into Kuroo’s room again. He picked up the clothes he discarded the night before and put them on quickly. He just wanted to be out of there.

Kuroo stood in the kitchen, staring at the door Akaashi had just walked out of. What just happened?

\---

“Sit.” Oikawa said, gesturing to the chair the other side of his desk, “You wanted to talk, yes?”

Akaashi swallowed and sat down, “Yes.” He replied, “But can this conversation be between friends, instead of co-workers?”

“Sure...” Oikawa said, relaxing a little in his seat, “So what’s up?”

Oikawa was technically Akaashi’s supervisor, but, they were friends before that. He usually went to him for help and advice, so he figured he was the best person to go to in this situation.

“Do you remember my friend Kuroo?” Akaashi asked cautiously.

“The guy that you brought to this year’s summer barbeque? Yeah.” The other replied, “What about him?”

“Well we...” Akaashi sighed, “We kind of have a thing.”

“A relationship? Awesome.”

Akaashi scrunched his face. That was exactly what he _wanted,_ but didn’t actually have. “Uh- more like an... understanding... you know like uh-”

Oikawa held up a hand, “Say no more.” He had a small smirk on his face, “I understand what you’re trying to say. So you’re... you know, but what’s the problem?”

“Well we went into it agreeing that neither of us had, or developed, feelings for the other and I kind of...”

“Did.” Oikawa finished, and Akaashi nodded, “Well I can understand that. I mean, that Kuroo guy is very attractive; I think that if I was in your situation I’d definitely have feelings for him as well.”

“Um.” Akaashi raised an eyebrow, “Don’t you have a boyfriend?”

Oikawa smiled, “Fiancé, actually.” He held up his left hand, and there on his finger was probably the nicest ring with the biggest diamond Akaashi had ever seen. He twirled his finger around, almost as if he was bragging.

Akaashi was staring at the ring as he said, “Congratulations.”

“It’s gorgeous, right? Must’ve cost a fortune, but, my Iwa-chan’s a super successful sportsman so, he can afford it.” Oikawa said, admiring the rock on his hand like he’d just seen it for the first time.

“You used to play as well, right?”

Oikawa nodded, a brief wash of sadness coming over him, “Yeah, before I got injured...” he sighed, then clapped his hands together, “Anyway! This isn’t why you’re here, uh, tell me more about your problem.”

\---

“Akaashi!!!”

Akaashi was sat as his desk, hunched over some designs and patterns for the adverts he’s making, when he jumped at the call of his name. He didn’t need to look up to know who it was. “What?” he said.

“I have some ideas for the billboard!” Bokuto ran up to his desk and dropped some papers on it. Akaashi sighed and picked them up. He scanned them carefully before putting them back down and looking up at Bokuto with raised eyebrows.

“Bokuto, these have owls all over them. Giorgio Armani isn’t about owls-”

“I know! But I was thinking we could incorporate them in some way.”

Akaashi pinched the bridge of his nose, “No.”

“But-”

“No.” Akaashi repeated.

Bokuto’s shoulders dropped and he collected his papers, and then walked back to his own desk slowly. Akaashi rolled his eyes and went back to his work; he had no time to pay attention to stupid and ridiculous ideas. He could hear Bokuto sulking to his side, but he blocked it out eventually.

When he looked up at the clock, he was grateful it was almost time to leave. He did enjoy his job, but still loved the time of day where he could go home and put his feet up. He wasn’t going to Kuroo’s that night, which he was also grateful.

He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to keep a smile on his face for the time that he was there without feeling incredibly nauseas over the fact that he had actually developed feelings for this guy, pretty serious ones too. Plus, he needed a shower.

So when he got home that’s what he did. The water was warm, and Akaashi was happy to just let it run over his body for a moment whilst he collected his thoughts of the day. Kuroo had definitely known something was up. He’d known him for years, they were really close, so it made sense that he’d pick it up. Whether or not he knew what it was, was a different case entirely.  Akaashi hoped he didn’t.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 is here! I really hope you guys enjoy it, and as usual if there are any mistakes that you notice please tell me so I can fix them because like I said last time, I can read it over a million times and still overlook something!

A month had passed. Akaashi had continued to get bugged by Bokuto about dates and the assignment, and he’d also continued to go back to Kuroo’s to relieve the stress of upcoming deadlines. That had been a mistake. Every time Akaashi spent the night at Kuroo’s, his feelings grew and he knew eventually, he wouldn’t be able to hide it anymore.

It was a week before the assignment _had_ to be in, and Akaashi was pretty happy with what he had designed. He did it without Bokuto’s help, after deciding his input wouldn’t be helpful at all.

He was sat at his desk, finalising things before he was going to go into Oikawa’s office and ask him to check it over, when Bokuto came into view. Akaashi looked up at him, “Yes?”

Bokuto pulled out an envelope and handed it to Akaashi, “These are your invites to this year’s Christmas party, it’s you and plus one...”

“Oh,” Akaashi looked at the envelope, “Thanks.” He took the invites out of it and inspected them. As usual, they were decorated nicely with various Christmas related things. He’d gone to all the office parties, he saw it as a good excuse to get drunk and then not come into work for a couple of days afterwards for ‘recovery.’

He saw his name and the words _“Plus One”_ written in italics and swallowed the lump in his throat, despite knowing it was probably a bad idea, of course he was going to give it to Kuroo.

“Also I have an idea for the advert-” Bokuto got cut off.

“It’s fine, I’ve put some stuff together already which I need to get checked.”

“Yeah but I think that-”

“ _It’s fine.”_ Akaashi said sternly.

He did it again. He made Bokuto sulk. It wasn’t his first intention, sure, it’s just Bokuto is incredibly annoying at times.

Akaashi looked over to where Bokuto was sadly pouring himself a mug of coffee and sighed. He stood up and walked over, before leaning on the counter next to him, “Listen, I’ve tried my best to work with you over this past month but honestly it’s getting ridiculous. We just don’t work well together, and I’m pretty sure this will be the last assignment we work on together. But, if there is one thing you can do which I won’t get annoyed at, it would be taking the ideas, mine _and_ yours, and putting them forward for Oikawa to send off... Can you do that?”

Bokuto looked up, “And mine?”

“Yeah, and yours.” Akaashi nodded.

Bokuto stood up straighter and smiled, “I can do that! Leave it to me!”

\---

(3 days later.)

“The Christmas party? Sure, I’ll go with you.” Kuroo grinned, “When is it exactly?”

“17th, you’ve got time to get an outfit, don’t worry.” Akaashi smirked.

Kuroo raised an eyebrow, “Yeah well I like to think that I look good whenever I go out, so I want a nice outfit to pick up guys with.”

Akaashi felt an odd twinge when Kuroo said that. To make it worse he was probably being serious, what was to stop him? It wasn’t like he was with anybody; he was as single as the next guy.

Well, if Kuroo was going to look good, Akaashi didn’t want to be upstaged. He had 15 days to get an outfit for the party, that was long enough right?

“Right well, I’ve got to get back to work, thanks for lunch.” Kuroo said standing up and picking up his phone.

“I paid last time!” Akaashi protested, setting down his cup on the table. Kuroo just gave him a small wave and then he left the cafe.

Typical. Akaashi was usually left with the bill, not that he minded much. He liked spending time with Kuroo which didn’t include sex, so it didn’t really matter.

The walk back to his office was nice, despite it being December, and Akaashi was thankful for the nice crisp breeze which was flowing through the sky. He liked walking around the city at lunchtime; it was always so lively and he liked the atmosphere.

When he got back to the office, Akaashi set his coat on the hook and carefully went back to his desk, making sure he didn’t bump into Bokuto. Thankfully, it seemed like he was still on his lunch-break.

“Akaashi, Oikawa wants to see you in his office.”

Akaashi turned around to face his colleague, Tsukishima Kei. He was taller than Akaashi, blond, and had glasses. He was nice enough once you got to know him, but the exterior would suggest otherwise. “Okay, thank-you.”

Akaashi stood up and headed to Oikawa’s office, he wasn’t sure what it was about, so he was nervous when he walked in and closed the door. Oikawa pointed at the chair, so he sat down and nervously fiddled with his fingers.

“Do you know why you’re here?” Oikawa asked, closing a file and putting it in the drawer next to him.

“No.”

Oikawa looked at him for a moment, as if trying to decide if he was lying or not, before raising an eyebrow. Akaashi fidgeted; normally Oikawa wasn’t this quiet unless something bad had happened. Akaashi quickly checked his hand, his ring was still there, which meant that nothing was wrong with him and Iwaizumi, so what else? What it is work? Was it the assignment..? _Oh. Oooh. The assignment._

Akaashi waited for him to comment. It probably wasn’t good enough, the company probably hated it and he was probably going to get fired and-

Oikawa sighed, and Akaashi didn’t like where this was going, “A few of days ago, Bokuto came to my office with a file, containing various designs and ideas for the adverts you’re producing...”

Akaashi swallowed, “I- I told him to, yes. I’d put together some things, and I think he did as well, the we combined them and-”

“I sent them off to Giorgio Armani after looking over them.”

Akaashi’s eyes widened. He’d just sent them off like that? Surely they needed improvement, or changes, or something?! “Y-you did?”

Oikawa nodded, still keeping eye contact, which made Akaashi very uneasy, “I got an email response today from the marketers.”

The younger closed his eyes; he didn’t need to be told they were bad. He knew his ideas weren’t up to scratch, he knew his job was on the line if he fucked up and-

“They were very impressed.”

What? _What?_

“I-impressed? I don’t understand..?” Akaashi’s mouth was open wide, but his eyes were wider. Did... Did Oikawa just say they were _impressed?_

Oikawa laughed, “ _You don’t understand?_ What’s not understandable? I sent away your file, they liked it, they want it, you did good.”

Akaashi blushed, Oikawa never usually complimented him that much, he rubbed the back of his neck, “Well I mean, I worked hard and-”

“Actually,” Oikawa cut him off, Akaashi looked at him with confusion, before closing his mouth so he could continue, “I have a question.”

“O-okay..?”

“Did you look at the designs Bokuto put forward?”

Akaashi felt his breath hitch for a moment, because _fuck,_ he didn’t even care about the designs Bokuto made, “No...”

Oikawa pressed his lips into a thin line and sighed, “I figured as such.” He said, “Otherwise you would’ve known I wasn’t talking about your work.”

“I-I’m sorry?” Damn it Akaashi had to stop stuttering. Although Oikawa was his friend, he had a hard time talking to him when it came to business. The guy was just so intimidating!

“They weren’t impressed with _your_ designs. They were impressed with _Bokuto’s.”_

Akaashi was silent. They... weren’t impressed with his work? But he tried his hardest, like always, what didn’t they like about it? “Oh...”

“Is that all you have to say?” Oikawa said sternly, he seemed really annoyed, “If you had just sent in your work then you would be in a lot of shit right now, hell, so would I as a matter of fact. Your work wasn’t as good as it’s been in the past, it was actually quite disappointing, but Bokuto? He saved your ass.”

Akaashi felt like a child getting scolded.

“He is an incredible advertisement designer, been recognised at his previous firms, done incredible work and you didn’t even have the courtesy to look at his portfolio.” Oikawa pressed, “They were so impressed they sent it to production straight away, they have the money and paid for it to be made as soon as possible, and the billboard is already done.” He stood up and walked to the window, he leaned on the wall and glanced outside, “Take a look for yourself what he was capable of. You thought for a second that he wasn’t going to be good enough so you wrote him off the moment you saw him without seeing what he’d done.”

Akaashi stood up and walked to the window. There was a billboard across the street which displayed a beautiful advert. The main colour was black, the Armani Code Perfume to the side with gold lettering forming the word _“Giorgio Armani”_ in a fancy font, with intricate details on the sides and corners. There was no denying it, this guy was good and Akaashi had seriously underestimated him.

“You keep on talking about teamwork, and how this guy can’t work in a team. Well, to be frank, I didn’t see any teamwork from you in this assignment.”

“Yes but-”

“Akaashi, you’re not getting another assignment until you can prove to me that you can be a team player as well, from what I recall he offered to help and you just brushed him off, not very teamworky, huh?”

“I can-”

“Get out, this conversation is over.” Nothing about Oikawa’s words was mean, it’s just they were... blank, like there was no emotion behind them, which made the man seem even more mysterious.

Akaashi took a sharp breath. He nodded and left the room, quietly closing the door behind him. He let out the breath he was holding and walked back to his desk. He slumped in his chair and leant on the surface. Bokuto was really good; he’d just written him off, what a jerk.

Coffee. He needed coffee.

Quickly getting up from his chair, Akaashi headed straight to the staff kitchen, but he abruptly stopped when he saw who else was in there.

“Akaashi!” Bokuto looked genuinely happy to see him, was he not mad?

“I’m so sorry!” Akaashi blurted.

Bokuto’s eyes widened and he took a step back, “What are you talking about?”

“I’m sorry, for underestimating you. You produced some fantastic designs and, hell, mine weren’t even used! And... Thank-you for, helping me out, but I’m sorry I wasn’t very supportive-”

“Akaashi let me stop you right there.” Bokuto interrupted, “You have nothing to be sorry for. You are such a talented advertiser, you’re created some really cool stuff, it was only natural for you to be annoyed that you were paired up with somebody new to this company.”

“But I didn’t even look at the previous stuff you’ve done! Aren’t you annoyed at that? I just disregarded you.”

Bokuto shook his head, “Believe it or not, I really enjoyed working with you, it was a honour, considering the stuff you’ve done.”

“You’re crazy.” Akaashi insisted.

“Can I... be even crazier?” Bokuto looked up at him, a small smile on his face.

“What?”

“Let’s go out tonight, let me take you to dinner.”

“Bokuto I-”

“Don’t have much time, right?” Bokuto replied, “Don’t think of it as a date. Think of it as two co-workers going out to dinner to celebrate the completion of an assignment. I also want to thank-you for being patient with me, I know I’m hard to work with sometimes, so please, let me buy you dinner.”

Akaashi stared at him. He was doing it again, asking him out, and although he told Akaashi not to think of it as a date, the younger knew for sure that Bokuto would be thinking of it as one. He thought about it, it was just dinner... But... but what about Kuroo?

Akaashi shook his head; what _about_ Kuroo? They weren’t dating, Kuroo made that pretty obvious that he didn’t want a relationship. So why shouldn’t he accept the offer to go out for dinner?

Akaashi forced himself to smile, as he was still pretty unsure about it, “Sure, I’d love to.”

Bokuto’s smile was blinding.

\---

They decided to leave the office together and head to a restaurant, just to make it a bit more casual instead of dressing up, at least that’s what Bokuto suggested.

Bokuto waited for Akaashi to clean up his stuff by the door, which he politely held open for him. Before Akaashi could walk through said door, though, he got a text.

He pulled out his phone and saw that it was from Kuroo, saying, _“Heyyy... So I had a pretty stressful day at work today, what do you say you come over and help me relieve it?”_

Akaashi raised an eyebrow at his phone, and looked up at Bokuto, who was stood there, beaming as he patiently waited for him. He looked so happy that they were going to dinner, genuinely happy, and that made Akaashi happy. So he gripped his phone and sent a quick text back, _“Jerk off then.”_

He wasn’t sure if it was too harsh, but he wanted to just go out and not think about Kuroo and the massive crush he had on him. Well, it was probably a lot more than just a crush, but still, he didn’t want to think about it any longer.

It was wrong, but he was using Bokuto as a distraction, and it was twice as wrong because Bokuto actually liked him, really _really_ liked him, so he was basically just taking advantage of that and using him.

He ignored the beep of his phone in his pocket, it was probably from Kuroo anyway, as he smiled and let Bokuto escort him out of the office.

\---

The meal was nice, they talked about work, their hobbies and interests and family life and by the end of it, Akaashi felt like he knew Bokuto a lot better, and he felt worse for not wanting to be friends with him in the first place. What made the evening better was the fact that Bokuto didn’t treat it like a date, he didn’t do anything cheesy, or try and be romantic, he was just... himself, friendly and funny.

“So...” Bokuto said, running his finger around the rim of his glass, “Tell me about yourself, likes, dislikes, the usual.”

Akaashi raised his eyebrows and took a sip of his lemonade, “Well, my favourite colour is orange. And despite what I said the other day, I do actually like owls.” Akaashi saw the sudden excitement in Bokuto’s eyes, but he kept quiet so he could continue, “I played volleyball in high school, I really like boiled rapeseed plants with karashi mustard dressing and I’m a Sagittarius.  My parents... my parents died in a car crash and... I have a sister who’s still in high school; she’s 17 and lives with our grandparents, although she comes to stay with me sometimes. Her name’s Rika.”

The excitement in Bokuto’s eyes was gone. Instead they were filled with sympathy and sadness, he looked up at Akaashi and tried to smile, “I played volleyball in high school too. I-I’m really sorry about your parents, and if your sister is anything like you I think we’d get along!”

Akaashi smiled back, “I think you will, I’ll have to see if she wants to meet you, she likes volleyball as well, was interested in it because I played it and she grew up with it.”

Bokuto laughed, “I’d like that!”

“What about you?” the younger asked, playing with the corner of his napkin, “What are your likes and dislikes?”

“I’m glad you asked, Akaashi!” Bokuto beamed, “Where to begin... Well, my favourite colour is blue. I LOVE owls and I’m so glad you like them too because they are an incredible bird and are so unappreciated!”

Akaashi smiled behind his hand, he liked Bokuto’s enthusiasm, “Also, the fact that I played volleyball too! That’s really cool! I _love_ yakiniku and I’m a... I think I’m a Virgo. My parents are still living in Tokyo, but I haven’t really spoken to them in a while, and I’m an only child.”

Akaashi was wrong about Bokuto. He was actually a very interesting, caring person, and Akaashi was now happy to call him his friend, and not just his co-worker.

As Bokuto had said, he paid for dinner, and they were then stood outside the restaurant, the dim yellow light illuminating them as they spoke.

Akaashi had planned to just say goodbye and go home, but Bokuto grabbed his hand and stopped him. “Akaashi...”

“Are you okay?”

“I just need to say this.”

“Okay...”

Bokuto was still holding his hand, but Akaashi made no attempt to make him let go. They were facing each other and Bokuto took a deep breath, “I know that you don’t feel the same, any probably won’t but I can’t let you go without knowing this.”

Akaashi didn’t say anything, so Bokuto carried on, “But I really like you. Probably more than I’ve ever liked anybody else and I... I would love for there to be a day where I am with you, and can call you my boyfriend and be more than just a co-worker and, this is probably going to freak you out, but I think I’m... What I’m trying to say is you’re the only person who’s really tolerated me, and I feel like you understand me and I- I.”

“Bokuto.”

“Yes?”

“You don’t have to say it.” Akaashi replied, he was thankful that the light from the restaurant was dim enough so Bokuto wouldn’t see the blush on his cheeks. “And I’m sorry but-”

“It’s okay.” Bokuto smiled weakly, “I figured as such anyway.” He said, “Even so, I really hope that we can be friends, best friends even! You’re great to be around and even if I can’t call you my boyfriend I would like it just as much to call you my friend!”

A huge wave of guilt washed over Akaashi. God if that didn’t make him feel awful what will? Although he didn’t say it, Bokuto was in love with him, and he had taken that to his advantage and used him as a distraction. Man he was an awful person.

“I’d like to be your friend as well.” Akaashi smiled.

Bokuto grinned back, “Can I, walk you home?”

“Of course.”

The weather was nice, despite being night time it was still fairly warm in the city. Akaashi hadn’t realised until a couple minutes after they started walking that they were still holding hands. He didn’t drop Bokuto’s hand immediately, but kind of pointed something out with the hand he was holding and just never claimed it again. He could practically feel Bokuto’s disappointment radiating off him.

“This is me.” Akaashi said, pointing to a small apartment complex.

Bokuto nodded as he looked at the building, “Alright, well, thanks for coming out with me.”

“Well thanks for inviting me.”

“I had a great time working with you on the assignment, and I hope we can work on future ones together.”

Akaashi wasn’t sure if he meant what he said, because it had been annoying to work with him but, “Yeah, me too.”

They stood there facing each other in silence for a second, before Bokuto stepped forward. He was looking Akaashi in the eye, and Akaashi felt the sudden impulse to step back when he heard Bokuto say, “Tell me to stop if you don’t like it.”

“What?”

He didn’t get a reply, instead, Bokuto just leaned in and Akaashi felt a set of warm, soft lips against his own. He was taken by surprise, but in no way did he pull away. There was a weird buzzing going through his body, one that was completely new to him.

He started kissing back, and actually liked it. He pressed a bit harder, and heard Bokuto gasp. In that time, he stuck his tongue into Bokuto’s mouth and intensified the kiss. Bokuto’s hands were on his back, pulling him closer, and he wrapped his hands around Bokuto’s neck. It probably would have gotten a lot more intense if Akaashi’s mind didn’t start screaming at him about how wrong this was.

Reluctantly, Akaashi pulled away, he was looking down, but could feel Bokuto’s eyes staring at him, “I uh... It would’ve been wrong to-”

“I know.” Bokuto replied quickly, and Akaashi just nodded, still looking down.

“Thank-you for walking me home.” The shorter said.

“Of course.” The older replied, “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” Akaashi said, and watched Bokuto turn around and start walking in the opposite direction. He swallowed, and felt a lump form in his throat. What was that? Why did he enjoy it so much? Did he like Bokuto, or was he just using it as another distraction? Whatever the reason, he couldn’t deny that it was a great kiss, and that there was a tingle left on his lips, like he could feel Bokuto still pressing against him.

As he watched his figure get smaller and smaller, Akaashi held his hand up to his lips, oh man was he in a mess.

He got his keys out of his pocket and walked to his apartment door; he unlocked it and closed the door behind him. Akaashi stepped out of his shoes and set his stuff down on the coffee table, before going to his room to change into something more comfortable.

When he sat down on the couch, he reached for his phone to check the message he had received earlier, and he had been right, it was from Kuroo, _“I’m offended Akaashi. You’ve never turned this dick down before.”_

He’d also received some others from him, _“Akaashi? Why aren’t you replying? Are you out somewhere?”_ and _“Are you okay?”_

As if he needs to tell Kuroo is whereabouts all the freaking time. He decides not to reply to any of them, if Kuroo was really that worried about him, he’d go to his house!

May have spoken to soon... Because as soon as Akaashi thought that, he doorbell rang. Akaashi sighed as he got up and looked through the peephole, and yes, there Kuroo was, fidgeting on the other side of the door.

Akaashi opened it and Kuroo walked straight in, wrapping his arms around Akaashi in a tight hug.

“K-Kuroo?”

“I was so worried! But I saw the light on and knew you were okay!” Kuroo replied, stepping back and closing the door behind himself.

“Why wouldn’t I be okay?”

“You weren’t replying to my texts, I didn’t know where you were.”

“I don’t have to tell you everything and where I am all the time. I was out at a... a works thing. I was fine, why were you worrying so much?” Akaashi was irritated Kuroo got so worried. Did he not think he could look after himself? Was that it?

“Well it’s just... you know, we’re friends, I wouldn’t want anything to happen, and it was odd because you always reply.” Kuroo shrugged.

Right. Friends. As good as it was while it lasted, the distraction Bokuto provided with him was now gone. And all he could think about what Kuroo, and how good he looked in that muscle tank...

“Well, thank-you for worrying, but I’m fine.” Akaashi replied, “Uhm...” he sighed, “Well I guess now you’re here you may as well crash on the couch.”

“Aw.” Kuroo stepped closer and was probably now only 3 inches away from Akaashi’s ear, “I don’t get to crash in your _bed?”_ he moved across and placed a kiss on Akaashi’s lips.

But Akaashi shook his head and pushed him away, annoyed at him, “Did you come here to make sure I was okay or did you come here for sex? Like I said in the text, if you have stress you need relieving go jerk off somewhere. I’m not in the mood.”

Kuroo looked shocked. Genuinely shocked, “Wha- no Akaashi of course I came here to make sure you were okay! I just... I don’t know, thought we could have a bit of fun...”

“Why?” Akaashi asked, “You’re not my boyfriend.”

Kuroo smirked, “ _I know.”_ He said, “Are you okay?”

“Top notch.” Akaashi said sarcastically, before sighing a moment later, “I’m sorry, I didn’t have the best of days...”

That was a lie, he had a pretty good day, despite being lectured by Oikawa, and dinner was so nice and Bokuto was so nice. But he was just not in the mood to be nice anymore, and he was getting angry at the fact that he felt like this but it was wrong because they were... _friends._

“Don’t worry about it. We all have bad days.” Kuroo smiled gently, “I’ll crash on the couch.”

Akaashi felt guilty, because actually he could do with some good sex about now, but there was no way he was just to give in like that after saying that. He’d give it a couple of days, probably.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *hides face* How was that? Was it okay? Please let me know what you thought, and look out for chapter 3, which should be up within the next couple of days or so! As always, comments, kudos etc are always appreciated. Thanks :3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This flows from last chapter, so the reasoning behind "In those couple days..." was because I left last chapter at "He'll give it a couple of days..." or something like that, so if it doesn't make sense that's why. 
> 
> Anyway I really hope you like this chapter, it kind of didn't focus too much around the whole Bokuaka and Kuroaka situation like it has been, and we see a bit more about Akaashi's past as a familiar face pays him a visit! Enjoy!

In those couple days, it was Akaashi’s birthday.

He woke up like it was any other day. He’d never been one for thinking a birthday meant you get special treatment, to Akaashi, it was just another day and this time you just happened to change a digit when you wrote down your age.

Of course, previous years, and being friends with Kuroo, meant you weren’t allowed to treat it like any other day. It had to be special, and you had to do something extravagant for it!

That’s why, when Akaashi was busy putting away his breakfast dishes, Kuroo burst into his apartment with a bag screaming, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”

Akaashi nearly dropped his bowl, but carefully placed it back in the cupboard, the turned around and scowled at Kuroo, “You nearly gave me a heart attack!”

Kuroo pouted and put the bag on the table, it fell over and Akaashi noticed a few gifts fall out, “I wanted to surprise you!”

Akaashi rolled his eyes, “Well you did, so well done.”

“Okay, okay... I’m sorry! But come sit down, you need to open some of these things!”

“Kuroo I have to be at work in-”

“It won’t take long! Please!” Kuroo begged, “You need to open them _before_ you leave, trust me, you’ll want to.”

Akaashi raised an eyebrow, “Alright.” He said, slowly walking over to the couch and sitting down next to Kuroo. Kuroo started putting things in front of him. It wasn’t much, but Akaashi didn’t expect much for his birthday, he appreciated the thought more than the quantity of presents.

They were all badly wrapped, but Akaashi smiled when he pictured Kuroo struggling with the tape and paper. The first gift was a set of owl coasters, which Kuroo was unsure of at the store but decided it was perfect! The second was a t-shirt, just a plain navy one which Kuroo said brought out the teal in Akaashi’s eyes; he blushed at that. Damn Kuroo making him blush so effortlessly.

The next was probably the best gift Akaashi’s ever gotten, from _anybody._ And he’s gotten some pretty cool stuff in the past. It was just an envelope, and Akaashi was a bit sceptical when he started to tear into it. He could see Kuroo fidgeting in his peripheral from excitement, and a smile crept across his face.

To Akaashi’s surprise, it wasn’t a card, but more like a... a document?

“What is this?” Akaashi asked, trying to figure out what the hell Kuroo had given him.

“Open it up and read it!” Kuroo insisted, “See for yourself!”

Akaashi gave him a questioning look before unfolding the paper. It appeared to be a photocopy of something, as it was black and white and the quality wasn’t that great. It looked to be a plane ticket of some sort, and Akaashi squinted at the lettering.

“This has today’s date on it.” Akaashi said, “Have you booked me a flight or something?”

“Nope.” Kuroo almost looked happy he said that, actually he just looked _really_ happy. “Read the rest of it.”

Akaashi sighed; he really didn’t understand why Kuroo had given him this. The flight was meant to be coming in at lunch time, and was actually dead in the middle of Akaashi’s lunch hour. Akaashi looked to the ticket holder’s name, as he figured that would give him the best understanding of what was going on.

But, his eyes widened as he read the print. _Akaashi Rika._

Akaashi slapped a hand over his mouth, and looked up at Kuroo, tears pricking at his eyes. He hadn’t seen Rika in over 6 months, due to her being busy at school and such, and the fact that she’s in her final year does add to her schedule a lot.

“Happy Birthday, man.” Kuroo grinned.

“I-I can’t believe you did this!” Akaashi cried; he blinked a little to clear his vision.

Kuroo smirked, “Come on, you haven’t seen her in forever, you deserve to see your lil’ sis.”

Akaashi couldn’t help himself, and maybe it was a little too much considering they _weren’t_ going out, but they were friends and hell, they were _fucking_ so what does it matter? He launched forward and wrapped his arms around Kuroo, shoving his head in the crook of his neck and said “Thank-you.” Over and over again.

Kuroo laughed in his ear, and for a moment Akaashi thought that he might be uncomfortable, but relaxed when he felt Kuroo wrap his arms around him as well and say, “You’re welcome!”

\---

Akaashi was glad that not many people at the office knew when his birthday was; he didn’t want to have to deal with everybody coming up to him or giving him things which he’d then struggle to take home. Oikawa was the only one who knew, as far as he was aware, so unless Oikawa told anybody, he’d only have to accept one birthday wish at work.

Unfortunately, he shouldn’t have thought Oikawa would be able to keep his mouth shut about anything, and when he got to the office, about 22 people passed him wishing him a good day, and all the usual birthday stuff. To all of them he just gave a friendly nod and a thank-you.

Oikawa was standing by his desk when he got there. He was arranging something on top of it, like a gift bag or something. He didn’t appear to notice Akaashi until he cleared his throat.

“Oh!” Oikawa gasped, spinning around and holding his hands behind his desk, “I wasn’t expecting you so early! Um- Happy Birthday!” he said, gesturing to the desk. Akaashi’s eyes trailed over the gift bag, trying to figure out what it was.

“Thank-you, Oikawa, and thanks for telling everybody in the office, by the way.”

“What?” Oikawa asked, “I didn’t.”

Akaashi frowned and stepped closer to his desk to put his bag down, he looked over the top of the bag curiously, “Then why is everybody saying ‘Happy Birthday’ to me?”

“I have no idea.” Oikawa shrugged, “Oh! This is from me and Iwa-chan! Open it, open it!”

Akaashi was still confused, but opened the bag further and pulled out a bottle of wine, one Oikawa knew Akaashi _loved._ There was also a gift voucher to one of the clothing stores Akaashi really liked. “Thank-you.” Akaashi smiled, and Oikawa beamed.

Fortunately, the mystery of how it got around that it was Akaashi’s birthday was quickly revealed as Bokuto burst into the room, looking around frantically until his eyes landed on Akaashi. He ran over and grabbed his shoulders, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY AKAASHI!”

Akaashi knew he was going red, everybody was looking at him, and he could practically hear Oikawa’s smirk behind him.

“T-thank-you.” Akaashi managed to get out.

“I got you something!” Bokuto had lowered his voice, but it was still loud. He released his grip on Akaashi’s shoulders and pulled something out of the bag he had hung over one arm.

“You- you _did?”_ Akaashi couldn’t quite believe that not only Bokuto had gone to the trouble of finding out when his birthday was, but he actually got him a present as well. But it made his brain fuzzy, so to speak.

“Yeah!” Bokuto said, handing Akaashi a small box wrapped with grey and blue paper.

Akaashi was thankful that the attention he had gathered was gone as he picked at the paper. Bokuto was watching excitedly, and it reminded him of how Kuroo acted as well.

It was an owl shaped pencil sharpener, complete with details such as feathers, eyes and all that. Akaashi smiled, which made Bokuto’s smile wider. “I figured you could put it on your desk and use it when you’re designing things! Because you know, a sharpener is one of those things which people always need but never have.”

“I can actually relate to that.” Oikawa said, poking his head round Akaashi and in between them, “It happens all the time at home. Iwa-chan gets so mad.”

Bokuto laughed and Akaashi kept smiling.

\---

“Soooo...” Oikawa sang.

Akaashi looked at him out of the corner of his eye. They were in the office kitchen, leaning against the counters whilst their coffees were brewing. Akaashi didn’t like the way Oikawa was looking at him, he never liked that look. “What?”

“What did Kuroo get you?”

Akaashi turned to him fully, whilst still fiddling with the stirring stick he had at the ready for his coffee, “Coasters and a t-shirt.”

Oikawa must have noticed the way Akaashi’s face was reddening, as he smirked, “Yeah right, that wasn’t all he got you, was it? He probably got you something which made you like him even more or whatever, am I right?”

Akaashi sighed. He hated giving Oikawa what he wanted, but he was at a wall, so he nodded. “He bought my sister plane tickets so she could come visit me, her flight lands at lunch time.”

Oikawa whistled, “Damn. That’s what hell of a gift. So what’s the problem?”

Akaashi looked at him. Did he really just ask that? Didn’t he already know? “Seriously?” Akaashi raised an eyebrow, “He just... It’s not something you just do for a friend, and yeah you can say we’re a little more than friends, but he’s made it pretty clear that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me, he doesn’t even have feelings for me like that.”

“I suppose...” Oikawa started, “That is a pretty special thing for a friend, but... yeah, you’re more than that, you’ve been friends for ages, which by the way, is totally unfair because I’ve also known you for ages and I’ve never really hung out with this Kuroo guy! What’s that about?!”

“Can we focus on the more important thing please? And relax; he’ll be at the Christmas party.” Akaashi sighed. “Alright... Well, what’s the most, I don’t know, sentimental thing Iwaizumi’s ever gotten you for your birthday?”

The coffee machine beeped and Oikawa scoffed as he went to retrieve his drink, “Are you kidding? My engagement ring, of course!”

“Other than that?” Akaashi rolled his eyes.

“Oh...” Oikawa stopped to think, mid way through adding sweetener, “He booked us a holiday to Fiji last year.”

Akaashi’s eyes widened, “Really?!”

“He’s _very_ successful.” Oikawa bragged. Oh if Akaashi had a penny for every time Oikawa had said that. “But, either way, it’s different, because we’re in a relationship.”

“I suppose.” Akaashi relaxed against the counter a little more in defeat, and Oikawa handed him his coffee.

Some days he thought Kuroo liked him back, but considered previous things and then decided he gave up on thinking that. Was Kuroo just leading him on? Or was he just so fucking smooth he didn’t even realise what he was doing to poor Akaashi’s heart.

Then there was Bokuto, and Akaashi wasn’t even sure if he fitted into the equation, but he must do, right? It was a love-triangle of sorts, Bokuto liked Akaashi, and Akaashi liked Kuroo, but as far as anybody knew, Kuroo didn’t like Bokuto.

There was somebody who would do anything to be in a relationship with him, as already pretty much confessed and would probably be an incredible boyfriend, but no, Akaashi wanted to go after the one guy who actually told him that he wasn’t interested. Nice one.

“Oh hey, what time did you say Rika’s flight was?” Oikawa piped up.

“Lunch time.” Akaashi mumbled back, idly stirring his coffee.

Oikawa cleared his throat, “You better get going then. It’s almost 12!”

“What?!” Akaashi almost shouted, he quickly grabbed a lid for his coffee cup and grabbed his stuff from his desk, when he walked back past the kitchen Oikawa stopped him.

“Hey, take the rest of the day. You don’t have anything to do here anyway. Have fun!” he winked.

Akaashi smiled, “Thank-you.”

\---

Akaashi were nervously standing outside the arrivals gate. Why the hell was he nervous? This was his _sister_ for God’s sake, they grew up together. Well, actually, that was a lie. Being 7 years apart did really have an effect on both of them. They weren’t very close when they were younger, due to the age gap, they didn’t really have the same hobbies. But, when Akaashi started playing volleyball, Rika looked up to him and therefore gained an interest in the sport as well, and has been playing it ever since. After their parents’ death which was when Akaashi was 17 and Rika was 10, they got a lot closer, and it stayed that way, so now they’re pretty close, except the distance is a big issue.

People started coming through the gate and Akaashi stood up on his tiptoes to see over the sea of people in the way. He saw people come through to be immediately greeted with others, all in warm embraces, kisses and cries, and Akaashi almost felt envious.

There was one man who came through, who presumably had been on a business trip, who knelt down as soon as he arrived to catch his son, who ran straight into his arms. Akaashi smiled at them, they looked happy.

Suddenly, a flick of dark hair and a bright smile caught Akaashi’s attention and he turned to the side, his eyes landing on his sister.

“Keiji!” She cried, running over, albeit struggling to with the suitcase she was dragging behind her.

Akaashi grinned widely and pulled her in for a hug, “Hey Rika!”

Rika stepped back, “Happy Birthday, by the way!” she smiled.

“Thanks, this is probably the best present I’ve ever gotten.” Akaashi replied, grabbing Rika’s suitcase and leading the way, “I thought we could get a takeaway for dinner later on.”

“Sounds great.” Rika replied, linking arms with her brother and walking with a bounce in her step. Akaashi liked this, he missed her.

\---

“I haven’t sorted out the spare room yet, so if you want to just leave your stuff here and I’ll go do it now.” Akaashi said, holding the door open for his sister to enter his apartment.

“It looks exactly the same as when I was last here.” Rika said, putting down her suitcase and handbag. “Don’t you want to change it a bit? It’s looking a little tired.”

Akaashi raised an eyebrow at her, “Aren’t we the expert in interior design. How about we go out tomorrow, it’s a Saturday so I won’t have work.”

Rika nodded, “Sounds good. You can make up for all those birthdays you missed.” She teased.

Akaashi smiled and headed into the spare bedroom. It wasn’t much, but Rika was only staying for a couple of days so it would have to do. He just straightened up the duvet cover, the pillows and cleared out some of the space in the closet, it was usually just where he put things he didn’t have a place for.

“Alright, make yourself at-” Akaashi stopped just inside the living room, staring as his sister had swung her legs over the arm and had laid out across the whole of the couch, propped herself up on her elbow flicking through TV channels, “I was going to say make yourself at home but it looks like you’ve already done that.”

Rika laughed and selected a channel, “Well what did you expect?”

“Point made.” Akaashi nodded, “Are you hungry or anything?”

“Nah... Actually there was something I wanted to talk to you about.”

“Oh?” Akaashi moved to sit down on the other couch, “What’s up?”

Akaashi wasn’t used to really discussing things with his sister, most of that was due to the distance between them, but mainly it was because he was pretty sure she talked to her friends about most things, and sometimes it can be awkward to talk to an older brother about personal matters. Rika muted the TV and sat up straighter, legs crossed, nervously playing with the hem of her shirt, “You’re a guy, right?”

Akaashi looked down at himself, “Last time I checked.”

“And you’ve been in relationships before, yeah?”

Akaashi nodded, “Yes, what’s this about?”

“Just that...” Rika shrugged, “There’s this guy at school, and I really like him, and you know, some days I think that he likes me back, but then other days he brushes me off and I don’t know whether he’s leading me on or just that dense.”

Oh that sounded too familiar. Akaashi blinked, “Well... are you friends with this guy?”

“I’d like to think that I am, but honestly it’s a mystery.”

Akaashi sighed. Really, he should have something he should tell her, but considering that he’s going through the same thing, he’s at a loss. “You know what, you’re 17, and honestly, you should be concentrating on your school work more than getting a boyfriend.”

Rika rolled her eyes, “You sound like Grandma.”

“I’m serious.” Akaashi said, “I didn’t have a relationship until I was 20. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“I guess.” Rika scratched the back of her neck, “It’s just I feel pressured to get a boyfriend, you know? Almost every girl at school has one and then I’m stuck there as a single pringle and it sucks. I’m always third wheeling, but friends always go out on double dates and I’m stuck at home watching Netflix in the dark with a blanket wrapped round me. How sad is that?”

Akaashi closed his eyes, “I get it, it’s hard to be a teenager, I’ve been through it too, right?” he blinked a couple of times, “But really, it’s not the end of the world if you miss a double date, or feel a little awkward when you hang out with your friends. And this guy you like? Don’t bother doing anything about it unless you have a clear sign that he likes you as well, there is no point getting hurt if the guy isn’t worth it.”

Rika nodded sadly, and Akaashi felt a little pang of guilt. Really, he was giving advice to his little sister about this and he should be listening to his own advice. Kuroo was the same as this mystery guy Rika liked, except there was an added complication in Akaashi’s equation. Bokuto.

Just then, the door opened and Kuroo came in, sporting a sideways snapback and baseball jacket, Akaashi raised his eyebrows as Kuroo said, “You guys have no idea how cool baseball is!” he said, “There was a local game at the park and I got this cool stuff!”

“Aren’t you supposed to be at work?” Akaashi said, leaning over the couch.

“Day off buddy.” Kuroo saluted him, and then he looked over at Rika, “Hey, kiddo.” He said, walking over and ruffling the younger’s hair.

“Hey pain in the ass.” Rika smirked. Kuroo looked mock offended, raising a hand to his heart and sniffing.

“You wound me, Rika.” He said, “And Akaashi you shouldn’t be teaching your little brat over here this, I’m the cool one, she can’t think otherwise.”

Rika scoffed and Akaashi rolled his eyes, getting up and walking to the kitchen, “Alright, pain in the ass.”

Akaashi passed Kuroo when he walked, and Kuroo took it as an opportunity to whisper in his ear, “I’ll be the pain in your ass later tonight.”

Akaashi elbowed him in the side and Kuroo winced, holding his side and stumbling over to the couch Rika was sat on. They started having a conversation and Akaashi watched from the kitchen as he poured himself a drink.

 “What was that about?” Rika asked.

Kuroo shook his head, “You’re too young to understand, kiddo.”

Rika just raised her eyebrows.

When Akaashi walked back into the living room, Rika and Kuroo were on the couch chatting away like they were best friends, which was kind of true, because they got on incredibly well. Akaashi sat on the other couch, watching them talk whilst he sipped at his drink.

\---

“What do you want to order?” Akaashi shouted into the living room from the hall.

“Pizza!”

“I would kill for a Chinese right now!”

“No way!” Kuroo argued, “Pizza tops everything.”

Rika scoffed, “I beg to differ!”

Akaashi rolled his eyes, “I guess I’ll decide then.” He muttered, dialling the number for the takeaway.

Rika was happy with Akaashi’s decision, and was grinning smugly at Kuroo when Akaashi told them what he ordered.

“This isn’t fair, how come you picked her side?”

“Because it was clearly the better side!” Rika argued.

“Because I actually quite fancied a Chinese myself, Kuroo.” Akaashi replied, putting the phone on the coffee table and getting some plates ready, “It should be here in about 15 minutes. You can find a movie to watch on TV or something.”

\---

The order did actually arrive in 15 minutes. Rika shot up happy, watching eagerly as Akaashi stood up and headed out to the front door. But when he opened it, it was not the delivery guy he was expecting.

He stood there nervously, holding out the bag in front of him with a smile on his face. Akaashi stared back, confused as to why he was there. “B-Bokuto?”

Panic started to set in. Oh God. Oh _God!_ Kuroo was in the next room, the Kuroo which Akaashi had a huge crush on, and there was also his sister who would get incredibly curious as to why this guy had just turned up if he wasn’t actually a delivery guy. Then there was Bokuto, and if Bokuto saw Kuroo, then he would surely start asking questions, assume they were together and probably be really heartbroken that Akaashi let him kiss him when he already had a boyfriend. Of course, Kuroo wasn’t actually his boyfriend, but Bokuto wouldn’t know that.

“Akaashi? What’s taking so long?” A voice called from the living room. Kuroo’s voice and Akaashi could see the confusion on Bokuto’s face. Suddenly, Kuroo stepped out into the hall, hesitated a bit before walking up behind Akaashi and draping an arm around his shoulders. Akaashi felt his face heat up, and Bokuto just looked confused, but there was a bit of disappointment there as well. “Who’s this guy?”

Akaashi was just staring forward, he couldn’t look at Bokuto and he couldn’t look back at Kuroo in fear that he’d be looking at _him_ for answers he didn’t know.

Then Bokuto spoke up, nervously and quietly, “J-just a... the delivery guy, of course! Uh- Chinese?”

Kuroo grinned and took the bag, “Yeah, man, cheers.” He said, handing over some cash before closing the door, his arm still around Akaashi’s shoulders as he did. The last thing Akaashi saw was Bokuto’s shell shocked face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Personally, I can related to Rika's character so much, and I feel like I based part of her from myself. Anyway, I hope you like her character as well, and enjoyed reading this chapter. As always, please let me know if there are mistakes, and look out for the next update! :3


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geh! I wasn't sure about this chapter, especially with the first scene, like I don't know if it's weird or not but, it's not like she's a 10 year old or anything, but still idk, let me know what you think, because I am really inexperienced with writing things like that and I just kinda got too into it and yeah... 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

What’s the one thing you shouldn’t do with the _friend_ that you’re in love with? Have sexy time with him.

But of course, Akaashi does it anyway.

He felt incredibly guilty after seeing Bokuto outside his apartment like that. Really, _really_ guilty and although he shouldn’t have, because there was no relationship between him and Kuroo, the look on his co-workers face was just stomach twistingly sad and painful to look at, well for Akaashi anyway.

After eating their takeaway, the three of them just sat around talking before Rika decided to hit the hay, saying that the flight over was tiring and she needed some sleep, and of course, Kuroo didn’t forget the comment he made earlier.

“Rika is literally a wall away.” Akaashi whispered, trying to get his point across but made no objection when Kuroo’s hand made its way into the hem of his jeans.

“She’s probably already asleep, come on, you’re telling me you don’t want birthday sex?” Kuroo smirked, hand dipping a little further.

Akaashi looked over at the closed bedroom door. Kuroo had a point, she probably already was asleep, and Rika is one hell of a heavy sleeper. He bit his lip and looked down at Kuroo, he was already straddling his lap, so what’s the problem with taking it a little further, “We _have_ to be quiet? Alright?”

Kuroo did that thing with his face which Akaashi loved, sticking his tongue out ever so slightly to wet his lips, and started fiddling with his button and zipper, and Akaashi undid his. “Of course.”

Akaashi really wanted to forget the look on Bokuto’s face, and what better way to do that than to fuck it away? Of course, Akaashi told Kuroo that there would be no actual sex that night due to the fact that he was out of condoms, but that didn’t stop them from having a good old mess about.

Both pairs of jeans were halfway down their hips, boxers down and dicks in Kuroo’s large hand. Akaashi was slowly rocking against Kuroo, lip caught between his teeth in the hope it might stifle at least _some_ of his moans. Kuroo on the other hand was surprisingly good at keeping quiet when he needed to, and was only letting small gasps and hiccups escape.

Akaashi’s hands were braced on the back of the couch either side of Kuroo’s head, and one of Kuroo’s hands kept him steady whilst the other jerked them off.

Akaashi leant in and started sucking at Kuroo’s neck, and Kuroo’s hips jerked upwards, making Akaashi moan. Kuroo smirked before whispering in Akaashi’s ear, “I thought you were meant to stay quiet?”

Kuroo spoke deeply, and Akaashi bit down as a way to tell him to shut up. Kuroo moaned quietly and began rocking his hips upwards and against Akaashi’s.  
They were both getting incredibly close now, what with hot skin against hot skin, the faint sound of panting and gasping filling the air, and the purple bruises now littering Kuroo’s neck and chest. Akaashi knew it was wrong, because Kuroo was a friend, but in some way it was just so right and he couldn’t get enough of it, he _loved_ him, he really did.

\---

 Kuroo left after cleaning up, and Akaashi was lying on the couch, absolutely exhausted.

Yup, he’d just fallen a little bit more for Kuroo now. Well done Akaashi.

The next day was a Saturday though, and Akaashi didn’t have to think about work until Monday, and he could spend the weekend with Rika. He got out of bed and walked to the kitchen, where Rika was already sat at the table eating some cereal, she smiled brightly at him, “Morning, Keiji!”

“Morning.” Akaashi yawned, opening the cupboards to search for the coffee.

“Oh, by the way.” Rika paused, “Your phone buzzed about five minutes ago, a message from some Bokuto guy?”

Akaashi’s eyes widened. He gave Bokuto his number so they could discuss assignments, although they never texted at all, so why was he suddenly texting him now? “Did you see what the message was?”

“I’m not that nosy, geez!” Rika ate a spoonful of cereal and rolled her eyes, “Have at least some faith in me!”

“Alright, sorry.” Akaashi replied, picking up his phone and seeing that he did indeed have a message from Bokuto.

<< _I’m really sorry about showing up last night, I don’t know what I was thinking, but I know that your sister is round and I’d still really like to meet her. We could play volleyball at the park courts if you want?_

Akaashi frowned at the text. He didn’t want Bokuto thinking that he was in a relationship with Kuroo, although that’s what he’d like to be, but he appreciated that Bokuto might not even think that, so he didn’t want to bring it up unless he did himself. And anyway, a quick game of volleyball didn’t seem too bad.

>> _It’s fine, don’t worry about it. And yeah, that sounds great; I’ll see you there in about an hour?_

A reply came almost instantly.

<< _That’s fine! Thanks Akaashi!_

“Get dressed.” Akaashi said, locking his phone.

Rika looked up from her bowl, “Huh?”

“We’re going to play volleyball at the park with Bokuto; he plays as well and might have some pointers or whatever. Plus I think you’ll get on really well.” Akaashi explained.

“Sounds good.” Rika nodded, “Alright give me a sec, though, I still need to eat this!”

\---

The park was fairly quiet, but it was still early in the morning. Akaashi spotted Bokuto stretching on one of the courts at the far end of the park and smiled. Trust Bokuto to be a morning person.

When Bokuto saw them he straightened up and smiled brightly, “Akaashi!” he called.

Akaashi nodded at him and when they were close enough, stopped to introduce him to his sister, “Bokuto this is Rika, my sister, Rika this is my co-worker Bokuto.”

“Hi.” Rika replied. She was confident with people she knew well, and could be such a pain to people like Kuroo, but they were basically the same person personality wise. With people she didn’t know so well, it would take time for her not to get all embarrassed when talking to them, fortunately, Bokuto was good at getting people out of their shells.

“Hello!” he cried, “Right so I heard that you play on your high school team! That’s so cool, want to practice a little?”

Rika nodded, “Sure.”

“What position do you play at school?”

“Middle blocker, learnt most of my stuff off one of Keiji’s friends, he’s actually a good teacher despite being an absolute dumbass.”

Akaashi laughed and Bokuto smiled, “Alright, well, Akaashi what were you?”

“He was a setter. Pretty boring if you ask me.”

“Are you kidding me?!” Bokuto blurted. Rika and Akaashi jumped a little, but looked up at him for an answer, “Setters are _so_ cool! They’re the pillar of the team, they control the tempo, they lead their teammates, they’re the best! Of course... I’m a wing spiker, actually the ace in high school, so obviously I think they’re pretty cool too.”

“You’re an ace?” Rika asked, eyes wide, “Awesome.”

Bokuto beamed, “Right?! So how about you go one side of the net and try to block my spikes? Akaashi, can you set for me?”

Akaashi had originally come just to watch them play, he didn’t plan on joining in as well, but what the hell, he hadn’t played in ages and it’d be fun, “Sure!”

\---

Turns out Bokuto was called the ace for a reason. Not one of his spikes was blocked by Rika, but he was quick to cheer her up, “Don’t worry! You just need practice; you only lost against a top 5 ace from back in high school, so it’s understandable.”

Rika pouted, “I guess, it still sucks that you beat me. I mean, you were this good when you were in high school, probably even better with the constant practice, and I’m the same age as you and can do nothing.”

“Well...” Bokuto paused and looked up at Akaashi, he was over the other side of the park, barely visible, but was getting drinks from the vending machines, “I guess it helps that I had an amazing setter as well.”

There was silence for a second before Rika snorted, “Man, aren’t you so obvious!”

“W-what?” Bokuto’s eyes were wide.

“You are totally crushing on my brother!” Rika laughed, “It’s so obvious!”

“I’m not!” Bokuto defended, and Rika raised her eyebrows, “Really I’m not! Besides, it doesn’t matter because he has a boyfriend...”

“What?” Rika asked, leaning back a little, looking confused, “Keiji doesn’t have a boyfriend.”

Bokuto looked down at her, blinking a couple of times, “He... he doesn’t?”

Rika huffed a laugh and shook her head, “Who did you think he was dating? He hasn’t been in a relationship for ages, as far as I know.”

“Well I mean...” Bokuto scratched the back of his neck, “I saw him with a guy... yesterday, dark hair, looks like he just got out of bed and-”

Bokuto was interrupted when Rika burst out in uncontrollable laughter. She was clutching her sides and wiping away tears. Bokuto just stared at her. What was so funny? Why was she laughing? Did he say something he shouldn’t have? “What did I say?”

Rika took a deep breath before looking back up at him, “You’re kidding right? That’s Kuroo, Keiji’s best friend, they’ve been friends for like 4 years and no way are they dating... That’s hilarious!”

Bokuto shrugged, feeling a little embarrassed, “I mean, they just seemed pretty close, that’s all.”

“That’s because Kuroo was Keiji’s first proper friend since he moved here, so there’s no doubt they’d be close. Seriously. Keiji’s single, so if you like him, go for it!”

Bokuto was about to say something along the lines of ‘He probably doesn’t like me back’ when Akaashi walked up to them and handed them their drinks.

“Man, it’s nice weather today despite being winter.” He said, Bokuto just nodded along.

 _So, Akaashi_ wasn’t _dating that guy? That’s a relief. I thought he went out with me just to cheat on this guy, but it seems like I have nothing to worry about after all._

\---

Kuroo and Akaashi saw Rika off at the airport the next day. Akaashi hated saying goodbye to her not knowing when he’ll see her next. She said thank-you to Kuroo again for the ticket, and told Akaashi to say thank-you to Bokuto.

Kuroo drove Akaashi home afterwards, “So you hung out with Bokuto yesterday, you know I’m actually looking forward to meeting this guy, he’ll be at the Christmas party yeah? I want to put a face to the name.”

 _Oh yeah you already know what he looks like._ Was what Akaashi was thinking about saying, but all he replied with was, “Yeah, he will be. You’ll probably get along as well.”

That was true, Akaashi had a suspicion that they’ll get on like a house on fire. They had similar personalities, and Akaashi wasn’t sure if he could handle them meeting because of that very reason.

Akaashi got out of the car outside his apartment and leant on the roof, “Do you want to come in for some coffee?” he asked.

“Nah.” Kuroo replied, “I’ve got to get to the gym pretty quickly. Got a trainee waiting on me, thanks anyway.”

“No problem, see you.”

Kuroo gave a small wave before pulling out and onto the road. Akaashi watched him go before climbing the stairs to his apartment. It was empty, quiet and he didn’t like it one bit. Rika’s room was empty, looked boring like it did before she arrived. He sighed and sat on the couch, deciding what he should do next when his phone started ringing.

Akaashi didn’t recognise the number at first, but then it clicked and he realised it was one of the phones at the office. Who was at the office on a weekend? “Hello?”

“Akaashi I’m in the middle of a crisis and I don’t know what to do! You’re the first person I thought of and you have to help me!”

Ah. Oikawa would be at the office on a weekend.

“What did you do?” Akaashi asked, sitting forward, “Why are you at the office anyway? Isn’t it something Iwaizumi can help you with?”

Oikawa made some noise on the other end, “Iwa-chan is the _last_ person who I can go to for help! There is no way he can know about this!”

“Calm down, calm down... What’s wrong?”

“I- It’s so awful... Uh- I may have... accidentally of course, lost my engagement ring.” He mumbled.

Akaashi’s eyes widened and he didn’t speak for a moment, man if Iwaizumi found out he’d probably kill him. Akaashi had no idea how much that ring was, but judging by the size of it he’d say it was around 8 carats, and by the cut it would probably be 12,500 to 185,000 yen.

“Okay, Oikawa stay calm, I’m on my way, I’ll help find it, are you sure you lost it at the office?”

“About 80% sure I did, yeah, if not it might be at home but there is no way I’d be able to find it there what with all the cleaning that gets done, it’ll probably be vacuumed up or something!”

“Calm down!” Akaashi repeated, “I’m coming.”

Akaashi basically sprinted to the office. Only Oikawa would lose an engagement ring, but when Akaashi got there he seemed to be searching frantically for it.

“Where did you have it last?” he asked, sitting on the floor to look underneath a cabinet.

“If I knew that I’d have it!” Oikawa replied, his voice shaky, “Oh God if Iwa-chan finds out I’m dead.”

“Relax, we’ll find it before he has to know, alright?”

“He’s going to notice if I go home without it on! I always wear it, he’ll know for sure! He’ll probably call of the wedding, leave me and-”

Akaashi pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, “Will you stop panicking for one moment? Yes, he’ll probably be incredibly annoyed at you, but he’s not going to leave you for God’s sake. He loves you; there is no way in hell he’s that stupid to break up with you over something like that, okay?”

Oikawa sighed, “I suppose... Still, he’ll just be so disappointed.”

“So let’s not disappoint him then, yeah?” Akaashi replied, going back to searching underneath bits of furniture.

They were searching for a good half an hour before Oikawa sat back and admitted defeat. Akaashi glared at him, and was about to say something when another co-worker walked in.

“What are you doing here?” he asked.

“Ah, Tsukishima!” Oikawa exclaimed, “Have you seen my engagement ring anywhere?”

“I found it earlier when I came in to do some filing. I saw your fiancé earlier by the coffee shop so I gave it to him.”

Oikawa’s jaw dropped and his eyes widened. Akaashi was staring at him, trying to figure out if he was going to panic again or something.

“Y-you gave it to I-Iwa-chan?”

Tsukishima nodded, “Yeah, I uh, I have go now though, but I thought you should know I found it. See you Monday.”

Oikawa nodded faintly, and Akaashi was still looking at him, “Oikawa-”

“He’s going to kill me.” Oikawa interrupted, “I’m going to go home and meet my doom.” He looked up at Akaashi, who just looked back at him like he was an idiot.

Akaashi rolled his eyes, “Right okay, go home, and you’ll be fine. He’s not going to kill you and at least it’s not lost, it’ll be fine.”

“R-right. Uh, can you be there as well, like a witness?”

Akaashi sighed, but nodded, “Fine.”

Akaashi had never been to Oikawa’s house before, but he was impressed to say the least. He knew Iwaizumi was successful, and Oikawa himself was actually pretty wealthy due to inheritance and his position at the company, but he was not expecting his house to look like this.

It was only 2 stories; but it was fairly modern and still had character to it. There was a gate at the roadside, and a long driveway actually leading to the house. Iwaizumi’s car was _nice,_ Akaashi was pretty sure it was a Maserati, but he didn’t have time to check for sure because Oikawa was pulling him towards the front door, “Okay, if you’re with me he’s less likely to be mad.”

Akaashi rolled his eyes, “Just go inside already.”

Oikawa nervously opened the door. Akaashi was taken aback by how nice it was inside, all the nice decor and modern touches to it, it was very Oikawa. “Iwa-chan! I’m home!” he called.

 After slipping out of their shoes and into slippers, it wasn’t long before Iwaizumi came out of a room and into the entrance hall. He didn’t particularly look mad, but looks can be deceiving. “Welcome back, oh- Hi, Akaashi.”

“Sorry to just show up like this but-”

“I asked him if he wanted to come over for a drink, I saw him at the office and invited him back.” Oikawa blurted out his words so quickly, but Akaashi was quite glad he did so he wouldn’t have to think of an answer himself.

“Well make yourself at home, follow me.” Iwaizumi gestured. Akaashi followed Oikawa and Iwaizumi into the kitchen, and by the looks of it, it was bigger than Akaashi’s entire apartment.

“W-wow...” he said quietly as he looked around. There were potted plants on most of the counters, which were white and had grey marbled tops.

Oikawa sat down on one of the bar stools, and gestured for Akaashi to join him whilst Iwaizumi walked round the bar and started preparing some drinks. Akaashi was pretty impressed by their alcohol collection.

“So how’s your thing with Kuroo?” Oikawa asked.

Akaashi looked up, and could see Iwaizumi do the same in his peripheral, clearly interested, “I-it’s going okay...”

Oikawa frowned, “You still have feelings for him?”

Iwaizumi watched him carefully, knowing that Oikawa could and would sometimes accidentally overstep boundaries.

Akaashi nodded, “Yup.”

“And you’re still sleeping with him?”

There it was, Iwaizumi put down his glasses and frowned, “Oikawa enough.”

Oikawa fell silent, and Akaashi felt a little awkward, “N-no it’s okay” he said to Iwaizumi, who didn’t look convinced, “Really... I uh, yes I am still sleeping with him, which I know is a bad idea but, I can’t help it.”

“You know Bokuto likes you, why don’t you like him.”

Before Akaashi could answer, though he didn’t even have an answer, Iwaizumi put two drinks down in front of them, he looked at Akaashi and sighed, “You don’t need to answer that.” He said, before turning to his fiancé, “By the way, what were you doing at the office anyway? It’s a weekend.”

Oikawa stiffened, and Akaashi felt a sudden tension in the air. He watched as Iwaizumi stared at Oikawa, clearly awaiting an answer, “Well?”

“I had some stuff to file before Monday.” Oikawa lied, and Iwaizumi saw straight through it.

“Don’t bullshit to me, Oikawa. You know that doesn’t make it any better so just tell the truth.”

Akaashi felt incredibly awkward. Was he supposed to leave? Should he stay? Even if he wanted to leave he felt like he was being weighed down to that chair, and he couldn’t look away.

“You already know why I was there!” Oikawa looked down at his lap, “Are you going to make me say it anyway?”

Iwaizumi sighed and leant over the bar to lift Oikawa’s chin upwards so he could look at him, “Don’t think that I don’t care, Tooru.” He said softly, and Akaashi had never felt more of an urge to leave before, but he just _couldn’t_ for some reason. “But it’s okay if you lose things once in a while, alright?”

“Even something like an _engagement_ ring?” Oikawa sniffed, feeling exactly like a child being told off, “I’m so sorry, so, so sorry.”

Iwaizumi took a deep breath, “I’m really pissed at you, you know? Because you really made me worry.” Oikawa looked down again but Iwaizumi kept his hand in place as he leaned further across to whisper in Oikawa’s ear, “But I’ll punish you later.”

That made Akaashi’s legs move. He got up way quicker than intended and gave himself a little bit of a head rush, but that didn’t matter because no way was he going to stay there any longer whilst they got... you know. “Alright! I’ve got to get going! So I’ll see you Monday, Oikawa, and most likely at the Christmas Party, Iwaizumi... Thanks for the drink. Bye!” Then he was gone.

Oikawa and Iwaizumi exchanged a look before Iwaizumi shrugged, “Or maybe now.”

\---

Akaashi did a full body shudder when he left Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s house. That was not an image he needed in his head and yet, there it was. He decided a good walk home would clear his mind.

Fortunately, it did, and when he got home he decided to search online for some clothes he could buy for the Christmas party, considering he didn’t have anything to wear for it yet. He wanted to look good, unlike last year when he didn’t really put that much effort in at all. But this time he was going with Kuroo, and he knew Kuroo would look good and there was no way that he would look bad, there would be pictures and everything, so he _had_ to look flawless. He knew standing next to Kuroo would be difficult anyway, what with the fact that he _always_ looks good, but that was something he’d just have to endure.

In the end, he just ended up ordering some black fitted trousers and a nice dress shirt. Their Christmas parties weren’t exactly black tie, but they weren’t skinny jeans and v-neck either. He hoped Kuroo would look presentable, it wouldn’t be the first time he’s invited him to a work thing and he’s completely embarrassed him by wearing something absolutely inappropriate. Just to make sure though, he sent him a text.

>> _Have you gotten something for the Christmas party yet?_

<< _Of course I have. I planned my outfit the moment you invited me, in my head, of course. I’ll send you a pic but you have to promise not to get turned on by it._

Akaashi rolled his eyes and waited for the picture to come through. Kuroo was right, actually, Akaashi did have a hard time _not_ getting turned on by the image that was sent. Kuroo had obviously taken this a while ago, probably whilst finding an outfit, and decided that he should take a photo in the mirror. Akaashi didn’t have any objections to that though.

He was wearing something similar to what Akaashi was going to wear, but he pulled it off so much better. His trousers were more fitted, and made his legs look incredible, and he was wearing a black shirt with the top three buttons undone to show off his chest, and of course his hair was going to be a mess, but in some way that finished off the look perfectly.

Akaashi must’ve been staring at it for too long because he was suddenly alerted by another text.

<< _That turned on are we? Like what you see?_

Akaashi made a promise to himself that Kuroo would definitely be getting laid on the 17th.

>> _You look good._

That was all he could send, with the fear that it would somehow get across that he was really horny through text messages.

\---

“Akaashi!”

That was a voice he could probably do without hearing first thing on a Monday, but hey, when you work with Bokuto it’s not something you can avoid.

“What?” he asked, looking up from his desk momentarily.

“I brought you a coffee on my way here! Oh, and a doughnut, but I kind of ate it already...” Bokuto sighed, but he dropped the cup on Akaashi’s desk with a smile.

“Thank-you anyway.” Akaashi replied, still typing away at his computer. When he noticed Bokuto was still there, he looked away from the screen, “Can I help you with something?”

“No- nothing, just... what are you doing?”

Akaashi looked back to his screen, displaying different advertising companies and the work that they had done. It probably looked bad to somebody like Bokuto, like he was looking for another job or something, but it was simply research. “I’m looking into other advertisement agencies to see what kind of competition we have. I still haven’t gotten another assignment and thought I may as well put some effort into something else whilst I’m here.”

Bokuto nodded along, although he didn’t seem to understand, he changed the subject afterwards anyway, “So who’s your plus one to the Christmas party?”

Akaashi seemed surprised by the question, and paused in his movements, “Just a friend. Kuroo.”

“Was he the one at yours on Friday?”

Akaashi hesitated, Bokuto was being incredibly blunt about this, “Yes, the one that was at my apartment on Friday. Uhm- I think you’ll get along great, I’ll have to introduce you.”

Bokuto tilted his head, “Won’t he recognise me?”

Akaashi sighed, “I doubt it. It was dark and despite what he says, he actually has a bad short-term memory.”

“Oh...” Bokuto was still stood there, and Akaashi wasn’t sure if he should go back to his research or talk some more, but it seemed as though Bokuto wasn’t done anyway, “Are you free tonight?”

“W-what?”

Bokuto looked a little guilty; like he’d thought he sprung that question too quickly or something. He stood there rubbing the back of his neck with a goofy grin on his face, one that Akaashi actually quite liked, “I- I just thought you could come round and we could watch a movie or something... You know.”

“Like a date?” Akaashi asked.

It’s not that Akaashi minded going on dates with Bokuto, despite this being his second, it’s just he knew that whilst he was feeling what he felt for Kuroo, there was no way Bokuto would be able to work his way into his heart without a good amount of time. So really, it was pointless. All he was doing by suggesting these meet-ups was making them more and more _friendly,_ and the worst thing to do with somebody you like is to be their friend. Akaashi knew _that_ all too well.

“Well- I mean... kinda?” Bokuto said, “Although, not if you don’t want it to be.”

Akaashi nodded, “Alright, that sounds good. I don’t know where you live so you’ll have to text me your address or something.”

Bokuto grinned widely, “Yeah! Of course! That’s absolutely fine, thanks!”

Akaashi watched him go back to his own desk before turning back to his monitor. Why... just _why_ did he agree to go to his afterwards? That was the last thing he should’ve done. Now he’s just leading him on! Well, at least he actually had a chance of being the boyfriend of this one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was weird wasn't it? 
> 
> Oh well, I really hope you liked it and still continue to read this story, the support has been great and I'm so happy people are liking it so far! Please look out for the next one which should be up within a couple of days, and have a good day!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little shorter than the others, but that's because it's finally getting to the good stuff and I didn't want to give too much away in this chapter so I could start writing the main story at the beginning of the next one, so I hope that's cool with you guys. Don't worry though, because next chapter is full of drama and angst and shit which I'm sure you'll enjoy (hopefully)
> 
> but for now, please enjoy this (shorter) chapter!

Akaashi was really regretting his decision. But he couldn’t exactly back out now, could he? Bokuto was inside the apartment in front of him, probably rushing around and making sure the place was tidy enough and whatever he was doing, so he can’t just turn around and stand him up.

Although, despite how mean his sounded, Akaashi did ask Kuroo to text him at some point claiming that there was an emergency, and that it was up to Akaashi or not if he was going to use it as an excuse to get the hell out of there.

With a deep breath, he walked up to the door and gave two knocks against it. He could hear shuffling around behind the closed door, and soon afterwards it was opened, and Akaashi was greeted by a tired looking Bokuto, complete with a stack of DVDs in one hand and a piece of paper hanging out of his mouth. He tried saying Akaashi’s name, but admitted defeat when he realised it would be incredibly difficult.

“Are... are you okay?” Akaashi asked.

Bokuto gave an enthusiastic nod and opened the door wider, beckoning Akaashi into the house. It was around the same size as Akaashi’s, maybe a little more cluttered, but it seemed homely and he liked that.

He walked into the living area and looked around. There was a couch one end, facing a large TV which was mounted to the wall. Akaashi raised his eyebrows at that.

“Sorry about the mess...” Bokuto sighed as he put his stuff down on the coffee table, “I kinda invited you round forgetting how much I needed to sort this stuff out. Uh- make yourself comfortable, do you want a drink?”

“Just water, please.” Akaashi replied, taking a seat on the couch.

Bokuto nodded again and went into the kitchen. Akaashi was sat there alone, completely unaware of what the hell he should do. He hoped it wouldn’t be this awkward for the entire time.

“Here you go!” Bokuto said, coming back in and putting a glass on the coffee table, “Uh, so do you want to order a pizza and put a movie on?”

Akaashi knew Bokuto felt awkward as well, “You know, if you’re not up for this now we could-”

“NO!” Bokuto blurted, and Akaashi flinched backwards, “I- sorry... It’s not that I just- It’s kind of awkward...”

“I know.”

Bokuto perched on the end of the coffee table in front of Akaashi, he was looking down and had his arms resting on his thighs, “Akaashi I- I just really, _really_ like you and I’m messing up and it’s really embarrassing. But I just, I think you’re amazing.”

Akaashi knew that already but...

Bokuto looked up, and Akaashi suddenly felt locked in his gaze. “Akaashi...”

Akaashi was well aware of the look Bokuto was giving him. His eyes were full of admiration and love and... a hint of hunger? Akaashi’s heartbeat was thundering in his ears and his hands were getting incredibly sweaty but Bokuto was leaning so close to him his whole body felt dangerously warm. He swallowed thickly when he saw Bokuto start to get closer, bit by bit.

He saw Bokuto’s eyes drop from his to his lips and he stuck his tongue out to wet his own. Akaashi knew what he was doing, but for some reason he couldn’t stop him.

Then it clicked; the sudden impulse to stop him before it leads somewhere he didn’t want it to go. Bokuto was so close to him, he could feel his breath against his face and if he didn’t do something now soon they would be kissing, and that’s not what Akaashi wanted.

Akaashi stuck his hand in between their faces, and felt Bokuto’s lips hit his palm, Bokuto looked up surprised, but when Akaashi said, “What movies do you have?” his expression dropped and he pulled away.

“I- I have comedies?” Bokuto stuttered, clearly embarrassed by his actions.

Akaashi swallowed again and nodded, “That sounds great.”

But when Bokuto got up to go look through his DVDs, Akaashi felt nauseous, really, _really_ nauseous, and guilty and he had to-

“Actually, Bokuto,” he said, making the other turn around curiously, “I’ve just gotten a text, and I’m really sorry but-”

Bokuto nodded knowingly and cut him off, “It’s okay, I get it. If you want to leave, just leave, I’m not going to stop you.”

Akaashi felt relieved that he had said that, but he couldn’t not miss the sad expression on Bokuto’s face, no matter how hard he tried to obscure it. He stood up and started to walk towards the door, “I- I’m sorry... I’ll see you tomorrow.”

As soon as he was out of the door and in the cold air, Akaashi sighed deeply and put his head in his hands. Why... _Why_ did he say yes? He’d really fucked it up now. Bokuto was an amazing guy, and he would probably be an amazing boyfriend, but he wasn’t the one that Akaashi wanted. Akaashi wanted Kuroo, to be the one Kuroo kissed in the mornings, and when he came back from work, to cuddle up to him whilst they watched movies, with their hands and legs intertwined under a blanket. He wanted to be able to tell Kuroo how much he loved him whenever he wanted to, wherever he wanted to.

But of course, he couldn’t. Because Kuroo didn’t love him, and Bokuto did.

The next decision was probably the worst he could’ve made in this situation. But as bad as it was, Akaashi was certain about one thing; he needed a good fucking.

\---

Kuroo had no complaints when Akaashi showed up at his apartment, pinned him against a wall and stuck his knee between Kuroo’s legs, in fact he appeared to catch on relatively quickly and lifted Akaashi up only to throw him down on the bed moments later.

It was a mess, it really was. Every time they had sex it was because of a bad day at work, a drunken fumble in the dark, stress relieving, and not the one thing sex was meant to be about. Love.

In a way, Akaashi felt used, like Kuroo was taking advantage of the fact Akaashi was so in love with him and used it as a gateway to all the sex he wanted with no strings attached, but because Kuroo had no idea whatsoever about Akaashi’s feelings, that wasn’t a valid theory. Although, he couldn’t really dwell on it too much when he’s got a gorgeous 6ft.1 athlete with a tongue which works miracles between his thighs.

\---

They laid there sweating and panting and Akaashi had forgotten why he’d been so stressed in the first place. He hated not being able to snuggle up to Kuroo in the same way a boyfriend would be able to, but he appreciated the arm over his waist as he slept peacefully at his side. Kuroo was a great friend, and Akaashi didn’t want to ruin that by saying anything, so he swore to himself to keep quiet.

\---

The next few days at work, and seeing Bokuto, were awkward. He didn’t come up to Akaashi’s desk like he usually does, didn’t bring him a coffee at break time, never even looked his way, not that Akaashi was putting in any effort to see him either. He was still to get a new assignment from Oikawa, but he hadn’t really had a chance to show his team work skills yet, so he wasn’t surprised when he saw his colleagues get them instead, especially Bokuto.

But the days that they spent avoiding each other turned into weeks, and most nights Akaashi wound up at Kuroo’s, spending the night there and regretting it in the morning, and falling deeper and deeper in love with him.

Soon though, it was the Christmas party. Akaashi _had_ been looking forward to it, but that was before all the mutual awkwardness between him and Bokuto. Now he was just thankful that he had Kuroo to stick to the entire time. Seriously he was planning to stay with him the entire night people would think they were stuck together with glue.

“You ready to go?” Kuroo’s voice rang through Akaashi’s apartment. They were getting ready together, simply because if they didn’t Akaashi would be worried he’d lose him and be on his own the entire time.

Akaashi came out of the bathroom and almost fainted when he saw Kuroo. It was better than the photo; the photo did him no justice at all. This, right before him, was almost enough for him to drop his pants right then and there, but he had pride and restraint and told himself to wait until after the party. He could at least do that.

“You look fucking hot.” Kuroo whistled, giving Akaashi’s ass a quick slap as he walked past. Akaashi ignored the way his cheeks burned at that.

“You don’t look so bad yourself.” Akaashi stated.

“Please.” Kuroo waved a hand, “I saw you staring.” He grinned.

They left the apartment after that, got in the taxi and headed to the hotel where the party was. Some people booked room for the night, so they didn’t have to run the risk of throwing up in the taxi and having to pay the fine for it, but Akaashi decided he probably didn’t need to do that as he was never the type to get so drunk he’d throw up. Kuroo, though, was.

“It’s open bar right?” Kuroo asked, getting out the taxi and looking up at the hotel.

“Yeah.”Akaashi replied, paying the driver and standing next to Kuroo, before pushing him forward and following him into the lobby area, then through the doors to the main event room.

Akaashi recognised almost everybody there. He could see everybody that was in his department, including Bokuto, who already had a drink in hand and was talking to Oikawa and Iwaizumi. Akaashi thought about going to join them, but didn’t want to make things more awkward than they had to be.

Unfortunately, Oikawa noticed him and waved him over. Akaashi grabbed Kuroo’s arm and held him close, kind of like a safety net.

“Akaashi!” Oikawa called, “You’re here! Ooh, who’s your friends, is this Kuroo?”

Kuroo gave a small wave and Akaashi nodded, “Yeah, uh, Oikawa, Iwaizumi and-” Akaashi looked around for a third party but then realised that Bokuto had walked away, “Uh- this is Kuroo, Kuroo this is Oikawa, my manager and Iwaizumi, his fiancé.”

Iwaizumi shook Kuroo’s hand, but Oikawa batted his eyelashes at him, “Well...” he sang, “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance. You are absolutely-”

“You finish that sentence and you’re sleeping on the couch tonight.” Iwaizumi cut him off. Akaashi was used to Oikawa’s mindless flirting by now, and knew that Iwaizumi didn’t take it to heart anymore, but Kuroo stood there, and awkward but still attractive grin on his face.

“It’s uh- nice to meet you too.” He replied.

Akaashi sighed, “Right, well, we’re going to take advantage of the free bar, so if you’ll excuse us.”

“Not at all~” Oikawa waved Kuroo goodbye, only to get hit on the back of the head by Iwaizumi.

“Is he... always like that?” Kuroo asked when they walked up to the bar.

“Oikawa? Yeah, pretty much. He flirts with almost everybody so...” Akaashi replied, ordering a martini.

“And his fiancé doesn’t have a problem with it?”

Akaashi shrugged, “He did at first, but he knew that it didn’t mean anything, and Oikawa would never actually cheat, he’s too in love with Iwaizumi to do that.”

“Right...”

After ordering their drinks, they went and found a couple of couches to sit down on, where they spoke to Akaashi’s other colleagues, Tsukishima, who was in his department, and Konoha and Sugawara who worked on another floor.

Kuroo seemed too distracted by Tsukishima to make any sensible contribution to the group, and Akaashi was jealous. He wanted to be the one that Kuroo stared at, but, it was this guy who literally complained about everything and always looked bored. At least Akaashi was enthusiastic about things.

“Konoha there you are!” A familiar voice brought Akaashi out of his state of dreaming. His eyes blew wide when he saw Bokuto sit down opposite him, wedging himself in next to Konoha and Suga.

“Yeah, man, where’d you get off to?”

“I went to check out the dance floor in the next room, it’s _awesome_ it’s-” Bokuto was looking round the circle, but cut himself off when he saw Akaashi staring back at him. He didn’t see him when he sat down and now he had to interact with him and- oh God this was awkward.

Although, thankfully, Bokuto didn’t seem to care all that much and turned to Kuroo, “I don’t know you!” he said, standing up and stretching out a hand, “I’m Bokuto!”

Kuroo grinned, and fortunately didn’t recognise Bokuto, “Kuroo! Dude nice outfit.”

“I could say the same about you, man!” Bokuto beamed, “Anyway, you guys want to hit the dance floor? It’s super cool!”

“I’m down for it.” Konoha shrugged, and Suga nodded.

They both stood up and followed Bokuto away. Kuroo stood as well, but when he saw Akaashi was still sitting he grabbed his hand and pulled him along anyway, “You’re not getting out of this one. It’ll be fun!” he said.

\---

 _“It’ll be fun!”_ Yeah right, that was probably the opposite of fun. As soon as they got on the dance floor they were squashed by loads of people and you could hardly breathe; let alone dance, and the worst thing? Akaashi lost Kuroo within a matter of seconds.

He managed to find his way out of the mass of people and went to sit at one of the bars, ordering another drink. This was not going the way he planned. He looked all over the place, but Kuroo’s messy bed head was nowhere to be seen, so he’d given up and turned to the booze.

Akaashi vaguely noticed Oikawa sit down next to him, Iwaizumi wasn’t with him, but he didn’t expect them to stay together for the whole night, “What’re you doing here?”

“Despite this being a Christmas party for our company?” Akaashi countered.

Oikawa held up his hands, “What’s your problem?” he asked, ordering himself a drink, “Do I need to get the shots out?”

Akaashi shook his head, “I’ve lost my safety net.”

Oikawa took a sip of his drink before turning back to Akaashi, “I have no idea what that means, but that sucks, man.”

Akaashi smiled, “It’s just... I thought I’d be able to stay with Kuroo the whole night so nothing bad happens, but I’ve lost him, so now I’m alone, and awkward and I can’t even look Bokuto in the eye anymore.”

“That because of what happened a few weeks ago?” Oikawa asked. Of course Oikawa knew, he was like a fucking mind reader or something. Akaashi always hated that about him.

“I was at his to watch movies and he tried kissing me. I left not five minutes afterwards.”

“And you’re still dwelling on it?” Oikawa asked, he seemed really surprised, “Man, I thought by the way you two were hardly speaking it was something way, _way_ worse, but that was nothing! Come on, Akaashi!”

“Seriously?” Akaashi raised an eyebrow, “It was pretty awkward.”

“I’m not saying it wasn’t. But you’re a rational person and do you really see anything rational in how you’re letting this affect you? Just have a fucking conversation with the guy; he’s the type to get over things pretty fast.”

Akaashi shook his head, “I’d rather wait for him to come to me, if I’m completely honest.”

Oikawa held up his hands, “Fair enough. Do what you want.”

Akaashi didn’t really want to hang around anymore, because he knew Oikawa would start bragging about Iwaizumi soon and he could really do without that. So he settled on going to find Kuroo, because if he found him, he was sure that he’d be okay.

“I’m going to go find Kuroo.” He said, getting up.

“Alright. I’ll get some shots ready for when you return!” Oikawa called after him as he disappeared into the sea of people.

Akaashi honestly had no idea where to start. The hotel was huge and Kuroo could literally be anywhere from the upstairs hotel suites to the cellar, although that would be weird.

He searched the toilets first, and found nothing but a couple who clearly wanted each other more than the free buffet the hotel had put out. He left with a sigh and continued his search. The lobby was empty apart from the receptionist and there was nobody outside but a guy who needed a cigarette break. He was about to give up but when he walked back into the main event room and took a look at the dance floor, he saw that messy bed head and grinned. _Finally!_ He thought.

Although... not finally, definitely not finally. As Akaashi took a step closer towards the dance floor, he noticed that Kuroo wasn’t alone, and hell, Kuroo wasn’t even _dancing._ No, instead, he appeared to be in an intense lip-lock with none other than Tsukishima. Akaashi felt his heart drop, break in fact, and he couldn’t tear his eyes away. Everybody was dancing around them, and the fact that they weren’t made them stick out like a sore thumb.

Tsukishima’s hands were in Kuroo’s hair, his glasses pushed up on his nose slightly. Kuroo’s hands on the back of his neck, pulling him closer.

His palms were sweaty and his heartbeat was in his ears and oh my God. He just hoped Oikawa was still at the bar, because he headed in that direction with nothing but heartbreak and lots of shots on his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ......  
>  How was that?  
> Did you like the cliff-hanger kind of thing I left there?  
> Also... KUROTSUKKI!! Woop! I waited so long to start writing their part in this and I am so happy I get to share it with you now, although, poor Akaashi, that was mean of me! 
> 
> Let me know what you think, and if there were any mistakes, and look out for the next chapter where things get very interesting!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard to write, I hope by the end of it you can understand why, because the angst is getting real now. But I love Akaashi and Bokuto and Kuroo and all of them, so it made it twice as hard and I hate writing bad things for them but like... it's the plot so I have to! But I am really enjoying this story, and I hope you are as well!

He didn’t know what he was doing. All he could hear was Oikawa laughing at something, which probably wasn’t funny at all, to his right, and the sound of shot glasses hitting the surface. So maybe it wasn’t very appropriate to down this many shots at a work party, but Akaashi was too far gone the point of actually caring. Who was he kidding, anyway? He didn’t have the right to go round telling Kuroo who he should and should not date; it’s not like they were dating each other.

Oikawa leant his head against Akaashi’s shoulder, “You’re fun like this...” he drawled.

Akaashi smiled at him, finding the way his face blurred funny. He was sad though when Iwaizumi came over and slung Oikawa over his shoulder and carried him away, saying something about how he shouldn’t get that drunk or whatever.

Akaashi sat at the bar still, but now he was alone and everything that just happened came back and this time, it was worse. He turned around, away from the bartender and looked out over the dance floor. Everybody seemed to be having a good time, though that might have been the drunken haze Akaashi was seeing instead, but there were heads of people bobbing up and down in time to the music, which by now had gotten way too loud for his liking.

Then his eyes landed on Konoha, who was dancing awfully with... Bokuto. Bokuto’s outfit was doing A grade stuff for his body, the way his deep purple button up shirt clung to his sculpted body, the sleeves rolled up showing off his muscular forearms, how his ass looked incredibly round in those black jeans. Akaashi squinted, as though that would help him see through the alcoholic haze, at the two figures in the crowd. They were towards the edge, so they weren’t too mixed up with the other dancers. Akaashi watched Bokuto move, the way his body swayed to the beat, the way his smile was plastered on his face and anybody who didn’t know him would think that it was fake, but Akaashi knew that’s just what he always looked like. Happy.

Akaashi wanted to be happy. He wanted to forget about the shitty thing Kuroo had done and just feel good. Feel... good...  
His eyes landed on Bokuto again, and he got up.

It may have been the alcohol in his system, the 7 shots which he really shouldn’t have done, or he actually thought it was a good idea. But he was walking towards the dance floor, towards Bokuto and without thinking about it a second longer he’d grabbed Bokuto by the shirt collar, ignored the yelp he made and the comment from Konoha, dragged him all the way into the lobby, into the narrow corridor and into the toilets.

If Bokuto had a problem with what Akaashi did next, he didn’t voice it.

But Akaashi knew that Bokuto wanted him. Loved him, wanted to be with him and that’s all the motivation he needed to start digging into the guys pants. Bokuto made some sort of comment, but Akaashi’s mind was too alcohol-logged he didn’t hear a single word of it.

He was kissing Bokuto roughly. It was messy, it was sweaty but hey, both of them were drunk and this was wrong but it was so right at the same time. Akaashi’s hands were in Bokuto’s hair, pulling at the strands and Bokuto’s tongue was prodding around Akaashi’s mouth and it felt _incredible._

Akaashi was gasping, and he was pretty sure that if Bokuto was sober, he would’ve found the taste of Akaashi’s breath very unattractive, what with the alcohol and all.

Akaashi’s hands wandered south and he started pulling Bokuto’s shirt out of his trousers, popping the button and unzipping them, and soon enough his hand was in his boxers and if Bokuto wasn’t hard already he sure as hell was now.

Akaashi was sucking at his neck whilst jerking him off and Bokuto was fumbling with Akaashi’s button and zip, and now his hand was down Akaashi’s boxers and was jerking him off as well.

But it wasn’t enough, it wasn’t enough for Akaashi. He needed _more._ So he dropped to his knees and let his mouth continue where his hand left off. There wasn’t even any teasing, he just went straight in and Bokuto had to brace himself on the wall.

“Aka- hmm _fuck_ Akaashi...” Bokuto moaned. He had his hand fisted into Akaashi’s hair. But, this _still_ wasn’t enough.

Akaashi pulled away from Bokuto and quickly pulled his trousers down to his knees, then did the same with Bokuto. “Lift me up and fuck me against the wall.” He said. That probably would’ve sounded a lot sexier if he wasn’t carrying the weight of heartbreak _and_ 7 shots of pure vodka on his shoulders.

But Bokuto didn’t seem to mind, and quickly picked Akaashi up and pressed him against the wall. Akaashi wrapped his legs around Bokuto’s waist and felt him press up against him.  
It probably would’ve hurt a lot more if he wasn’t absolutely shitfaced, and man it would _kill_ in the morning. But finally he felt full, gasping and moaning and shuddering against a bathroom wall, being fucked by some guy he really shouldn’t be fucking.

He didn’t have the time to worry about things like a condom, or prep, he just wanted to feel something, to be one step ahead of the fuckface Kuroo who was playing tonsil tennis with his co-worker in the next room. The guy who was supposed to fall in love with him but inevitably didn’t.

The rest of the night was a blur. He didn’t remember being much, only the faint memory of being stuffed into a cab, and then passing out on his bed. Nonetheless, he felt content, despite having shit ideas.

\---

Akaashi opened his eyes slowly, and blinked in order to focus his eyes. His body hurt all over, and he didn’t even dare to try and sit up. Instead, he threw his hand to the side and started reaching for things on the nightstand, mostly his phone. The time read 12:32 and Akaashi groaned; he hated waking up too late, and was just thankful that it was the weekend.

With a lot of effort, Akaashi managed to sit up and told himself not to lie down again until he’d gotten some painkillers. His head wrecked and his legs were on fire, not to mention the burn in his lower abdomen. Yeah, maybe the whole thing with Bokuto was a bad idea...

Oh shit. _Shit!_ The thing with Bokuto. Akaashi scrunched his face up at the memory. What the hell was he thinking? He pinched the bridge of his nose and swore. That was probably the worst decision he could have possibly made, and hoped that, however unlikely it is, Bokuto would forget that it happened. Akaashi had a strong idea that he wouldn’t.

He unlocked his phone and stared at the screen. There were multiple texts from Oikawa, asking where he went after they took shots, if he got home okay and how his hangover was. Akaashi cursed Oikawa; the guy _never_ got a hangover. He was like a sponge, absorbing the alcohol before it affected him and never once had to take a painkiller the next day.

Instead of texting back, Akaashi just decided to call him; it would also save the trouble of having to squint at a small screen with a bad headache as well.

“Hello?” Oikawa asked, he sounded cheerful as ever, “Akaashi?”

“I had sex with Bokuto.” Great. No hello, now how are you, just an _I had sex with Bokuto._ Fair enough.

Oikawa gasped on the other end, “Is _that_ was you got up to! Akaashi, congratulations!”

Akaashi grimaced at how loud Oikawa was, and could only mumble his reply, “No. Not congratulations, unless you’re congratulating me on how much I fucked up. It was totally wrong of me to do that, he’s in love with me and I just gave him the most messed up signal ever.”

Oikawa waved his hand around in the air, as if Akaashi could actually see it, “Don’t be stupid... well, yeah you fucked up but I mean, don’t you like him?”

“No.” Akaashi replied bluntly. God he really was the worst human in the world. “Well I- I like him as a friend but... I used him and I don’t think he’ll forgive me for that.”

Oikawa sighed, “Akaashi I’m going to tell you something which is wrong of me and it’s not fair on Bokuto, but it’s the only advice I have.”

Akaashi has gotten advice from Oikawa before, and it wasn’t exactly the best advice he could’ve gotten, but it helped in most situations. Sure, none of them were as big and serious as this, but nonetheless they still helped, “I’m listening.”

“Bokuto doesn’t have to know if you used him or not.” Oikawa said, “Look, I don’t know what you did, or what happened to make you think that, but either way he doesn’t have to find out, so just don’t tell him.”

“And let the guilt eat me away?” Akaashi raised his eyebrows, “Doesn’t really go in my favour does it?”

“Hear me out.” Oikawa replied, “I’m just saying, if you want to be his friend and keep him happy, then just keep it to-”

“I saw Kuroo making out with Tsukishima.” Akaashi interrupted, “That’s why I had sex with Bokuto. I felt unwanted, and went to the person I knew wanted me.”

Oikawa was silent, and Akaashi kept the phone close to his ear, despite knowing he should be getting painkillers instead. However, the conversation he had seemed to take his mind of the throbbing all over his body for a brief moment. “Oikawa?”

“I’m sorry, Akaashi...” the older paused, “I- I shouldn’t have said what I did. That sucks, and Kuroo doesn’t know what he’s missing, so- don’t worry though, you’ll figure it out.”

Akaashi nodded to himself, “Right, thanks, Oikawa.”

“No problem. See you Monday.”

“See you Monday.” Akaashi hung up his phone and returned it to the nightstand. He put his head in his hands because he was in such a mess with no way to get out. He started to move and was met by a painful throb in his left temple. Right, painkillers.

With a sigh, Akaashi moved to get out of bed, but when he stood up his legs gave way and he fell back against the bed. “Shit...” he swore. His hips and legs were killing him, and he still felt stretched. There was no way he’d be able to make it to the bathroom or kitchen to get what he needed. There was only one other option. He’d have to call Kuroo, knowing that he’d be able to get the things for him, no questions asked.

He reached for his phone once more and opened up his chat with Kuroo, sending a quick text.

>> _Can you come over?_

<< _On my way_

Akaashi smiled at the text he received almost immediately. He liked the way Kuroo always responded the moment he got a message, and was always there for him, without worrying whether or not he judged him or not. Of course, this didn’t apply to the fact that he was in love with him, because oh God if he told Kuroo that there would be no going back.

Kuroo arrived a lot faster than Akaashi had expected, but he walked into his room and gasped at the mess Akaashi looked like. “Uh, are you okay?”

Akaashi didn’t want to look up at him, knowing it would just make his chest feel tighter. He regretted his decision to call Kuroo, but he was the only one who could help. He wasn’t sure what he should ask Kuroo to get for him, because he was pretty certain no amount of painkillers could numb the pain he was feeling, “Can you get me some painkillers please?”

“S-sure.” Kuroo left to go get them, and Akaashi closed his eyes. He knew that sooner or later he’d have to explain to Kuroo why he drank so much and needed somebody else to get things for him. Except he could do with leaving one huge detail out of it.

Kuroo didn’t say anything when he came back, he simply handed Akaashi some tablets and a glass of water. Akaashi took them with a small smile, and watched Kuroo out of the corner of his eye as he sat down on the end of Akaashi’s bed. He had a concerned look on his face, but he was looking at the ground and didn’t say a word.

That was what it was like for the next 2 hours. They moved to the living room to be more comfortable, Akaashi’s headache passed, although his body still ached, and they stuck on a movie which neither of them were particularly paying attention to.

Akaashi was happy about that, he didn’t really want to do much talking, but of course, talking had to be done.

“Why did you drink so much last night?” Kuroo asked, turning his head away from the TV to look at Akaashi.

The younger was curled up in the corner of the couch, the other end to Kuroo, wrapped in a blanket with a cup of coffee steaming in his hands. He really hoped he could avoid that question, but apparently not, “I just did.”

Kuroo frowned, “That’s a bit of a vague answer.”

“How did you get here so quickly?” Akaashi asked instead of elaborating on his own answer.

“I- I stayed at somebody’s last night.” Kuroo said, scratching the back of his head, “Which actually reminds me... We need to talk about- well, what I’m trying to say is that this _thing_ that we have going on? It needs to stop, now.”

Akaashi knew it was coming, but it still hurt him anyway. He didn’t want it to end, not at all, but Kuroo obviously did, “Why?” he asked, not wanting to know the answer, despite having a pretty good idea why.

“I met someone, last night.”

Akaashi closed his eyes. _Don’t start crying. Not now!_ “Tsukishima, right?” he asked. _Don’t say that! That’s just going to open up a can of worms! You idiot!_ He thought, straight after saying that.

Kuroo’s eyes widened, “You- you know?”

Akaashi stared forward and didn’t bother to clarify that, yes, he did already know. He wasn’t aware of _why_ he said what he did next, but it was probably best out in the open anyway, no matter what the consequences. “I slept with Bokuto last night.”

Kuroo’s jaw hit the ground, “ _What?”_

“Bokuto.” Akaashi repeated, “I slept with him last night. Which is why I can’t walk this morning and had you come over.”

Kuroo looked a mixture of disgusted and angry and Akaashi wasn’t sure which one he’d prefer. “Did he... did he _hurt_ you?”

Akaashi almost laughed, “God no!” he said, a slight smile on his face, but his smile faded away as he looked up at Kuroo. His eyes were intense and Kuroo was actually a little confused. Akaashi blinked, “You did though.”

“M-me?!” Kuroo pointed towards himself. His eyes wide in shock and his mouth open. His whole facial expression had changed. He was so confused, “I’ve... _I’ve hurt you?”_

He should really stop. But now everything was just flowing and he couldn’t keep it under control. It’s like he released one thing, so they all come tumbling after and they’re impossible to stop, “I slept with Bokuto because I saw you kissing Tsukishima.” Akaashi said, an amused smile painting his lips as if this whole thing was funny to him, even though it wasn’t. “I couldn’t stand watching you make out with somebody else, so I got shitfaced so I’d forget about it but I didn’t. It hurt so much because I wanted to be wanted, to be loved and to be with somebody. Bokuto wanted me, I know he did and I took him into those toilets and messed things up because I was drunk, I was lonely and I was jealous. Of Tsukishima.”

“Why?!” Kuroo snapped, suddenly angry by this turn of events, “Why does anything I do with anybody else have anything to do with you?!”

“Because I’m in love with you!” Akaashi shouted. His hands flew to his mouth the moment he was finished, and his eyes immediately started filling with uncontrollable tears. He didn’t even want to look at the horrified expression Kuroo had, so he screwed his eyes shut and told himself not to open them again.

Kuroo was completely still, his eyes wider than before and he was staring directly at Akaashi. He tore his eyes away and looked downwards, or anywhere else because that was clearly not what was meant to happen. Kuroo was silent for about 3 more minutes, before his hands started shaking and he couldn’t bear to watch Akaashi cry like that, “I’m sorry.” He said, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” He said over and over again.

Akaashi opened his eyes, and glanced over at Kuroo, who was staring at his hands as they shook. “Why are you apologising?” he asked.

“I’ve never... for not... I-” Kuroo tried, “I never made you feel like you can talk to me about stuff. You know, you bottle stuff up and I’ve been a terrible friend who you can’t open up to.”

“Kuroo that isn’t what this is about!” Akaashi insisted, “I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. I know that you don’t love me back, and I know that you never wanted anything out this, it’s my own fault for taking it too far.”

“I should’ve known!” Kuroo snapped, slamming his hands on the coffee table, “I should’ve known that something like this would happen, that you weren’t okay with it but I _didn’t_ and now it’s all coming back in my face!”

Akaashi winced at Kuroo’s harsh voice, “This isn’t your fault!” he snapped back, “ _I’m_ the one who took things too far, _I’m_ the one who used somebody else, _I_ was the one being selfish! I took advantage of how kind Bokuto was, how he genuinely liked me, and he probably won’t ever forgive me for that.”

“AND ALL OF THAT IS BECAUSE OF ME!” Kuroo roared.

Akaashi flinched, curling up further into his corner, pulling the blanket further around him and now this time, he just cried. And cried, and cried and cried because he couldn’t take it anymore. There was too much arguing, too much shouting and he already hurt so badly none of it did anything to improve that.

Kuroo stopped what he was doing and looked up at Akaashi. He unclenched his fists and sighed, “Akaashi... I didn’t mean to raise my voice like that. I’m sorry.”

“S-stop a-apologising.” Akaashi said in-between sobs, “J-just stop!”

“Okay, okay, okay...” Kuroo said soothingly, moving over to Akaashi’s side and wrapping his arms around him for a hug. It may have been totally inappropriate considering what he was just told, but Akaashi didn’t have any objections. Kuroo rested his chin on Akaashi’s head and closed his eyes. _Man_ this was going to be difficult.

\---

They stayed like that for a while, Akaashi crying in Kuroo’s arms whilst the older rubbed his back comfortingly. Then Akaashi had stopped crying, and pushed his way out of Kuroo’s arms, “You need to tell me for sure.” He said, his voice was quiet and empty.

Kuroo blinked, “Tell you what?”

“That you don’t love me the way I love you.” Akaashi replied, “That way I can actually find a way to get over it.”

Kuroo swallowed, he knew this was coming, but still, he didn’t expect Akaashi to be so forward about it, “Okay...” he said, turning to face him properly, “Akaashi, of course, I love you but it’s purely platonic. I- I don’t have romantic feelings for you, I’m still asking to break this thing off, and I’ve met somebody.”

Akaashi closed his eyes, he saw it coming but it still stung. As if there was a small chance Kuroo might actually tell him he loves him back. But of course not. He managed to smile slightly, “Thank-you.”

“Any time.” Kuroo smiled, resulting in making Akaashi smile properly.

“C-can I kiss you?” Akaashi asked; his voice hopeful. He was looking at Kuroo with expectant eyes, ones which could only make him huff a small laugh.

Kuroo didn’t say anything, but he was okay with it, and leaned in and pressed his lips against Akaashi’s.

There was no heat in the kiss, unlike their other ones; it was just... nice, knowing that it wasn’t going to lead anywhere else but this. Akaashi sighed contently to himself, moving his lips against Kuroo’s in a steady rhythm. He’d gotten so used to kissing Kuroo it came so naturally to him.

Reluctantly, he pulled away and smiled. He leaned back against the back of the couch and sighed, “So what did you see in _‘Bored 100% of the time serious faced Tsukishima?’”_

Kuroo snorted, leaning back himself and propping his feet up on the coffee table, and began telling the dramatic story of how he spotted Tsukishima underneath a spotlight. Akaashi had a pool of jealously in his stomach, but he was happy for Kuroo, happy that he’d actually found somebody he liked. Akaashi just needed to get to that stage as well, even if he didn’t have a starting point yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay now you see why it was hard for me to write!   
> What's going to happen between Akaashi and Bokuto now...? Also I really like how I wrote Kuroo in this chapter, like how he was kind of speaking in a protective and blaming himself kind of way for the benefit of Akaashi not feeling like shit about his feelings... you know what I mean?
> 
> Anyway, I really hope you liked it, and let me know what you think in the comments below? Thank-you for reading, and look out for the next update!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Because of the incredible support I've been getting for this fic, I've posted a chapter early for you guys! Honestly, though, some of the comments I've been getting are making me cry happy tears because I never expected this kind of response for it, and I'm absolutely thrilled you guys are enjoying it!
> 
> However, although it's a happy moment with an early chapter, the happy moments don't continue in the story, so if you're prone to tears, grab a box of tissues now! But, in this chapter we get introduced to a couple new characters (Daichi and Yukie) so look forward to that at least! 
> 
> May the Christmas festivities begin!

The last day Akaashi had at work before the Christmas holiday was a half day, so he didn’t need to worry about going in and doing a whole load of work. Not that he had any to do, mind.

He was a bit wary of seeing Bokuto again, but he knew that it was better to just talk it out and move past it, that was the only way anyway.

When he got to his office, there were people around talking happily and sipping their cups of coffee. Most people had been wearing their Christmas jumpers over their suit shirts, and Oikawa’s was bright red and a UFO and a Christmas tree on it. Akaashi wasn’t sure how the UFO fitted into it at all.

He was setting things out on his desk for the final time that year when he heard a voice call his name. It was quieter than usual, but he still knew who it was.

“Morning, Bokuto.”

“Morning!”Bokuto smiled, he looked really happy, “How was your weekend?”

Akaashi nodded, “It was good. A lot of free time.”

Bokuto nodded knowingly and then there was an awkward silence between them. The elephant in the room and they both know what it was. “Actually, Bokuto can I talk to you a sec?”

Bokuto was a bit shocked, but nodded and they walked to the far end of the office where there were less people, “What’s up?”

“I think we both know what’s up...” Akaashi began, “About Friday night.”

“Yeah...”

“Firstly I would just like to apologise. I was drunk and I wasn’t thinking straight and I shouldn’t have taken advantage of the fact you were also drinking and... I’m just, I’m sorry.”

Bokuto stared at him. _Why is he apologising? I loved it; I don’t have any complaints about it at all!_ He thought. “Uhm- yeah! Me too, I’m uh, I’m sorry as well, I should’ve seen how drunk you were and I’m in the wrong too so... don’t worry about it.” He said instead, waving his hand around.

“I’m glad.” Akaashi said, “It was just a mistake, that’s all.”

“R-right...” Bokuto replied. He didn’t think it was a mistake at all. He assumed Akaashi liked him back but now there was all this apologising and he was getting really confused. “S-so are you going back home for Christmas?” he asked, desperate for the conversation to change subject.

Akaashi seemed happy with the topic change and smiled, “No, not this year. I was meant to but couldn’t afford it. I’m actually going to Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s this year, they invited me and Kuroo and... a couple people from another department. I know Tsukishima is going back to Miyagi, I think Konoha will be there and Suga is bringing his husband, Daichi... Uh- what about you, are you going home?”

“No, actually I’m- I’m uh...” Bokuto trailed off and Akaashi swallowed. Bokuto didn’t have anybody to spend Christmas with, and there Akaashi was; blabbing on about how all of them are going to Oikawa’s for Christmas and Bokuto wasn’t invited.

He wasn’t sure if it was a good idea or not, but it probably wasn’t, but he asked anyway, “It’s not fair for you to be on your own on Christmas day. I’ll ask Oikawa if it’s okay for you to come to his and Iwaizumi’s, I’m sure he’ll say yes!”

Bokuto was beaming, although he tried to remain calm, “Really? I won’t be intruding?”

“Of course not! It’s colleagues, and partners and friends and stuff. Of course you’re welcome!” Akaashi answered. He was pretty sure Oikawa would be fine with it as well.

\---

Akaashi was stood outside Oikawa’s front door, a bottle of wine in one hand, a bag of various gifts in the other. Kuroo was stood next to him, ready to knock on the door.

Akaashi hadn’t gotten much sleep the night before. He was tossing and turning and all he could think about was the possible ways this day could go terribly bad. All the possible consequences because he had invited Bokuto over as well, every single thing, like a risk assessment.

He was holding the bag so tightly his finger nails were leaving marks in his palm, but he couldn’t feel it, or hear the knocking on the door because his mind was still clouded. It was only when Oikawa opened the door did he snap out of it and back to reality.

“Merry Christmas!” Oikawa cheered, his arms were open and he was showing off his Christmas jumper. It was the same one as he wore at the office, and this time he was also wearing a Santa hat.

Kuroo grinned, “Merry Christmas to you too, nice jumper.” He pointed at Oikawa, who just smiled even more and agreed with him. Kuroo wasn’t really one for tacky Christmas jumpers, he would wear one which maybe had a snowman on it, but he wasn’t really all about bright and in your face ones; he still wanted to look fashionable.

Akaashi wasn’t that big a fan of flamboyant jumpers either, but Christmas was an exception, and today he was wearing a red one with various Christmas decorations printed on it. Oikawa showed his approval.

“Come on in! Everybody’s here already and Iwa-chan’s almost done with the turkey.” He said, gesturing them inside the house and pushing them through to the dining room/kitchen area where everybody already was. Iwaizumi was running around the kitchen, opening the oven and the cupboards trying to find different things, and Oikawa went to help him, Daichi and Suga were sat at the bar with Bokuto, chatting about something or other, and Konoha was leaning on the island, watching Iwaizumi rush about, he was with somebody though, Akaashi only assumed it was his girlfriend.

Bokuto’s jumper was... questionable. The front of it was split into four squares, each showing a different Christmassy scene. One was a tree, another was snow... you get the picture. Akaashi couldn’t stare at it for too long without giving himself a headache.

The house was nicely decorated, with strings of tinsel adorning the coving and odd bits and bobs lining shelves and tables. The living room was the most impressive, Akaashi poked his head round the door when he walked past into the kitchen and his eyes widened. A large Christmas tree in the corner was covered with matching decorations and lights, finished off with a beautiful gold star on the top. Underneath it was rows of gifts, all shapes and sizes in different brightly coloured paper. There was a nice Christmassy smell through the house as well, one full of roast dinner and the crackling fire and different scented candles. It was cosy.

Akaashi watched Oikawa and Iwaizumi for a moment, smiling as he saw Oikawa run to the end of the counter and come back to Iwaizumi’s side, holding a piece of mistletoe above their heads, hinting at his fiancé with small kissing noises. Iwaizumi pretended to look annoyed, but Akaashi caught the blush on his cheeks and he turned his head and kissed Oikawa’s lips.

“Hi!” Kuroo called, “Merry Christmas!”

There was a chorus of ‘Merry Christmas’ back in his direction and he happily went over to talk to Suga, Daichi and Bokuto, so Akaashi decided to go talk to Konoha. Because they weren’t in the same department and didn’t see each other much, it was a little awkward, but he was good friends with Oikawa so Akaashi had to assume he was cool.

“Akaashi, this is my girlfriend, Yukie, this is our first Christmas together.” Konoha said. Akaashi smiled at Yukie and shook her hand politely. They then went on to talk about various Christmas things and work stuff.

Akaashi hadn’t once thought about going over to talk to Bokuto, but he could feel his eyes on him every now and then, and it was incredibly distracting.

“Dinner’s ready!” Oikawa called. Everybody sounded happy and they all went and sat around the table. Oikawa poured people’s wine as Iwaizumi carved the turkey and put food on people’s plates. Akaashi was happy that he was sat the other end of the table to Bokuto; he didn’t know how awkward things would be just yet and didn’t particularly want to test it in front of everybody. He was sandwiched between Kuroo and Yukie, who were chatting over him happily.

There was a lot of general chit chat, but it went straight over Akaashi’s head, he was pretty sure his name was mentioned a couple of times, but he just stared at his plate and didn’t speak much, in the hope they’d just not even try anymore. Oikawa asked Kuroo how Tsukishima was, and if he was sad because their first Christmas together was spent in different prefectures. Kuroo argued that they weren’t even that official because they were only seeing each other since the 18th, but said yeah it sucked because he really likes him and wanted it to be a good end to the year.

It wasn’t until after dinner, when they were opening gifts that he had to say at least something. He didn’t get much, just a scarf and things like that, but then again he didn’t give much either, something small for each of them. He smiled and thanked those who got him something, then excused himself to go to the bathroom, but that wasn’t where he went.

It was cool outside, the night air flowing through his hair and it was a good way of calming down. It wasn’t exactly hot in Oikawa’s house, but with the pressure of making conversation about an unknown topic bearing down on him, it was bound to feel a little warm.

He was leaning against the wall by the back door, looking out across the garden. Oikawa and Iwaizumi had a nice garden as well. Fountains, a hot tub and a small pool as well as a barbeque pit. He was busy looking around he didn’t even notice the door open.

“It’s nice out tonight, isn’t it?”

Akaashi turned his head to see Kuroo standing the other side of the door, looking out into the darkness, “I guess.”

Kuroo hummed, “Bo was asking if you were okay. I couldn’t give him an answer because I don’t even know. What’s going on with you? You’ve been spacing out all day.”

“I’m fine.” Akaashi breathed, his breath dancing in front of him in the cold air.

Kuroo sighed, “We’re putting a movie on, _Elf_ or something. Just thought I should let you know in case you wanted to watch it.” He said, returning to the warmth of the house.

Akaashi slumped back against the wall and sighed. He should really go back in there, but then he’d have to face people giving him questioning and concerned looks and he wasn’t sure if he could deal with that, especially if they were coming from Bokuto. His legs still had a dull ache in them from the... thing with Bokuto, and every time he walked he was reminded of that mistake, and it was eating away at him because he just felt so guilty because it was so selfish of him.

He poked his head around the door frame and looked back into the living room, where they were all sitting on the couches with mugs of tea or hot chocolate and some of them were even under a blanket. But where did Akaashi fit into all of it? Oikawa and Iwaizumi were snuggled under a blanket together on the loveseat, well, it was more like Iwaizumi sitting normally and Oikawa clinging to him for dear life. Konoha and Yukie were under another blanket, sipping at their drinks and making each other laugh every now and then and Suga and Daichi were being disgustingly cute, squished up together in a large armchair with all their limbs tangled together, and then there was Kuroo and Bokuto.

On the other couch, the two of them were sprawled out across each other like they were best mates. Bokuto’s feet were by Kuroo’s head, and Kuroo’s feet were by Bokuto’s head, and Akaashi couldn’t help but feel jealous and left out. Kuroo was _his_ best friend, not Bokuto’s, _he_ should be the one on the couch with him watching a Christmas movie, not anybody else. But there was nowhere else for him to sit, there was maybe room on the same couch as Yukie and Konoha, but he would only feel awkward because they were clearly more interested in making suggestions to each other than watching the film.

But... Oikawa made an effort, and it wasn’t fair to not join in just because he was afraid people might be _worried about him._ That was probably an awful excuse anyway. With a deep breath, Akaashi went back into the house, and immediately all eyes were on him, apart from Iwaizumi’s, because he was too engrossed in the movie. “Akaashi!” Bokuto smiled, he patted the seat in between him and Kuroo and waved his hand for him to come join, “You didn’t miss much, come sit.”

Akaashi swallowed. Bokuto looked... unfazed. Was he not awkward as well? Did he not feel the elephant which was still in the room, suffocating Akaashi immensely? Kuroo must’ve noticed Akaashi’s distress, because he threw himself into the middle seat and stared at Bokuto, saying, “Trying to get rid of me that easily, huh?” and then Bokuto smiled and gave Kuroo a noogie.

Akaashi was thankful to Kuroo for doing that, and as he sat down next to him, just gave him a small smile and pulled a blanket up over his legs. But, if he thought the movie would be easy to watch and he’d get over it, he was wrong.

\---

By the end of the movie, Akaashi was sweating profusely. The blanket was long discarded on the floor and he kept finding himself pulling his jumper away from his neck, waving his hand around to create some breeze. Kuroo gave him a worried look, but he just brushed it off. He was _fine._

Oikawa jumped up, asking people if they wanted a drink or if they were hungry, then went into the kitchen to get some snacks after Yukie put up her hand and declared she could _“Kill for some sweet rolls right now!”_

Akaashi followed him, needing to get away from all the people and hoping that if he ran his hands under a cold tap he’d be okay.

“You alright over there?” Oikawa asked, getting a plate out of one of the cupboards.

Akaashi swallowed, he wasn’t even that sure anymore, “I’ll be fine.”

“Look, Akaashi, I don’t want to intrude but something seems-”

“I’m fine. It was just really hot in there, that’s all.” Akaashi replied, walking over to the sink and turning the cold tap on. Oikawa didn’t buy it, but sighed and closed the cupboard; he headed to another cupboard to get some food and then left again, leaving Akaashi on his own. He leant on the counter with his head over the sink, his breathing was out of control and he needed to calm down fast.

But of course, when you’re not feeling 100%, people are bound to be worried and come see if you’re okay. One of those people being Bokuto.

“Heard you felt a little hot earlier. Yeah, it was quite warm in there with the fire and the blankets and drinks and stuff.” He said, propping himself up on the island.

“What do you want?” Akaashi asked. It came out a bit harsher than he intended, but Bokuto didn’t seem to mind.

“I just wanted to make sure you weren’t in danger of fainting or anything. Or getting ill, or a fever...” Bokuto replied, fiddling with his fingers, “Also there was something else I want to say, and I’m glad we’re alone now.”

Oh no. Not this, anything but this. Akaashi’s grip on the end of the sink tightened, and he could see his turning an ugly shade of white. “What is it?” he said. That was surely the last thing he should’ve said if he wanted to _avoid_ this conversation.

“Look the other night at the party... I... I didn’t think it was a mistake, I thought it was incredible and I know we were both drunk but... Are you telling me that you didn’t think that there was at least- I don’t know, something _more_ to it than just sex?”

This was bad. The guilt was eating away at him like he was its lunch. The guilt of using him, then lying to him about it, and then brushing him off and ignoring him for the entire day because he was too selfish to just admit it and be straight with him. He didn’t want to hurt Bokuto, not ever. “I told you. It was my mistake; you don’t need to think anything of it.”

“Yes but- Akaashi as you already know, I’m crazy about you, and there is-”

“Bokuto please! There isn’t anything that I regret more than that night, trust me! I- I don’t feel the same as you, and I’m sorry, I was _drunk_ and did a bad thing!” Akaashi insisted.

“I know that, but-”

“I’m sorry... but I- I already like somebody else, I’m- I’m interesting in-”

Bokuto’s hands started to shake, “Your sister told me you weren’t seeing anybody...” he trailed off.

“But that doesn’t mean I’m not in love with anybody!” Akaashi cried.

Bokuto’s eyes widened, he stared at Akaashi with gold eyes, “W- _what?”_

There it was again. The thing Akaashi does when he starts talking and then can’t shut up because he unleashed something and then it all starts happening at once. It was happening again. “I do _not_ have feelings for you! At all! I only had sex with you because I was pissed off!”

Bokuto looked sad. Really, _really_ sad. His head was slightly dropped and his lips were trembling. It hurt him so badly.

But Akaashi didn’t notice that, and he just carried on, bashing his way through like a monster truck, “I’m in love with Kuroo. Yup, my best friend, we had a kind of, I don’t know, friends with benefits thing going on. Yeah! I was _fucking_ my best friend and fell for him so fucking hard and it sucks because I saw him making out with Tsukishima at the Christmas party, and the only reason I had sex with you was because I was mad at him, not because I like you! Did you really think I’d be interested in you? Of course not! You’re annoying, in my face, persistent and just... infuriating.” He snapped. “It was the last resort, I used you, for myself, and you think that’s a good thing? What the fuck is wrong with you?”

 _“WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME?!”_ Bokuto shouted back, taking Akaashi by surprise, “How dare you even say that. There is nothing wrong with me because I generally thought we had something, and then _you_ just go and use it to your advantage because the person you like likes somebody else. That is such a _dick_ move, and I can’t believe it was done by you, of all people.”

“I have my reasons! You know them!” Akaashi shouted, “Don’t go thinking that you’re a victim here, because I’m as much of one as you are!”

Bokuto brushed him off and shook his head, huffing a laugh. When he looked up his eyes were piercing, “You know, Akaashi. Out of all the people I would’ve thought to become a complete _asshole,_ I never expected _you_ to come out on top.”

Before Akaashi could even think of something to say in return, Bokuto had left the kitchen, and the house apparently, after the loud bang of the door and the shuffle in the living room of Oikawa, wrapped in a blanket, poking his head out into the hallway, visible to Akaashi from the kitchen.

Akaashi was in tears, he wasn’t even aware of when he started crying, but he was, in the kitchen, of somebody else’s really nice and modern and expensive house. The others were sat in complete silence in the living room, after overhearing _everything_ ; from Bokuto trying to show Akaashi his feelings, right to Akaashi declaring his bedroom activities with Kuroo.

Speaking of Kuroo, all eyes were trained on him in the other room, mouths open slightly in shock. Kuroo himself just sat there looking down at the carpet, what was he supposed to say to that? He already knew. Well, so did Oikawa and Iwaizumi, by extension, but that didn’t mean Konoha or Yukie knew, but it didn’t exactly need to be shouted all over the bloody house. And hell, now Daichi and Suga knew and they just looked absolutely stunned.

Kuroo swallowed before looking up at the faces staring back at him, “I uh- I already knew that-” he hesitated, figuring these people didn’t need to know the details, so he stood up, his face turning an embarrassing shade of red, “I’m going to go make sure he’s alright.”

Nobody said anything, but just watched him walk out and into the kitchen. When he got to the kitchen however, Akaashi wasn’t in there. “Akaashi?” he called out lightly, but there was no reply, not even a small sound. Shit.

He rushed back into the living room, despite feeling incredibly awkward with all of these people now knowing... well, what they knew, but Akaashi was gone and they needed to know. “Um.” He said, attention falling back onto him, “Akaashi’s gone.”

“What?!” Oikawa gasped.

“He’s... he’s not in there and he might’ve gone home but I-”

“You need to go after him!” Yukie interrupted. It was the first thing she’d said in a while, actually.

“Yukie...” Konoha said softly, putting a hand on her shoulder which she just shrugged off.

Kuroo swallowed, “I uh- I don’t know if that’s a good-”

“Kuroo listen to me. I don’t know you that well, and maybe it’s a little weird hearing it from somebody that you just met this morning, but...” she paused, “What you and Akaashi do behind closed doors is up to you, your private life is your private life and nobody here is going to judge you for that. But, whether you’re fucking him or not, he said himself, you’re _best friends._ And best friends should be there for each other, especially in times like this.”

“Yukie’s right...” Oikawa said, “You need to go find him.”

Kuroo’s breathing wasn’t steady, but he looked around the group and saw that they were all nodding at him, telling him to go find Akaashi without actually saying the words. “A-alright...” he said, finally.

He said some goodbyes before leaving, and then thought about all the possible places Akaashi could be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Firstly. I am so sorry!
> 
> Secondly, thanks so much for reading and despite the heartbreak, I still hoped that you liked it! :3  
> Don't be too hurt over what happened between the two of them; it does get better, I promise, it's just in order for them to get to that stage, things kind of have to go to shit... 
> 
> Anyway! Thanks again for reading and your continuous support, please look out for the next chapter, and enjoy the rest of your day! <3


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know how I feel about this chapter, but oh well, let me know what you think anyway!  
> Also, I have mentioned it in a few replies to comments, but in case you haven't seen those, there might be some delay on getting future chapter uploaded. Although I'm pretty much done with my exams now and don't have to worry about school, I'm using that time to go back over the story and I've actually noticed some things which need changing.  
> There is no definite delay, but if I miss a few days or so please don't worry because I'm just re-writing it to make it better for you guys :)
> 
> Enjoy chapter 8 though!

Akaashi was sitting on his kitchen floor, leaning against the cabinet in a ball with a bottle of wine in his hand. It was the other bottle he was meant to take over to Oikawa’s, but decided they’d have too many bottles, so left it behind. Right now it was working to his advantage. He was taking sips from the bottle frequently, and was down to half of it already.

His vision was blurry and his head throbbed. It was not a good night. He’d told everybody his most private things, yelled at Bokuto and broke his heart in the process, and decided going home and getting drunk was the best medicine. Well, actually, the alcohol did help. But it was all bringing back memories from the Christmas party, and that was not a place he wanted to go back to.

Akaashi had been crying from the moment he weakly stumbled out of Oikawa’s house, a second or so before Bokuto had in the hope to catch up to him, but when he finally got outside the older was nowhere to be seen. He headed home, his mind dead set on crying in a corner until somebody found him the next morning, wallowing in his own pit of tears and alcohol. Which was actually how he was found.

Kuroo opened the door to his apartment; he’d been searching for a while and then just decided that Akaashi had probably just gone home. When he opened the door, it was dark inside, but he could hear faint sobs coming from the kitchen and knew that Akaashi was there.

He rounded the corner and flipped the living room light switch on, giving himself enough light to go into the kitchen without it being too bright and overbearing on Akaashi. He froze at the doorway, looking down at the small figure in the corner, gripping a pretty much empty wine bottle in his hand with tears streaming down his face. Kuroo could tell that he was pretty drunk, so there was no way he could get any logical response from him until the morning, all he could do right now was be there for him.

He walked over slowly, and crouched down in front of him, “Found you.” He smiled, “I was pretty worried back there.”

Akaashi grinned, it was lopsided, and his eyes were closing. “Found you too!”

Kuroo grimaced, his breath stank and it was getting all up in his face, “Want to go to bed?”

Akaashi shook his head lazily, “I found you!” he repeated. Kuroo just nodded.

Akaashi swayed a bit before leaning in real close and pressing his lips against Kuroo’s, Kuroo froze for a minute before pushing Akaashi away, “No, Akaashi... we can’t do that.”

The other pouted, “Why?” he said, leaning in again, but this time Kuroo was fast enough to put his hand in the way.

“Because I’m seeing somebody now.” He replied.

“Yeah... me!”

“No...” Kuroo shook his head, “Not you... Tsukishima, remember?”

Kuroo hated the expression on Akaashi’s face after he said that. It was a real sad, let down and heartbroken expression and the younger just sighed painfully, “Where’s Bokuto?”

Kuroo raised his eyebrows, “He had to go.”

Akaashi sniffed, tears pricking at his eyes, “I want to see him! Take me to see him!” he tried getting up but Kuroo just pushed him back down.

“You’re not leaving this apartment until you’re sober... You hear me?”

Akaashi stared up at him, eyes watery and nose running. He pouted a couple more times and swayed, landing his head on Kuroo’s chest and putting his hands next to his face. Kuroo looked down at him, blinking a couple of times. Akaashi was gripping his shirt so tight he felt like it’d rip if he tried pulling away. It gave Kuroo the impression that Akaashi didn’t want to lose him like he thought he’d lost Bokuto, like if he held him as tight as he could then he wouldn’t get away.  
He was crying into the material but Kuroo didn’t really care, he lifted a hand and put in on Akaashi’s head, his fingers gently running through his hair and down his neck before resting across his shoulders. They stayed like that for a long time.

\---

When Akaashi woke up again, he was in bed, in just some shorts and the cover tucked right under his chin. He didn’t have a headache, surprisingly, but his body felt like lead and he didn’t even dare to try and move.

“Morning.”

Akaashi moved his head to the side and blinked at Kuroo, who was leaning against his doorframe with a cup of coffee in his hand. He mumbled a good morning and closed his eyes again.

“I brought you come coffee.” Kuroo said, coming in and putting the mug on Akaashi’s nightstand. “Also, Oikawa dropped off the presents you left at his last night, the ones you left behind when you ran off.”

Akaashi opened and eye and looked at his friend, who was now standing right next to the bed. “Last night..?”

“Yeah...” Kuroo replied, “Christmas day... do you not remember what happened?”

Akaashi blinked again, searching his mind for any clues to remind himself about what might have happened. He remembered arriving, greeting people and then eating. Watching a movie, going to the kitchen, and... And... Realisation hit him like a bulldozer. “Oh my God.”

Kuroo nodded, “You remember?”

“He hates me... He _hates_ me! The way- the way he looked at me with disgust and anger and disappointment and- and- he hates me!” Akaashi blurted, suddenly shooting up in bed like he didn’t just feel like he weighed over 1000 pounds a minute ago. His hands were shaking.

Kuroo sat down next to him and looked him in the eye, “He doesn’t hate you. He’s probably confused.”

“Yeah right!” Akaashi spat, “You weren’t there, so you didn’t see his face. I fucking broke his heart, he’s _bound_ to hate me.”

The older stared at him with disbelief. It was so unlike Akaashi to react like that, so... hysterical. “Would you just calm down and think about it _rationally._ ”

“NO!” Akaashi snapped, “Why should I when either way I think about it it’s going to have the same conclusion!”

_Slap._

Akaashi was turned away from his friend, his hand came up to his cheek and it stung, like a million little pins pricking his cheek. His eyes were tearing up, and his bottom lip was trembling. Finally, he looked back up at Kuroo, who looked pissed.

“Would you pull yourself together!” he snapped, “This is not how the Akaashi I know would think about things! You’re acting irrationally and stupidly, so just snap out of it!”

Akaashi tore his eyes away again, the pain in his cheek coming back, “Y-you slapped me.” He mumbled.

“I’m sorry.” Kuroo replied, looking down at the bed, “There was probably a better way to get the message across. But- but I’m fed up of watching you get to the stage where you’re crying. I hate seeing you cry and you’ve done enough of it these past few days.”

Akaashi wiped at his eyes and sniffed, “I- I’m... You’re right.”

“Wha-”

“I have been acting so stupidly recently and... you were right to slap me.” Akaashi interrupted, “So much is going on though, and it’s pretty stressful.”

Kuroo squeezed his thigh, “I know, but I’m here for you, okay?”

The younger nodded, “Yeah.”

They caught each other’s gazes for a moment, and it held. Kuroo’s hand was still on Akaashi’s thigh, and Akaashi was seriously considering putting his hand on Kuroo’s thigh as well. Kuroo’s words kept ringing round his head, _I’m here for you. I’m here for you._ And although it wasn’t in the way he meant, Akaashi still wanted to find out. Another one of his stupid actions, but oh well.

He surged forward, hands wrapping round Kuroo’s neck to keep his head still, and lips meeting his in a rough and sudden kiss. What surprised Akaashi the most was that Kuroo didn’t move away, instead, he reciprocated. It was familiar to Kuroo, reminding him of the night before and how a part of him regretted pushing Akaashi away, because it was just so... nice and comforting and it felt natural to him.

Akaashi’s nails were digging into the back of Kuroo’s neck as he gripped him tighter and he pressed harder. Kuroo’s hands snaked from his thighs to his waist, and held him firmly in place, like an anchor. When Akaashi opened his mouth to breathe, Kuroo dove his tongue in and earned himself a surprised gasp, which he secretly adored. Their tongues were brushing against each other almost lewdly, and the noises that they were making were only suitable for the bedroom, good thing they actually were in a bedroom.

Kuroo began to push Akaashi back down on the bed, and Akaashi pulled Kuroo down with him, until his back hit the mattress and Kuroo’s hands were braced either side of his head, like a cage. During this, their lips were still locked.

Akaashi’s hands roamed down Kuroo’s body and started tugging at his shirt, shifting it up his torso until it was around his shoulders, ready to be discarded all together. There was so much heat to the kiss, not like their ‘parting kiss’ which was just a friendly goodbye kiss, this one was like when they were still... you know... Akaashi loved it, the intensity, the heat and the passion and it reminded him of when times were simpler, and he couldn’t get enough.

“Off.” He mumbled between a kiss, tugging at Kuroo’s shirt to get his intention across. Kuroo happily complied, breaking the kiss for a millisecond to rid his shirt and chuck it carelessly across the room, before latching onto Akaashi’s bottom lip and tugging. He was thankful that he was just wearing shorts and didn’t have to pause to take his shirt off.

His hands were back around Kuroo’s neck and shoulders as the taller moved downwards to kiss and suck as his jaw and neck. Akaashi’s eyes were closed and his head was thrown back to give Kuroo full access; he was letting out small breaths of air and squirming beneath the other.

Akaashi’s torso was like a blank canvas, one which Kuroo had left many proud marks on before, so he had no hesitation doing it again. He left a line of red marks down his chest and to his navel, although making sure they didn’t leave too much of a bruise. By the time he was pressing kisses along the hem of Akaashi’s shorts, he could tell that there was an obvious tent in them. He gave a smug grin, completely forgetting the big picture, and hooked a finger inside the hem and tugged, freeing Akaashi from restriction. Akaashi moaned, head tipping back further and his hips jerking up, nails dragging across the expanse of Kuroo’s shoulders.  

Akaashi opened his eyes and watched as Kuroo, towering above him on his knees, fumbled with his belt.

Kuroo managed to undo the buckle and he slipped it out of the loops, tossing it to the side and then worked on his button and zip, but when he freed them, he froze. He was not moving at all, his hands were frozen, hovering just above his zip and he was holding his breath, eyes wide as he stared down at Akaashi. Akaashi was staring back.

Kuroo’s mind was screaming. _What am I doing?! This is no way to be a supportive friend! This is so bad. I’m meant to be seeing somebody! I’m leading him on, giving him stupid signals and I was the one who called him irrational?!_

“K-Kuroo...” Akaashi whispered, as if speaking too loud would scare him off. “Kuroo?”

Kuroo mentally shook his head, “I’m- I’m s-sorry.”

“It’s fine-”

“No it’s not.” Kuroo interrupted, “It’s... it’s not.” He shifted backwards and sat on the end of the bed, putting his head in his hands. Akaashi moved above him, pulling his shorts back up. “Akaashi that was really wrong of me, and I’m so sorry.” He said, “I’m _seeing_ somebody, you know? And you’re in a pretty bad place and I’m sure that this was probably the worst thing I could’ve done.”

“I was the one who initiated it, Kuroo.” Akaashi said, pulling the duvet up to his chin, trying to hide the marks on his chest, otherwise he’d definitely blush.

“But it’s not like I stopped you, did I? I let you kiss me and I was so out of it I was prepared to... to _fuck_ you, Akaashi.”

Akaashi’s mouth opened slightly, but he didn’t say anything else and watched Kuroo rub his face with a frustrated sigh, “I’m... I’m really embarrassed right now. I lectured you about not thinking and there I was, undoing my jeans with a naked and probably really confused friend underneath me. Not what a best friend should do, right?”

Akaashi huffed a laugh, a quiet one, “It’s okay, I... A part of me wanted it to happen, despite you seeing somebody, and that shows my selfish side again.”

Kuroo looked over at him and smiled gently, before standing and moving to pick up his discarded articles of clothing. He pulled his shirt back on and threaded his belt back through the belt loops. “I’ve actually gotta get home. But, please don’t let this end awkwardly.”

Akaashi nodded, “No way. Get home, and don’t be a stranger!” he smiled.

Kuroo gave him a thumbs up and headed to the door, “Probably see you later.”

\---

Kuroo was scuffing his shoes along the pavement as he walked. He didn’t really know where he was going, he didn’t really feel like going home and just made up that excuse so he could get out of there before he said something stupid. Maybe the coffee shop? He quite fancied one after making one for Akaashi.

When he arrived at the shop he sat at a table by the window and watched the people go past with his chin resting in his hand. Everybody else’s life seemed so much easier and simpler. There was a couple across the road holding hands and pointing out various things along the way, they looked really happy and it made Kuroo’s chest tighten. He felt like that when he was with Tsukishima. Granted, he’d only really been with the guy twice and he wouldn’t see him again until he got back from Miyagi, but there was something between them and he knew for sure that he’d get a date out of the guy when he returned to Tokyo.

The waitress came over with his cup and he smiled at her, before picking it up and taking a sip. It was hot, but that went straight over his head. The coffee shop wasn’t very busy, and he was thankful for that. He needed a quiet space to think things over, what he had with Akaashi couldn’t carry on if he was to continue seeing Tsukishima, but then again there was a part of him which knew that if he ended things with Akaashi then he’d probably regret it somewhere down the line.

He glanced briefly over to the counter when he heard the bell above the door ring, but his eyes widened as he registered who had just walked in. Broad shoulders, buff arms and a flash of silver and black hair. There was no doubt about it that it was Bokuto. 

 _Shit. Should I talk to him? Get him to reason with this whole ordeal, or will he just get pissed off at me?_ Kuroo didn’t realise that whilst he was doing all of this thinking, he was already out of his seat and heading towards the other. _Well damn... Too late now._

“B-Bokuto?” he asked, tapping him on the shoulder.

Bokuto turned around, his eyes widened and his expression turned ugly, he quickly turned back around, “I have nothing to say to you.”

 _So I guess he’s gonna get pissed at me._ “Look, man, I know we didn’t leave on the best of terms last time but can we just _talk?”_

Bokuto was still faced the other way, “Like I said, I have nothing to say to you. Did you not hear me or something?”

“No I did...” Kuroo replied, “But can you hear me out? You may not have anything to say but I do... Can you just listen?”

Bokuto faced him now, his eyes were accusing but Kuroo paid them no attention, instead intent on finding out his answer. Eventually, Bokuto sighed and picked up his coffee which was on the counter waiting for him, “Fine. I have to be somewhere in 5 minutes though, so make it quick.” By that, Bokuto meant he was actually going to be going straight home to wallow on his own without any questions asked. He could really do without this, but something about Kuroo’s serious tone made him want to stay and listen.

Kuroo’s whole face brightened up and he grinned, “Awesome. Thank-you, I have a table over here so...” he thrusted his thumb towards the window and Bokuto followed him back, taking a seat opposite him and setting his cup down.

“Thank-you.” Kuroo said again.

“Uh huh.” Was all the reply he got.

The taller scratched the back of his head and looked out the window for a second, “Firstly, I hope we’re not on each other’s bad sides. I really hit it off with you yesterday and I would like it if we were friends.”

Bokuto squinted at him, as if he didn’t quite believe he just said that, “As much as I would like to deny it right now... I’d like that too.”

Kuroo smiled, “Cool...” he said, “Also, we need to talk about what happened with Akaashi. There are a few things that I need to clear up.”

“I’m not interested in hearing whatever excuse he may have. What he did was totally out of order.”

“You’re right!” Kuroo replied quickly, almost scaring Bokuto, “It was _totally_ wrong, and I’ve already talked to him about it, kinda... but there are things that you need to know before you just completely write him off... Please?”

Bokuto let out a long sigh and took a sip of his coffee; he checked the time on his phone and looked back up to Kuroo, “You have three minutes.”

\---

_“I just don’t think he was the right guy, you know?”_

“I suppose...” Akaashi replied. He decided to call Rika and ask about how her Christmas was and if she got anything good, and school and all that, and eventually the topic came to boys and she was telling him that the guy she told him she liked asked her out, but then only did it as a dare anyway. “But you still like him?”

_“I guess. It’s weird though, I do still like him but after doing that to me and humiliating me in front of everybody, there’s no way I’d give him a second chance. It was just awful!”_

Her words made Akaashi stop and think. It was pretty much the same thing he’d done to Bokuto. Bokuto liked him, probably still does, but he humiliated him and yelled at him, it’s the same, so like Rika said, he probably wouldn’t give him another chance.

_“Keiji? You still there?”_

“Y-yeah I’m still here, sorry...”

 _“What are you thinking about? Something on your mind?”_ His sister asked.

Akaashi sighed; he really didn’t want to go into detail about it, especially over the phone, “It’s nothing.”

 _“Come on!”_ was the reply, _“I know when something’s bothering my brother! Spill!”_

He was at his apartment alone, Kuroo had left and most likely wasn’t going to come back today, and he didn’t have plans, so why not? Although he still needed to go through the gifts he got given the day before.

“I’ve uh- I’ve just fucked up... big time.” He said, running a hand over his face with a sigh.

_“Oh yeah? What did you do this time?”_

“It’s not something you want to know too much about, I’m guessing, so I’ll spare you the details but I...” he paused to think of a way to word it which wouldn’t freak his little sister out. The last thing she needed to know was his sex life. “I just- I used somebody and took advantage of the way they felt, and then yelled at them about it... It’s complicated.”

Rika smirked, _“Yeah sounds like it!”_ she laughed. Was she making fun of him? _“In all seriousness, Keiji, you sound like shit and clearly there’s more to this than you’re giving away. However, I’m not going to push because if you say I don’t want to hear it then I’ll believe you. Just... just know that you’ll probably get over it and it’ll work out, ‘kay?”_

Akaashi nodded, not like she could see him though, “Yeah I suppose. What are you up to then? How’s school?”

There was a long, dragged out groan on the other line, and Akaashi couldn’t help but smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, I hope you liked it! Let me know what you think by leaving a comment! I'm trying really hard to finish re-editing the next few chapters for you so I have them out on time, but there are no promises so try to be patient with me :3 Thanks again!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, but here's chapter 9!   
> Due to the changes I've made, I'm not entirely sure this follows the same style that I've been writing in, so if it reads weirdly or anything please let me know because I'm kind of worried about it.
> 
> But anyway! Please enjoy this angst filled chapter!

“It really sucks. I saw him walking down the street and tried to call out to him but he just completely blanked me.” Akaashi said, hands curling around a mug of tea.

Oikawa hummed, “I’m sorry.” He said, “But I understand why, I mean-”

“Don’t say it.” Akaashi cut him off, “I know exactly why he did it, and I deserve it after what I did so you don’t need to apologise.”

Akaashi had missed hours of sleep recently, his nights full of tossing and turning, trying to find a comfortable position but none of them worked. His head was just spinning, reminding him of every expression Bokuto had on his face that day, how he was a happy and cheerful man one minute and a hurt and betrayed mess the next. Akaashi had only himself to blame for that.

“Actually, Akaashi there is something that we need to discuss.” Oikawa said, pulling the younger from his thoughts.

“What’s that?”

“About a day ago, Bokuto came over to our house and asked to speak to Iwa-chan.” Oikawa started.

“Why does that concern me?” Akaashi asked, not seeing any reason why it has to do with him.

Oikawa looked straight at him, and said without hesitation, “He’s leaving the company.”

A thick silence filled the room in an instant, it was almost suffocating. Akaashi felt his heartbeat in his ears. Why was he getting so worked up about it? What Bokuto did was none of his business; he could do whatever he wanted... It wasn’t like they were a couple...

“Why?”

“He spoke to Iwa-chan about joining the pro volleyball team. As he’s on the National team, Bokuto wanted to speak to him about tryouts and practices and stuff. He wants to pursue something he’s always wanted, and apparently only just decided because something just woke up that part of him again.” Oikawa explained.

Akaashi knew exactly what that thing was that woke up his volleyball side. It was the practice with Rika. Akaashi remembered Bokuto telling him how grateful he was to get the chance to play again, and that he really enjoyed it and regretted not continuing with it. But why now? Why suddenly pack up his life at the advertising agency now? But Akaashi already had a pretty good idea why he was leaving now; it was so he wouldn’t have to see him again.

“Are you okay?” Oikawa asked.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Akaashi said slowly, he huffed a laugh, although on the inside he didn’t think anything was amusing. “I’m happy for him.”

Oikawa’s eyebrows shot up; “Really?” he didn’t seem convinced.

“Of course.” Akaashi faked a smile, “I’m over the moon.”

\---

Before Oikawa left, he told Akaashi that Bokuto would be in the office, most likely packing his things up before it officially left, and that it would probably be a good opportunity to go and talk things out.

At first, Akaashi was hesitant, he knew Bokuto wouldn’t be happy with him just showing up unannounced, but then again there is no way he’d agree to meeting up with him.

The elevator doors opened on his floor, and he stepped out into the main hall, then headed down to their office. He stopped just by the door, aware that Bokuto didn’t know that he was there yet. He was stood by his desk, packing his stuff into boxes, all his owl things, the things that really gave the office life and colour, were being packed away into dark spaces.

Bokuto sealed the box with some tape, and then patted his pockets as if looking for something. He apparently couldn’t find it, and Akaashi held his breath as Bokuto turned around, his eyes widening upon seeing him in the doorway.

Bokuto had actually thought about trying to see him after speaking to Kuroo, but knew that if he saw him again he’d probably get angry and that wasn’t going to fix anything. His prediction was actually correct, and when he saw Akaashi standing there, anger bubbled up in his veins.

He had heard the excuses, the reasons behind what Akaashi did, but that didn’t justify the fact that he still stooped to that level. Bokuto had thought Akaashi was a more logical person.

“Oikawa told me you’d be here.” Akaashi said, trying to smile.

“What do you want?” Bokuto snapped.

Akaashi flinched, hurt by Bokuto’s harsh tone, but he shook it off, telling himself not to expect anything else, “I want to talk.”

“Kuroo has already told me all your little excuses, so whatever you have to say, just save it.” Bokuto said, brushing past Akaashi to go get something from another room. He headed back to his box on his desk and noticed Akaashi hadn’t moved, “Was there something else you wanted to say?”

Akaashi’s gaze dropped to the ground, “Bokuto nothing I can say will make any difference, but I am still incredibly sorry.”

“Do you think an apology is going to cut it? Akaashi I haven’t had a full night’s sleep in days, I’m constantly distracted, I’m easily irritated and I can’t get you out of my head no matter how hard I try to.” Bokuto said.

Akaashi didn’t know how to respond to that. Bokuto was thinking about him, but he didn’t want to. Was there any way to reply to that?

“Excuse me.” Bokuto said, brushing past Akaashi with the box in his arms, leaving the office and taking everything with him, including Akaashi’s hope.

When Bokuto got back to his apartment, he put his box of stuff down on the kitchen counter then collapsed onto the couch. He wasn’t happy with the way he acted just before, although he had his reasons. Truth was, he didn’t know how to act anymore, especially around Akaashi, it wasn’t awkward per se, it was just... weird...

He suddenly felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, and he fished it out with a sigh. He frowned at the number on the screen, it was totally unfamiliar, but he answered it anyway.

“Hello?”

_“Is this Bokuto?”_

The voice sounded vaguely familiar, but Bokuto wasn’t in the mood for much thinking, “Yes. Who is this, and how did you get my number?”

 _“Oh! Sorry, this is Rika, Keiji’s sister; I got your number off Kuroo.”_ Was the reply.

 _Why is Akaashi’s kid sister calling me?_ “Oh... What do you want?” it came out harsher than he intended.

_“Uh... I spoke to him, Keiji, I mean, not long ago and he just seemed really down and when I asked him he said he messed up and... It’s not really any of my business but...”_

“You’re wondering if it’s to do with me, aren’t you?”

 _“N-no!”_ Rika exclaimed, Bokuto had to hold his phone away from his ear briefly, _“It’s just I know him, and I don’t like how sad he’s being lately, I can feel his negative aura all the way over here! But, if you can, try and, I don’t know, help him?”_

Bokuto bit the inside of his cheek, “Why are you calling me and not Kuroo?”

Rika was silent for a bit, as if she was thinking of the best response, _“Well, like you said before, I kind of having a feeling it’s something to do with you, so you’re probably the best person to try and sort things out, you know what I mean. Plus, if I called Kuroo I’d just end up getting annoyed at him.”_

Bokuto could understand that, Kuroo was a very annoying person when he wanted to be. Rika was probably right about the other thing too. Bokuto was the only person who could work with Akaashi to get through whatever _this_ was. But why did he hate that so much, he had to admit it sooner or later, otherwise things would be going backwards.

_“I also wanted to thank you.”_

“Huh?”

_“My volleyball team made it to the finals this year; it’s the furthest the school has come in volleyball in over a decade! I like to think it’s all of the help you gave me practicing to block powerful spikes!”_

Bokuto couldn’t help but feel his heart well up with pride. “That’s awesome! Well done! I’m glad I could be of some help.”

_“You were a great teacher! The final is in a couple of days, I’ll let you know how we do. Nationals are so close.”_

Bokuto smiled, “You’ll do great; you’re a good blocker.”

 _“Thanks.”_ Rika replied, _“Right, I gotta go, but I’ll make sure to text you the result! See ya.”_

“See ya...” Bokuto said quietly, “Oh and Rika!”

_“Hmm?”_

“I’ll uh- I’ll see what I can do... about Akaashi, I mean.”

When there wasn’t a reply, Bokuto thought she hung up, but he heard a quiet laugh on the other line, _“Thanks.”_

\---

Akaashi was invited to Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s New Year party, but politely declined after being informed that Bokuto would be there, there’d be alcohol and it would most likely end in disaster if he showed up as well. He stayed at home, was curled up on the couch watching the programme before the countdown, with his hands pulled into his sweater sleeves. People were singing and dancing and having fun, and Akaashi pouted because there was actually a place he could go to have fun, he was welcome at Oikawa’s, but he didn’t know if he was ready to show his face to those people again after Christmas.

Actually, after that whole event, he didn’t even leave the house. Kuroo usually brought round food for them to eat whilst watching a movie, like a takeaway or ingredients to make a quick meal. At least he had Kuroo. Tonight he didn’t have Kuroo though, because for some reason Kuroo had gotten incredibly friendly with Oikawa, he’d been invited to the party, and asked Akaashi if he could go, like he needed permission. He was a grown-ass man.

Akaashi ordered himself a pizza and after it arrived he did nothing but stare at the screen and mindlessly pick at the pizza. He wasn’t overly hungry, and didn’t know why he bought it, but he still made an effort to eat it.

There was a faint buzz from the coffee table, and Akaashi leaned over to pick up his phone, receiving a photo from Oikawa. It was of his supervisor, his supervisor’s fiancé and Kuroo, all with glasses full of alcohol and party hats on, Kuroo even had a party popper hanging on his ear. The caption was; _We are missing you Akaashi!_

Akaashi smiled, at least, no matter how drunk they were, they were still thinking about him. He was about to shut his phone off and return it to its place on the coffee table when it buzzed again, another photo from Oikawa. It was a picture of Bokuto, and Akaashi subconsciously held his breath when he saw it. Bokuto was sat on the couch, a glass in his hand, looking absolutely miserable. He looked really, really sad and Akaashi couldn’t help kick himself because it was probably his felt he looked like that. The caption this time was; _I think Bokuto misses you the most!_

What did that mean? Why would Bokuto miss him, wasn’t he mad at him for what he did? Akaashi didn’t reply to any of those messages, especially not now, and put his phone back on the table. Bokuto wasn’t having fun, at a party where he was supposed to be having the time of his life, celebrating the fact that it’s the New Year, but he wasn’t, and that made Akaashi feel all sorts of levels of guilt and regret.

He was getting into watching a band perform live on the show he was watching when his phone buzzed for the third time. He considered just ignoring it, but it was from Kuroo, and he always had a hard time _not_ looking at Kuroo’s messages. Wondering what it was about, he picked up his phone, only to realise that it was just another drunken photo of a few people.

He recognised Daichi and Suga in the photo, Suga looking absolutely shitfaced whist Daichi was giving him a disapproving look, Konoha and Yukie were there, sitting on the couch talking to somebody Akaashi didn’t know, and of course, there was Kuroo. Kuroo was by the dining table, his eyes glazed over with a stupid grin on his face, his arm thrown around Oikawa.

Akaashi felt incredibly left out. Although, it was his fault. He got an invitation after all. But it’s not like he can just show up now; for starters, everybody there is already 3 drinks ahead of him, and by the time he actually gets there it’ll be past midnight anyway, and he didn’t really want to be driving around on his own when the New Year begins. Although, he would be on his own anyway, in his dark apartment, so what was the difference?

He was just about to close the photo when something in the background caught his eye. He didn’t know what to make of it, I mean he could’ve just been going outside for fresh air, but Bokuto was heading out the front door, looking like he was leaving.

A sudden pang of guilt hit Akaashi in the stomach. _That’s my fault. He’s not having fun because of me and I broke his heart!_

With the shake of his head, the closed the photo and put his phone as far away as he could reach, telling himself not to pick it up again, and only open messages from people he knew were sober, which at the moment wasn’t very many. Hell, even his little sister was probably at a house party somewhere, and his grandparents were probably sharing a bottle of wine in celebration.

He rubbed his face with his hands and flopped back against the couch. So much for going into the New Year with a bang. It was sad really, the fact that he was spending New Year alone, and just thinking about it made Akaashi try and shrink into the couch as much as he could with shame.

He couldn’t get Bokuto out of his head, how sad he looked, and how he left not long afterwards. Where was he going? Why did he leave? Did he have somewhere else to go? It was New Year! Where else would he go if not a party with alcohol and people that he loves?

It was a minute until the countdown, and Akaashi fought the urge to just shut the TV off and find out it was New Year when his phone overflowed with messages, because he wanted to see everybody cheering and their happy faces, as just because he’s miserable as fuck doesn’t mean other people are. His apartment suddenly felt too stuffy, too suffocating and he had to get out of there. Go anywhere but there.

\---

_Meanwhile..._

Bokuto was bored. He wasn’t usually bored, but there wasn’t really anything he found interesting going on. Yes, people were playing beer pong in the kitchen, yes there were people sitting in a circle playing truth or dare, and at another party Bokuto would be all for it. But he wasn’t tonight. There was something missing, something which was preventing him from having a good time.

He was sat on the couch mindlessly holding a glass of what he could only assume was whatever concoction Kuroo was making earlier on. He didn’t dare to even try it; he wasn’t drunk enough for that. Actually, he hadn’t drunk anything at all, apart from water.

There were a few people taking photos near to him, and he was pretty sure he was seen in the majority of them, not that he cared though. His mind was swarmed with the conversation he had with Kuroo the previous week at the coffee shop. What he had said to him, about Akaashi, and how he doesn’t think it’s fair to write him off just yet without knowing anything of the situation. Had he been too harsh? Did Akaashi deserve another chance?

Bokuto’s first thought was; _No way! He broke my heart and then stomped all over it!_ But after thinking about it, Akaashi did have his reasons, however irrational they may be.

Suddenly, Oikawa was in his face, leaning in and shoving his phone in his face, saying, “Bokuto misses Akaashi the most!”

Bokuto tried to ignore that, because Oikawa was obviously spewing drunken nonsense... But... it was true. As much as he tried to think around it, Bokuto was the one who missed Akaashi the most. Bokuto may be a bit too forgiving in situations, but this was not a situation he could see himself getting round all too quickly.

It was too loud at the party, there were people everywhere and Bokuto was just sitting on his own, feeling pretty sorry for himself. Kuroo had told him that Akaashi wanted to stay home, but that only meant that he was on his own as well.

With that thought in mind, it was impossible to think of anything else. He missed Akaashi, and although it was unlikely they would’ve actually seen each other before going back to work, the mere thought that they _wouldn’t_ sent uncomfortable tingles down Bokuto’s spine. He didn’t want that to happen.

Still, Kuroo’s words were swimming around in his head. Things like;

_“It is my fault, really. I should’ve been aware of the signs and called things off so it didn’t happen.”_

_“He does really care about you, and is truly regretful and wishes he could patch things up.”_

_“He’s a good guy, Akaashi is, and just really wants people to be happy, and he especially wants to apologise and see you happy again.”_

Bokuto wasn’t entirely sure if Kuroo was just spouting bullshit to get him to talk, or he was actually telling the truth. But either way, it pulled at Bokuto’s heartstrings and he couldn’t just ignore it. There was that and what Rika had said to him. She was totally right, he was one of the two people who could fix this.

So he was out of there. He couldn’t stay any longer. The alcohol he drank was doing nothing, and the music was giving him a headache, the beat filling his ears and the people around him seemed to be speaking a lot louder than they actually were. He just needed to leave. So he did.

He headed to the park just down the road from Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s house. He walked across the bridge crossing the lake, and found a familiar bench to sit on, one that he used to sit on quite a lot when he took a break from his jogs round the park.

He leaned forward and put his head in his hands. There was nobody else in the park, all probably at a party celebrating this happy time of year, or spending it at the shrine, or something which Bokuto wasn’t. He could hear the sound of the crickets in the grass, and the quiet and calm slosh of the water in the lake.

He didn’t even notice the footsteps in the distance, didn’t notice how they got considerably closer before they abruptly stopped, and a quiet but sharp inhale was heard.

Bokuto didn’t want to be bothered at the moment, but he looked at the shoes belonging to whoever stopped near to him. They were shoes he recognised immediately, the tatty way the laces were done up and the dirt stains along the side. He force himself to look up to confirm his suspicion. He let out a sigh and averted his eyes again. “Didn’t think I’d see you here.”

Akaashi let out his breath and shifted, “I can say the same thing to you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think, leave a comment and let me know :)
> 
> The next chapter should hopefully be up by the end of the week, if not before!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! 
> 
> But here's chapter 10, another one which is full of angst and sad moments but hey, you guys secretly love it!

There were harsh words, it almost blew up into another argument, but it didn’t. It was quiet in the park still, faint sounds in the distance as the countdown ended, people were cheering and it was the New Year. Akaashi and Bokuto spent it in silence, sitting on either end of the bench.

It was Bokuto who broke the silence first, “I didn’t mean to snap at you at the office the way I did.”

Akaashi looked over at him, “I still deserved it.”

“You did.” Bokuto nodded, “but I’ve never liked that side of me, which is why I spent about half the day blocking everything out on Boxing Day.”

Akaashi felt an oh so familiar pang of guilt again, “You already know how much I regret that, so I won’t say it again.”

Bokuto nodded again, and didn’t say anything more, so Akaashi decided it was his turn.

“I’d really like to work it out, to work things out between us, because we might not be working together anymore but I don’t want to just...” he tried to explain, but couldn’t think of anything to say.

“I know.” Bokuto said quietly, “I don’t know if I can do that though. I want to work things out too, because God, I still think about you too much for my liking, but just being with you right now makes my blood boil and all I can think about is what you said to me on Christmas.”

Akaashi grimaced at the memory, but he too had been thinking about it a lot recently, “Can we at least try? To move past this? I said things which I didn’t mean, I don’t think you’re infuriating, or annoying or loud, all those things make you who you are and those are the things that I-” Akaashi stopped himself before saying _“I love about you.”_

Bokuto was silent for a moment, before sitting back, “Call me crazy, but I- I still like you, you know, it takes a while to get over somebody you fell in love with, it hurts more when they hurt you, and it makes it harder. I want to work things out, I don’t want to just let you go, I want to do something about _this._ Whatever this is, but what you did really, really knocked me down a level. I just wish it never happened.”

Akaashi nodded, more to himself than anything else, and stood up, feeling Bokuto’s curious eyes on him. He turned to face the man sitting on the bench, smiled slightly and held out his hand, “Hi, I’m Akaashi Keiji; it’s nice to meet you.”

\---

_(2 days later)_

“Coach really liked you; you’ve got a pretty good chance of making it to the team.” Iwaizumi said, leaning back in his chair.

Bokuto sat opposite him at their table in the small cafe and smiled, “That’s great, I’m so happy I decided to tryout.”

Iwaizumi nodded, “Me too, we’d be lucky to have you.”

Bokuto stuck his fork into the slice of cake he was eating, and took a bite. He could tell Iwaizumi was watching him, and looked up with raised eyebrows, “Anything else you wanna say?” he asked.

Iwaizumi’s eye twitched, “It’s not really my business...” he said, “But Oikawa practically begged me to ask you because he’s so worried.”

Ah. Bokuto knew what he was about to ask.

“How are things with you and Akaashi?”

There it is.

Bokuto swallowed the piece of cake he was eating, and apparently that lump that was forming in his throat. He and Akaashi were... well, it was complicated. They both agreed to start fresh, trying their hardest to forget what happened, although it appeared easier for Akaashi than it did for Bokuto. “It’s going well, I suppose...” he replied with a shrug, “I mean, we both want to work it out but it’s not like it’s going to be easy.”

Iwaizumi nodded, “And this is another question on Oikawa’s behalf but... are you still... I mean, do you still...” he hesitated; he knew he just had to quickly spit it out, “Do you still love him?”

Bokuto wasn’t fazed by the question, he was expecting it, had been expecting it from most people who asked about his situation with Akaashi. To everybody, he gave the same simple response, “Yeah.”

Iwaizumi seemed surprised, “Really?”

“It’s not like it’s easy to get over somebody that you’re in love with, Iwaizumi.” Bokuto stated, “I’m not even sure I want to get over him, as crazy as that sounds.”

“I don’t think it sounds crazy.” Iwaizumi replied, “I’ve uh- I’ve had to deal with heartbreak before, but it does get better, if you call being engaged to an annoying alien fanatic better.”

Bokuto smiled, it was the first proper smile in a while, actually, “Oikawa’s not that bad.”

“Try living with him!” Iwaizumi snorted, “Man, I’ve known the guy my whole life, but nothing would’ve prepared me for spending the first night in the same house with him.” The thought made him shiver, and made Bokuto laugh, a proper one at that.

\---

“Can we talk about something that’s not my situation with Bokuto for once please?” Akaashi asked.

Kuroo held up his hands in defense, “S-sorry!” he spluttered, “Just wondering, it’s still not going as fast as you hoped?”

“I don’t know how to get him to look at me the way he did before.”

“Trust takes a long time to build, but-”

“Don’t get all philosophical on me, you bastard!” Akaashi interrupted, flicking him on the forehead.

“Wha- hey!” Kuroo said, holding a hand to his forehead, “Tsukki is coming over in a minute, don’t damage my face!” he got up off the couch and rushed into his bathroom, Akaashi rolling his eyes.

For a while now, Akaashi has found himself hanging out in Kuroo’s apartment a lot more recently, it was because he didn’t like the idea of being alone at the moment, at least until things were a little better with Bokuto. He was afraid he’d do something stupid, and relied on Kuroo to stop him from doing that. Although he did feel a little guilty every time Tsukishima came over for a movie or dinner, because he felt like he was just hanging around for the sake of hanging around.

There was a quick knock on the door, and Kuroo called out from the bathroom, “It’s probably Tsukki, can you just get it please?”

Akaashi got up and walked over to the door. He wasn’t really dressed for seeing anybody, kitted out in one of Kuroo’s jumpers, which he actually stole a long time ago, and some worn out sweatpants. Maybe it wasn’t a great idea to open the door to Kuroo’s boyfriend whilst wearing Kuroo’s jumper, but Tsukishima didn’t even know it had belonged to him, unless the size difference was any clue.

“Hi.” Akaashi said, opening the door.

Tsukishima didn’t look surprised to see Akaashi there, he never did anymore after getting used to it, but this time, he seemed a little, hesitant.

“Kuroo’s in the bathroom.” Akaashi closed the door.

“Actually, Akaashi before he comes out...” Tsukishima began, putting his coat over the back of the couch.

“What’s up?” Akaashi asked his co-worker.

“I don’t want to sound rude, because a lot has been going on for you right now and I know you need a friend but... You’re here a lot now, most of the time when I come over and I was wondering if tonight you could... Go home?”

Akaashi’s mouth opened a little, but this question wasn’t completely out of the blue. He had noticed how Tsukishima sometimes got uncomfortable when he was sat on one end of the couch curled up with Kuroo, and Akaashi would just be sitting the other end watching the same movie. “Uhm- y-yeah of course! I have been round a lot lately, kind of third-wheeling you guys, it’s totally cool! I’ll uh- I’ll head off now, tell Kuroo I said bye!”

Akaashi was out the door pretty quickly. He should go home, really, but the thought of being in an empty space on his own didn’t really seem to appealing. He contemplated going to see a movie, that way he’d be surrounded by other people, but he felt like being the people he knew, so he started the walk to Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s.

When he got there, he quietly knocked on the door, cautious of the fact that they might be having a movie night like Kuroo and Tsukishima, but that wasn’t the case, as Iwaizumi came to the door.

“Akaashi! What a surprise!” Iwaizumi smiled, “What can I do for you?”

“Um- sorry for just arriving like this but- I kinda don’t feel like being on my own right now and was wondering if I could hang out here?”

Iwaizumi’s eyes widened a fraction and for a second, he looked back into the house, “That’s fine and all, and you’re welcome here, it’s just...” another glance into the house, “Bokuto’s here.”

Akaashi took a step back, just as said man walked into view behind Iwaizumi, “Who’s at the- Akaashi... hi.”

“Hi.” Akaashi replied quietly, “Sorry, I can go if-”

“Don’t be stupid.” Bokuto interrupted, “We’re starting over, right?”

Akaashi swallowed, “R-right.”

\---

It wasn’t as awkward as he thought it would be, being with Bokuto, because things were working out, and it was easier to be with him now. There was still the issue with the whole trust thing, but Akaashi was sure that given Bokuto’s nature, he’ll be back to normal in no time.

They laughed and joked a lot of the time, but it was mostly Oikawa and Bokuto doing most of the talking, Iwaizumi occasionally said something, but Akaashi kept to himself a little more, wary that he might say something wrong.

“So tell me about your wedding.” Akaashi said after deciding that was a pretty safe topic, “I haven’t actually heard much about it.”

Oikawa’s face lit up and Iwaizumi rolled his eyes, “I’m surprised you haven’t, Oikawa hasn’t stopped telling people we know since we finally settled things.”

“Akaashi it’s so exciting!” Oikawa exclaimed, “Obviously you’re both invited.” he said looking at Bokuto, “It’s going to be at the end of the year, because we wanted it away from our birthdays, so the date is 16th of December, and it’s going to be a pretty big ceremony, the theme is silver and a pale blue kind of turquoise because that was the colour of our high school volleyball team.”

“That sounds lovely.” Akaashi smiled.

“Do you want to get married, Akaashi?” Oikawa asked, not noticing the way the atmosphere shifted in the room.

“I uh-” Akaashi hesitated, “I mean, it’s not something I’ve really thought about.” He could feel Bokuto’s eyes watching him, “I wouldn’t say I’d _never_ want to get married, but not at the moment.”

Oikawa smiled and nodded, “What about you, Bokuto?”

Bokuto didn’t really  have any expression on his face to give away how  he felt about that question, but he just shrugged, “I’ve always wanted to get married since I was a kid, but now I don’t think about it too much, I haven’t really been in a relationship long enough to consider marriage.”

Oikawa seemed happy with that answer, and went on to talk about how excited he was about the wedding. Bokuto sat there for another 3 minutes before excusing himself to go to the bathroom. Akaashi watched him go, and followed him after a moment.

Bokuto was sat on the floor in the bathroom by the sink, his head in his hands and his knees tucked under his chin.

“You okay?” Akaashi asked, closing the bathroom door behind him.

Bokuto shrugged, not looking up to meet his eyes.

“I really hope you make it onto the team.” Akaashi said, “I’m sure you will, you’re a really good-”

“Akaashi what do you want?” Bokuto cut him off.

Akaashi blinked in surprise. He thought they were doing fine, they were talking like they usually were, things didn’t seem as awkward as he expected, why this sudden outburst?

“W-well you just seemed a little... distant.”

“Is that so wrong?” Bokuto asked, “To feel empty when something’s been ripped out of you?”

Akaashi knew what this was. Bokuto was working his way into his dejected mode all by himself, and although they may not be on the best of terms right now, Akaashi knew how to handle them and wasn’t going to let it happen.

“Don’t say that to me.” Akaashi replied quietly. He didn’t want to get into _another_ argument with the guy, but being stern was one of the best ways to get Bokuto out of this mood. “Don’t pull that shit because you know how much I hate what happened, so don’t go throwing that in my face, because it hurts.”

Bokuto scoffed, “You know what it’s like though, right?”

Ouch. He had _not_ been expecting that. Akaashi was a little lost for words, but he _did_ know what it was like, of course he did. Bokuto wasn’t the only one who had his heart shattered; Akaashi just dealt with it a lot more privately. “I do.” He said, sitting down with his back against the bath, next to Bokuto. “I really do.”

Bokuto nodded, “Then we’re both messes then aren’t we?” he mumbled, “How did you deal with this?”

Akaashi cast his mind back. All he remembered about what had happened the past month was that it involved a lot of booze, “Alcohol, mostly.” He said truthfully.

Bokuto smiled, and it made Akaashi’s stomach flutter, to be able to see him smile after such a long time, “That doesn’t seem like such a bad idea.”

“But it was.” Akaashi said, and Bokuto’s smile disappeared, remembering the consequences of _some_ drunken mistakes.

Bokuto hummed, and stretched out his legs a little, he even went as far as to rest his head on Akaashi’s shoulder, which made the younger tense a little, but he calmed himself down straight after. “Akaashi I’ve made a mistake.”

“Oh?” Akaashi replied, “What’s that?”

Bokuto could feel the vibration in Akaashi’s chest rumble through his shoulders, but didn’t move his head, “I didn’t hear you out properly. You couldn’t feel like you could tell me and I assumed that you liked me back without realising that you were in fact _drunk._ ”

“No, no, no, with what I did, you’re under no obligation to be reasonable to me.” Akaashi said, tapping his foot on the tiled floor. He heard that all before anyway, when Kuroo blamed himself for not realising the way Akaashi felt.

“But that’s not who I am.” Bokuto said, “I’m not the kind of person who blocks people out, and when I did that to you I felt really bad but didn’t want to come to terms with it because I don’t like that side of me.”

Akaashi didn’t say anything for a while, he thought of a few things to say, but there wasn’t really anything he could say to follow that.

“I’m willing to hear you out now, though.” Bokuto said after a while.

Akaashi exhaled and risked resting his head on top of Bokuto’s, who was still comfortable on his shoulder, “No.” He said, “I’ve said what I had to say.”

Akaashi heard Bokuto sniff, and looked down to see him fighting back tears, and he turned his face into Akaashi’s shoulder to hide himself, “I- Akaa-”

“What?” Akaashi asked, leaning closer. “What did you say?”

“I- I’m sorry... I’m so sorry...” he cried.

Akaashi squeezed his own eyes closed, what would they do if Oikawa or Iwaizumi walked in and they were just a crying mess on the floor? Akaashi shifted a little so he was facing Bokuto a little more, “You have nothing to be sorry for.” He said, a tear escaping and trickling down his cheek.

Bokuto hesitated, but reached up and wiped it with his thumb, his bottom lip was trembling, and Akaashi put up a hand and put it on his cheek, and it somewhat calmed him, “I still mean it.” he managed, dropping his gaze so he wouldn’t see Akaashi looking back at him.

Akaashi smiled and hugged Bokuto’s head to his chest, mumbling quietly into his hair, “I know.”

\---

_(3 days later)_

“Bokuto’s coming over to watch a movie in a minute so...” Akaashi trailed off, hoping Kuroo would get the message and skedaddle.

Said man, looked over at Akaashi from the fridge and raised an eyebrow, “You’re kidding me, right?”

Akaashi furrowed his eyebrows, “Um. No?”

Kuroo almost choked on his drink, “Akaashi, do I need to remind you of the nights where Tsukki would come over and you’d be there on the end of the couch?”

The younger scrunched his nose, “Okay... okay I get it, but this has to work out between us, it’s a really important night.”

Kuroo laughed, “I want it to work out too, buddy, but next time you want to kick me out make sure you don’t spend almost every night at my apartment beforehand.”

“Duly noted.” Akaashi grinned.

He was actually really looking forward to seeing Bokuto, and was surprised that Bokuto suggested it in the first place, but this was what they were doing now, small things, building their way into a more steady friendship again.

“Alright, then, I’ll get lost.” Kuroo said, walking over to Akaashi and kissing the top of his head, “You kids behave.”

Akaashi smirked and brushed him off, “Get out of here!”

It wasn’t long after Kuroo left that Bokuto showed up, there was a quick knock on the door, but it lacked the usual rhythm to it that it used to have. Akaashi walked over to the door and unlocked it. “Hi.” He said, opening the door wider for Bokuto to step in.

“Hey.” Bokuto replied, toeing off his shoes and shrugging off his jacket. “Look, before we watch the movie, you need to know this.”

Akaashi blinked, “O-okay.” He muttered, not knowing what to expect.

“I shouldn’t have broken down like I did at Oikawa’s.” he started, “It was stupid and... I just shouldn’t have done it, so I’m sorry if you felt uncomfortable or whatever, but I regret it.” he said, “That night I was just very emotional, and having Oikawa talk about his wedding made it worse because...” _Because I do want to get married, and after the Christmas party you were the one I could see myself marrying. Until_ that _happened, that is._  

Akaashi was lost for words. Bokuto crying didn’t make him feel uncomfortable, it gave him a sense that things were going to be okay, that he was able to cry in front of him so surely that means he’s beginning to warm up to him again... “Okay.”

“Secondly. This isn’t a date in any way, shape or form. I don’t want to just rush into something like that so soon, I want to establish boundaries first and I want to see where things go before letting myself open up again. Despite what my stupid feelings are.”

“I’m fine with that. I know it’s probably been difficult for you, but, thank-you for at least trying.” Akaashi replied, trying not to let it show that he was maybe a little hurt by Bokuto saying his feelings for him were stupid.

“Thank-you.”

Watching a movie was a good idea. They didn’t have to talk, and so there was a comfortable silence as the film played on. It was a good way to lighten the mood, but it was also another step into being comfortable around each other again. Akaashi felt happy, he was happy, sitting next to Bokuto, a big bowl of popcorn between them.

He wasn’t sure whether or not Bokuto felt the same, but he was pretty sure his shoulders weren’t as tense as they were before, and his face got more and more relaxed as the film played on.

Things were going great, until the end of the movie, where there was that cliché scene at the end of so many films, where the heroin kisses the hero and they decide that they magically want to be together. As Akaashi watched them, he could feel Bokuto shift on the couch and he watched out the corner of his eye as Bokuto got up. “Excuse me.” It was only when Bokuto’s voice broke that Akaashi realised he was crying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooo, what's going to happen next?   
> Find out in the next chapter which I will hopefully have ready for you next week some time, but please be patient. 
> 
> Thanks so much for reading and let me know what you think :D


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit longer than the others, and there is HUGE progression in Bokuto and Akaashi's relationship to the point where I am pretty sure I've gone into it too quickly and overdone it, but there are time-skips as well (even if they are short) so I hope that it spaces it out a little.
> 
> But I apologise if it's gone too quickly, beause I'm really worried it has, but I've said before I hate writing them all sad and miserable and want to get to the happy times as soon as I can, so I hope you understand.  
> I kinda wish that I was the kind of person to be able to drag things out without it getting boring and write well enough to keep it interesting without major plot description, but this is all I can do and I'm really sorry... I just feel like what I've written in this chapter isn't realistic enough and I know that none of it really is but I just feel like some of you have expectations that I can't live up to and I don't want to let you down. (man this is getting deep I'm sry.)
> 
> I'm actually really nervous about posting this chapter because of this, but please let me know what you think :D (and please, please, please read the notes at the end as well, thank-you."

Akaashi knocked gently on the bathroom door; he was hesitant about bothering him, wondering if it was a good idea or not considering their situation. But nonetheless, he was upset and Akaashi wasn’t going to just let him be upset without at least trying to comfort him.

He heard a soft mumble on the other side of the door and he took it as permission to enter the room, despite it being his bathroom anyway.

“Bo-” Akaashi cut himself off. This may not have been the first time he’s seen Bokuto cry in a bathroom, but that doesn’t mean he likes it. He was pressing toilet paper to his eyes.

“I’m sorry I can’t do this.” He said.

“Do what?” Akaashi asked, staying by the door.

Bokuto looked up with red eyes and said as clearly as he could. “Akaashi I love you.”

Akaashi broke eye-contact and stared at the linoleum floor. “I-”

“I love you and I can’t hold it in anymore.” Bokuto continued to blurt, “I lied. I lied about wanting to take things slow, about not listening to my feelings because I just... I- I _love_ you and I know that given what’s happened I shouldn’t but I _do!”_

Akaashi’s mouth went dry, and he could hear the faint murmur of the TV in the next room. He used that as an excuse not to reply to what Bokuto just said, “I uh- I think the movie is still playing.” He said, as he made a quick escape.

He didn’t go back into the bathroom after pausing the film.

Bokuto left 5 minutes after. His face was red, and he barely mumbled a goodbye.

Akaashi sat on the couch for a while after, just staring at the closed door. He did the only thing he could think of, call Kuroo.

Kuroo arrived pretty quickly, so Akaashi could only assume he was with Tsukishima. “I wasn’t interrupting anything, was I?”

“Huh? Oh, no, it’s cool. Tsukki had stuff to do anyway.” Kuroo shrugged, “Besides, my best friend needed me.”

“I don’t know what to do anymore. He still loves me.” Akaashi curled into the corner of the couch.

Kuroo bit his lip, he wasn’t exactly the best with relationship advice, hell he was the worst. But he can come up with a few ideas or so when he needs to. “Why don’t you... Ask him out?”

Akaashi looked up, his eyes wide, “Like on a _date?”_

“Yeah?” Kuroo shrugged, “Look I know you want things to go slowly, but I mean, it’s obvious that he wants to be in a relationship with you, and let’s face it you want to be with him too and, why don’t you just go for it?”

“Because I’ll fuck it up again.” Akaashi replied, “He’s already given me a second chance, he’s risked getting his heart broken _again_ for this, I don’t want to ruin it like I did before and if that happens then he won’t ever want to see me.”

Kuroo blinked, “Don’t you think the reason you fucked up in the first place was because you cared about him enough not to want to hide secrets from him? I mean, if you do what you did before again, then it’s not like it’s that bigger deal because you’d be dating him, and let’s face it, couples shouldn’t hide secrets from each other.”

Kuroo was a good guy. He wanted to help Akaashi and Bokuto work things out and yes, he did want them to be a couple, but whilst he was giving all this advice to Akaashi, he felt a strange and unpleasant pit in his stomach.

Akaashi took a deep breath and looked at Kuroo with a nod, “Okay.”

\---

“Thanks for meeting me here.” Akaashi said, walking up to the bench Bokuto was sat on in the park.

“It’s fine.”

“I uh- Firstly I wanted to say sorry about how I reacted when you said what you said last time we were together. Truth is, I was a little taken back, I wasn’t expecting it and I handled it badly. But, it made me happy, really happy.”

Bokuto was shuffling his feet on the gravel, creating messy patterns as the stones were pushed around, “What’s the secondly?”

Akaashi blinked, “ _Secondly._ I think we should go on a- on a date.”

There wasn’t a reply.

“I thought about what you said, talked to a friend, and you should also know that somewhere along the line, I don’t want things to slow down either.” Akaashi said, “I care about you a lot, I think this could be good for us.”

“Fine.” Bokuto mumbled, “Let’s go on a date.”

Akaashi smiled. It was good Bokuto was taking this seriously; he wasn’t sure how he’d react, after all. But so far it’s going okay; the only problem now is deciding what to do for their date. Go out for a movie? Dinner? A walk? There were too many options and it had to be perfect, there wasn’t room for a mistake anymore.

\---

Despite not yet arranging a time and place for a date, Akaashi and Bokuto had been spending a lot more time together, to the point where they would talk comfortably again when they’re alone.

They did speak about what they were to each other, where things were headed, and both came to a mutual understanding that they wanted the same things. To be in a relationship with the other.

 _I love you._ They were unspoken words at the moment, but they both knew that it was true for them. Bokuto had already said it, and although Akaashi hadn’t, he’d warmed up to him a lot, and so Bokuto had understood.

Akaashi was incredibly thankful that Bokuto was as forgiving, kind and understanding as he was. He wasn’t sure that he would be able to do what Bokuto did if somebody broke his heart the way he broke Bokuto’s.

For this to work, however, there was one last thing he had to get out of the way...

\---

“I- I’m not in love with you anymore.”

Kuroo’s eyes widened a little, and his lips parted as if he was about to say something, but he didn’t know _what_ to say.

He huffed a quiet laugh and ran his tongue over his teeth, “That actually hurt more than I thought it would.”

“What do you mean?”

Kuroo leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees, “You know during, what we had, it was... there was... how do I put this? There was always more than just... sex. Like, although I had no idea how you felt, and although I didn’t feel the same regardless, I always just felt really happy around you, and I enjoyed what we had.”

“Is this a confession?”

“No!” Kuroo blurted, holding his hands up, “No, of course not! I just... I worded it wrong but what I’m trying to say is that we’ll always be a little bit more than friends, it’s what I think, anyway, and although it may not be like... _romance_ , I think...” he scratched the back of his head, “Damn, I’m confusing myself.”

“Yeah, me too.”

“I’m uh- I’m happy for you and Bokuto, of course, it’s great you’ve found somebody who’ll give you the attention and love you deserve, and I’m sorry it didn’t work out for you sooner.” Kuroo said, “I’ll always be here, okay? For whatever you need, you can come to me.”

Akaashi bowed his head, and looked up at Kuroo through his eyelashes, “Thank-you.”

\---

Kuroo felt weird. He wasn’t sure what this feeling was, but he knew that he didn’t like it. His stomach started feeling peculiar when he got back home after meeting with Akaashi, there was also a strange sensation in his chest. He shook his head, telling himself it’ll pass, that it was indigestion or heart burn.

But that didn’t explain why he couldn’t get Akaashi out of his head, why he couldn’t stop thinking about how happy Akaashi is now that he’s with Bokuto, how happy Bokuto made him. Was he... was he jealous?

“What’s with your face?” Tsukishima looked up from his book, “You’re going to get wrinkles.”

Kuroo started a bit, but shrugged a little, “I’m just thinking.”

Tsukishima closed his book, “Anything you want to talk about?”

Kuroo opened his mouth to say something, but closed it a second later. He had thought about talking to Tsukishima about this; they guy seemed to give honest opinions in situations, but he wasn’t sure if he wanted to involve him in something which has already caused so much trouble, especially if he isn’t sure about his feelings anymore. He knows he loves Tsukishima, but depending on how he worded things, would the younger get the wrong impression of his feelings for Akaashi?

He shook his head, “No, thanks.”

Tsukishima nodded and went back to his reading. Kuroo watched him for a moment, and compared his relationship with him to Akaashi and Bokuto’s. Obviously, between the two of them there was a lot less drama and tension, but it was also obvious there was more heat, chemistry and romance in Akaashi and Bokuto’s relationship, whether they were aware of it or not.

Was there enough romance and chemistry in his own relationship? They were happy, went out frequently and the sex was good, but he was slightly envious of the way his two friends looked at each other, especially after everything that’s happened.

This was stupid. He shouldn’t be jealous of them. He had an amazing boyfriend without all the drama, he _hadn’t_ drawn the short stick, he should be happy about that. Then was this about Akaashi? Was he jealous of only Bokuto because he was the one Akaashi chose in the end?

Kuroo screwed his eyes shut and sighed. This was so, so stupid and complicated! He was over thinking way too much. He had to concentrate on getting Akaashi and Bokuto into the stage where they’re dating, because even if they don’t see it themselves, they are literally a couple already (despite the fact that there is still a little tension between them.) and he was prepared to do whatever he could to help them get to that stage.

\---

“Are we... dating now?” Bokuto asked, barely looking over his phone to Akaashi.

Akaashi’s mouth twitched, “I suppose... technically, but we haven’t been on that date I mentioned. But that aside, I’d like us to be, I’d like us to be seeing each other.”

Bokuto nodded in understanding, “I guess I can do that.”

“But if you-” Akaashi cleared his throat, “If you want to slow things down again, that’s cool too, I know it’s fast but-”

“No.” Bokuto cut him off, “It _is_ fast, but I think that’s better. I think going into this as... as a couple is better because it doesn’t give me time to think, I just do it, and I’ve always been a person to live in the moment.”

Akaashi smiled, “Well then... I’m glad.”  He said, “Does this- uh- does this mean you’re my... are we... you know?”

Bokuto finally looked up from his phone, pausing in whatever he was scrolling through, “Well... I want to be in a relationship with you. And if that’s what we’re heading towards, then I suppose on some level you’re my... boyfriend...”

Akaashi swallowed, “Is that too sudden?” he mumbled, “I don’t want you to think that we are now the type of couple who hold hands and snuggle and stuff because-”

“It’s fine.” Bokuto once again cut him off, “That’s what couples do... so it’s fine.”

Akaashi felt a weight lift off his shoulders. Bokuto was incredibly understanding, what did he do to deserve somebody like that?

\---

“So...” Kuroo said, leaning back in his seat and taking a bite out of his sandwich, “How are things with Bo?”

Akaashi twiddled the fry he was holding in his fingers in consideration, “We’re okay... I guess...”

“You guess?” Kuroo raised an eyebrow.

“Well it’s just- we haven’t actually been on a date yet.”

Kuroo nodded, taking another bite and then he dropped it back on the plate, his eyes wide. “Akaashi I have the _best_ idea ever!” he claimed.

“Oh yeah?” Akaashi smirked, “What’s that then?”

“Your tone is not appreciated.” Kuroo joked, Akaashi just smiled back at him. “Anyway... I was thinking you and Bo, could double-date with me and Tsukki!”

“’Tsukki?’” Akaashi questioned, “I highly doubt he’s letting you call him that.”

“Well... not exactly...” Kuroo admitted, “But come on! How awesome would that be?”

Akaashi considered it. It would be nice, that way him and Bokuto could get the whole dating ball rolling without having to give it a push on their own. It’d be less awkward with Kuroo and Tsukishima there, and they would have more to talk about. Plus, Akaashi hadn’t seen Tsukishima in a few days and it would be nice to catch up, despite knowing that there could be tension due to the whole; _“You’re dating the fuckbuddy that I was in love with.”_ Thing. He was actually surprised Tsukishima had agreed to date Kuroo, considering the blond just seemed to hate everybody. He took his time opening up to people, and almost never had a boyfriend or girlfriend hanging around. But, good for him, giving Kuroo a chance.

“Fine, it sounds good. Text me the details later on, ‘kay?”

Kuroo nodded in affirmation and stole a fry from Akaashi’s plate, earning himself a very aggressive glare. Akaashi didn’t like it when people took his food.

\---

The restaurant Kuroo picked was nice. It wasn’t too big and it wasn’t too small and pokey. It was a quiet place with nice decor and a calming playlist playing in the background over the speakers.

Bokuto was sat opposite him in the booth, happily talking to Tsukishima about something work related. Tsukishima didn’t look too bored, but could probably do with talking about something else.

Akaashi was sat next to Kuroo, who kept on glancing over at him. Akaashi didn’t know why, and he didn’t really _want_ to know why; it was like Kuroo was checking up on him or something.

“You okay?” Kuroo eventually asked.

“Yup.” Akaashi nodded. He turned away from Kuroo and spoke to his colleague, “So Tsukishima, you’ve recently finished your latest assignment, right? I heard it went really well!”

Tsukishima gave a small nod, “Yeah, it was okay. Oikawa was really happy with it.”

Bokuto went on to talking about something with Kuroo. Akaashi looked over the menu for about the hundredth time, trying to think of something to talk about with Tsukishima, but something caught his eye under the table.

 _Oh God... Oh God, they’re playing footsie!_ Akaashi stared at Tsukishima and Kuroo’s legs under the table, tangled up together and carefully running up the side of the outside of them.

Well. This would certainly make the night more interesting.

\---

“Well, thanks for tonight. I had a good time.” Kuroo smiled. He and Tsukishima were saying goodbye to Akaashi and Bokuto outside of Akaashi’s apartment complex.

“I did too!” Bokuto beamed, eagerly high-fiving Kuroo.

Tsukishima and Akaashi exchanged friendly nods, and then Akaashi turned to Kuroo. “Thanks for paying tonight, although you should’ve let me pay as well.”

Kuroo waved him off, “Nonsense. My treat!”

Akaashi smiled, and Bokuto couldn’t help his chest feel tighter when he saw the way Akaashi’s eyes sparkled at Kuroo.

“Well, have a nice night!” The shorter said, putting a hand on the door and waving them off.

Once they were in the apartment it was silent. Bokuto didn’t think he should say anything, it would only make Akaashi uncomfortable, but he couldn’t think of anything else to say!

“Want to stay over? It’s pretty late.” Akaashi piped up, turning into his bedroom and just flicking the light on.

“Wha- we- do you want me to sleep on the couch?”

Akaashi almost laughed, “Don’t be silly, you can sleep in the bed. We’re seeing each other, remember?”

Bokuto nodded with a forced smile and followed Akaashi into the bedroom. It wasn’t like they were going to do anything; the atmosphere was off and they were both pretty tired from the double-date.

“Oh-” Akaashi spun around and looked over at Bokuto. He clicked his fingers, “I don’t have anything you can change into which will fit. You- you may have to go...”

Bokuto’s cheeks flushed a little, then he laughed nervously, “As long as that’s alright with you.”

“Well I mean... not if you’re uncomfortable with it.”

Bokuto had to try and not stare at Akaashi as he changed into some basic sleep clothes; a plain t-shirt and some black shorts. His body was just as nice as his own, it wasn’t as defined, but the muscle was still obviously there. Akaashi climbed under the covers and looked over to see Bokuto still standing there fully dressed, “You’re going to sleep standing, I see.”

Bokuto shook his head out of his daze and grabbed the hem of his shirt, “Nah, one sec.” He pulled his shirt up and over his head, trying to ignore the pleasantly surprised gasp Akaashi made from the bed. There was no point denying it; Bokuto had the body of a God. Arms; toned. Stomach; fucking defined. Thighs; thick. Why must Akaashi suffer so much?

When Bokuto was finished changing he stood still, as if he was waiting for Akaashi to invite him over. Eventually, when Akaashi gave him a questioning look he shuffled over to the bed and sat down on the end of it. He felt Akaashi moving around behind him and suddenly he was at his side, playing with his fingers nervously as if he wanted to say something.

“Is uh-” Akaashi began, “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah... but can we talk for a moment, before we go to sleep?”

Akaashi tensed a little at the serious tone in Bokuto’s voice. He shifted a little and nodded, “Sure.”

It took a moment for Bokuto to actually begin talking. There was a silence, it wasn’t too long but it seemed tense and suffocating. Bokuto kept thinking back to the way Akaashi was looking at Kuroo when they said goodbye, how happy he looked. “Are you still in love with Kuroo?”

Akaashi blinked. The question caught him off guard, but on some level he knew that Bokuto was thinking it, like a lurking question in the back of his mind that he fought the urge to ask. He opened his mouth to reply, but closed it again, not too sure what to say.

“I understand that it’ll take a while to get over feelings that strong...” Bokuto carried on, not looking at Akaashi, but at the floor, “But, you know, things are different, and I don’t know if this is going to work as well as it could between us if there are still feelings for him... you know?” He looked up at the younger, “A-are you?”

Akaashi thought about it, not for too long though. What was the right answer? Was there even a right answer to say? Bokuto was looking at him with so much admiration and love that he didn’t want to risk saying anything to upset him. But, he should tell the truth.

“No.” He breathed. He was staring at the floor but didn’t miss the way Bokuto’s body shifted with surprise. “I- I still love him, but it’s platonic... he broke my heart, so I don’t love him the way I used to.”

Despite them talking, there was a silence surrounding them, and the only things they could hear were each other. “It _will_ take time, and it’ll be hard, but now I think that because you’re here it’ll make it a lot easier. You know, I sometimes think that there will always be a part of me which will wonder what it would be like if Kuroo loved me back, but it’ll never mean anything because I’ll be with you. You’ll help me get over him, which I will eventually do, and I _have_ to, because he’s my best friend, and he’s with somebody, and I can’t let my selfish feelings get in the way of that.”

Bokuto nodded slowly in understanding.

“Was there anything else you wanted to ask me?”

Bokuto shook his head, and the two of them climbed under the covers. Bokuto was a bit unsure of what to do now he was lying down, but just decided that if Akaashi wanted to snuggle or do anything he could do it when he was ready.

There was silence, then, “You’re not selfish. Your feelings aren’t selfish.”

Akaashi sat up, “Thank-you but-”

“No I’m serious!” Bokuto interrupted, sitting up as well, “You deserve to be with somebody you love, deserve to be loved and to be wanted! It’s not your fault that the person you love wasn’t available.”

“I suppose...” Akaashi agreed, although he was a little uncertain.

“Do you love me?” Bokuto asked suddenly.

Now how was he supposed to answer _that?!_ Truth was, he didn’t really love Bokuto all that much. Yes there were definitely some feelings, but to build their relationship to the point of love just yet seemed a little too much for Akaashi.

When he was silent for a little too long, Bokuto nodded, “It’s okay, I know-”

“No I do!”  Akaashi blurted, “I- I do... I love you.”

Bokuto laughed and wrapped his arms around Akaashi, pulling him down with him as he laid back on the bed. They shifted a little until Akaashi was curled against Bokuto, his hair tickling Bokuto’s nose.

Bokuto froze. “I- is this... is this o-okay?” he asked, moving away from Akaashi in case it wasn’t and he overstepped the boundary. They hadn’t really discussed any of this yet, but he did was he was familiar with and only then realised what he had done.

Akaashi turned around to look at him with his eyebrows raised, “Don’t be stupid. If we’re _boyfriends_ now, then it’s cool, don’t hold back, and neither will I.”

Bokuto blushed at that, for some reason. Seeing Akaashi look at him like that made his skin heat up, and he was pretty sure Akaashi felt it. What was that? He look in Akaashi’s eyes was different than usual, it was mischievous and he didn’t know if he could trust it or not...

Eventually, he settled back down and decided what the hell? Akaashi was right, and the only way to get through this was to look forward and just _go for it._ Like he said before, he was one to live in the moment, and call him too forgiving, but he thought it was worth it for Akaashi.

Bokuto inhaled, breathing in the scent of vanilla and macadamia and something distinctively Akaashi. He decided that moment that it was his favourite scent. He curled himself further around Akaashi and smiled as he closed his eyes, his mind set on falling asleep.

That was, however, until his eyes shot open at the feeling of Akaashi slowly wriggling around in his hold, his ass dangerously close to Bokuto’s crotch. Akaashi appeared to be asleep. _Was this something he did in his sleep?!_

Unfortunately, it didn’t stop, and inevitably, Bokuto popped a boner and it was probably the worst-timed boner as well, because Akaashi was asleep and so was Bokuto’s arm, trapped underneath the weight of an, albeit adorable, but fairly heavy when asleep, beauty of a man.

_Well shit._

When Bokuto was about to give up and try and ease his arm out from underneath Akaashi, he heard the younger attempt to stifle a laugh. “A-Akaashi?!” so that’s what that mischievous look was about earlier, the little bastard.

Akaashi snorted, “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry, I didn’t expect you to get so worked up so quickly, it was just an experiment!”

Bokuto’s eyes widened, “What?!”

Akaashi’s voice calmed a little, but he gave out another little cute giggle, “I- I’m really sorry... But uh- would you perhaps like some assistance?”

Bokuto raised an eyebrow, “Was this just an excuse to get in my pants?”

“Well maybe! Yes!” Akaashi admitted, “I completely understand if you say no, but whilst we’re working through things so quickly I thought who cares? We’ve had sex before, maybe not in the best circumstances, but... I just can’t stop thinking about you lately, and you’re practically naked and it’s a real turn on.”

Bokuto gaped at him; he blinked a couple of times before nodding vigorously, his sex-drive kicking into overdrive, “I’m fine with it.”

Akaashi grinned and turned over, before sitting up and swinging a leg over Bokuto’s body. He enthusiastically leaned forward and started kissing Bokuto, his hands roaming over his chest.

It was fast. Too fast for your typical couple who had a very big argument and hardly spoke and just rekindled their feelings for each other, but Bokuto and Akaashi weren’t your typical couple by a _long shot._

He shifted a little more to be able to start grinding against Bokuto’s hips, but when he moved his knee forwards, Bokuto cried out painfully and he went cross-eyed. Akaashi stared down at him, was he messing around? Because it was a real mood killer.

Akaashi rolled his eyes and moved again, but Bokuto let out a pained whimper and Akaashi paused. He looked down in between their bodies and his eyes widened into big, dark teal disks which were staring at what was there.

Yup. He’d just kneed Bokuto in the dick. Twice.

Akaashi was tripping over his words, “I- Oh my God! I- I’m so- are you alright? I’m so sorry! I’ll get you some ice- I’m such an idiot are you okay?”

But of course, Bokuto couldn’t reply, he was just holding his breath and counting to ten, his eyes stinging with tears. He brought his hands down to his crotch and just laid there, and carefully, Akaashi got off of his lap and rushed off into the kitchen to get some ice.

Akaashi held the door to the freezer open with one hand whilst the other searched the drawers for a bag of peas or at least something Bokuto can use to numb the pain. _Damn it! Well done, knee the guy that you want to have sex with in the dick! That’s one way to completely cock-block yourself!_

When he returned to the bedroom, Bokuto had managed to sit up and lean against the headboard, he still looked uncomfortable though.

“Here...” Akaashi handed him the peas, “I am _so_ sorry!”

Bokuto happily accepted the peas and let out a happy sigh when he pressed the bag against his crotch, “I-it’s not your fault, it was an accident.” He replied.

“Still... I kinda ruined the moment.”

Bokuto shrugged, “Yeah, but this’ll make a funny story to tell friends and family at Christmas!” he joked.

Akaashi blushed, “It’s not something I particularly want to bring up!” he hid behind his hands, and Bokuto just laughed.

“I suppose...” Bokuto agreed, “Well, this wasn’t exactly how I thought things would go but we have plenty of other opportunities.”

Akaashi blinked. Of course, they were together now, so technically they should be able to have sex whenever, so why did it feel so damn awkward now? Him kneeing Bokuto in the crotch was like a sign, a sign that this was too soon and wasn’t right. It wasn’t like it was going to be a repeat of the last time, and they’d already seen each other with little to no clothes on, so what was the big deal.

“Akaashi? You okay?”

“Hmm?” Akaashi looked up and opened his mouth, “Yeah of course! Plenty of time!”

Bokuto smiled and squeezed his hand.

Well, it didn’t go according to plan, but none of this has gone according to plan anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've never said this but every time I get a notification telling me I have a comment I get really nervous to read it because I think it's going to be negative (although they never are because you guys are absolutely amazing and your support is very appreciated), and I'm pretty sure that's what it's going to be like but worse for this chapter. (I'm rambling someone stop me.)
> 
> I am totally unsure about this chapter, but still hope that you guys enjoyed reading it. Of course it's not going to be that simple for them, their relationship will still have the odd rough patch but I wanted to get the whole "It's awkward because of the argument" bit out of the way so I can work on more of their progression as a couple.
> 
> Either way, please let me know what you thought, and I'm open to constructive criticism as well (don't just be rude for the sake of it please), and as I am unsure of this chapter I really want to know what you guys thought.
> 
> Thanks for reading and look out for the next one :D


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, now I know some of you are going to be either confused or a little mad because I took away the x/12 thing and changed it to x/? and now it's still 12 chapters, but that's because firstly, this chapter is so late, and I am so sorry about that but some personal stuff came up that I had to deal with, and also I've kinda come up with ideas for different things and felt like this fic was dragging me down because I'd lost interest in it a little.
> 
> But anyway, this would've been two chapters, but because of the delay, I've combined the last two chapters together as an apology and created the ultimate chapter!! However because I did this, I edited it a lot and took out parts, switched the order of things and it was very confusing to do, but that does mean that there could be mistakes so please, please, please let me know if there are because that'd be embarrassing! 
> 
> I did really enjoy writing this, and I hope that you enjoyed reading it just as much, but as this is the end, I just want to say thank-you so much for sticking with it, and enjoy the final chapter!

After that incident, things have been... questionable. They’re getting on great, better than either of them would’ve expected considering. But they are incredibly cautious when it comes to physical contact. They’ve held hands, walking down the streets or in the park, Akaashi occasionally leans his head on Bokuto’s shoulder when they watch a movie, and sometimes Bokuto kisses the top of his head.

But that’s it. It’s not like it’s too much of a problem, they both agreed that it’s _better_ to take things slowly, but it’d be nice if they could kiss without it feeling awkward, just a little peck on the cheek. But there wasn’t any of that.

It was obvious that Bokuto was trying to find ways of making advances, but in all honesty, it seemed impossible, especially now since Akaashi had been given a new assignment and is working a lot of the time.

“So you haven’t been able to...” Kuroo trailed off, hoping Akaashi would catch on. He was sat on Akaashi’s couch, digging into a bag of crisps as the younger did research for his assignment.

“I’m busy right now.”

Kuroo shrugged, “I’m just saying, I know some ways of... you know, starting things smoothly.”

Akaashi put down his pen and sighed, turning around in his chair at the table to glare at his friend, “I really have to get this done, Kuroo. Can you stop?”

Kuroo smirked and pretended to zip up his mouth. Akaashi squinted and went back to his work.

After about five minutes, Kuroo started eating very loudly. Akaashi could hear the crunch of the crisps and it was getting increasingly annoying as the seconds passed. He tried blocking it out, but it was the only thing he could hear.

“Would you shut up?” he snapped, not even turning around.

“Is it bothering you?”

Akaashi whipped his head around, “Uh huh!”

Kuroo nodded and stopped chewing so loudly, but then he started talking again, “I saw Bokuto in the street the other day and-”

“Why are you so obsessed with this?!” Akaashi yelled, dropping his research entirely and turning fully round in his chair, glaring at Kuroo, “Why are you always mentioning Bokuto or our relationship?”

Kuroo’s eyes were wide, “Wha- Akaashi...”

“You’re always prying into our relationship! It’s not wanted, I don’t want you poking your nose in where it’s not wanted!” he snapped.

“Whoa, okay...” Kuroo said calmly, “I’m just trying to help-”

Akaashi was fuming, “I NEVER ASKED FOR YOUR HELP! I’VE NEVER ONCE TOLD YOU TO PRY, I DON’T WANT YOU TO HELP ME!”

Hurt flashed across Kuroo’s face, his own blood was beginning to boil, “I’m only trying to fix what’s happened. It's what friends do, they help other friends, pick them back up and I know you didn’t ask me to but it’s my job as your best friend.” He said sternly.

“WHY ARE YOU TREATING ME LIKE I CAN’T TAKE CARE OF MYSELF?!” Akaashi shouted, “I DON’T NEED YOU TO ‘PICK ME BACK UP’ OR WHATEVER, I’M CAPABLE OF DOING IT MYSELF!”

“I’M NOT SAYING YOU CAN’T TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!” Kuroo shot back, eyes narrowing dangerously, “ALL I SAID WAS THAT I’M HERE FOR YOU, TO HELP YOU WHEN YOU NEED HELP!”

Akaashi clenched his fists, “AND WHAT IF I DON’T WANT YOUR HELP? YOU’RE ALWAYS IN MY HEAD GOING ON ABOUT WHAT I CAN DO, WHAT I SHOULDN’T DO, YOU’RE NIT-PICKING AND IT’S SO FRUSTRATING!”

“I’M JUST-”

“DON’T YOU THINK THAT YOU OF ALL PEOPLE HAVE DONE ENOUGH?!”

Kuroo fell silent, his sharp features relaxing and there was definite pain hidden in his expression. Upon seeing that, Akaashi realised what he said, and he mentally cursed himself.

“Shit... Kuroo-”

“You’re right...” Kuroo mumbled, “I have done enough.”

Akaashi stood up from his chair at the same time Kuroo stood from his couch, “Kuroo-”

“Thanks for the crisps.” Kuroo said, balling up the packet and dropping it on the floor, before leaving, letting the door slam on the way out.

Akaashi’s fists were still clenched, but they relaxed as his arms hung lifelessly at his sides. Then he cried. His chest tightening like a vice, his airway seemingly closing, it hurt more than when he argued with Bokuto. The cries that shook his body were silent, but they were more powerful, tears staining his cheeks. Arguments with best friends always hurt more.

\---

Akaashi’s head was on Bokuto’s shoulder, the older rubbing his hand up and down his shoulder comfortingly, “I’m sorry for calling you over so suddenly.” Akaashi mumbled.

“It’s fine.” Bokuto reassured. He was still a little hesitant when Akaashi called him, but he knew that he had to support him, “Do you want to talk about it?”

Akaashi had long stopped crying, but his chest still ached, “I just keep on pushing the people I love away. I didn’t mean to yell at him but I just did and I don’t know why...”

“Kuroo?”

“He’s just trying to help. He always is, it’s one of his traits, being too kind and generous and I just shoved that in his face.” Akaashi pressed his face into Bokuto’s shoulder, gripping his shirt, “I just feel so bad for yelling at him like that.”

“I’m sure he’ll understand.” Bokuto said, “He’s your best friend, you’ve gone through a lot.”

They had gone through a lot. They have argued before but this time, for whatever reason, it hurt more. Akaashi had never seen hurt like he had on Kuroo’s face before, and it made his stomach drop just thinking about it.

The longer Akaashi leaned his head on Bokuto’s shoulder, the more tired he got. Everything that’s gone on is just far too tiring. He closed his eyes, letting sleep overcome him as he thought about what Kuroo must be going through.

\---

“Kuroo what’s wrong?”

No reply.

“Kuroo.”

Tsukishima was persistent. He’d get what he wanted. Kuroo knew that, “Me and Akaashi got into an argument, and I think it’s partly because of how I felt after Akaashi told me he’s not in love with me anymore.” He said, “I was just trying to help, you know?”

Tsukishima nodded, “But that’s a good thing, isn’t it? Him not being in love with you anymore?”

Kuroo bit his lip, “I thought it was, but I feel like crap. There’s like, a dull ache in my chest and it hurts.”

“You like him.”

“Tsukki-”

“It’s fine.” Tsukishima held up a hand, “I’ve had my fair share of heartbreaks and bad breakups and shit. You didn’t like him, never did, until after you saw how happy he was with somebody that wasn’t you. You weren’t used to him being with anybody else because you were the first person he was with when he came here. He relied on you, and now you’re jealous that he doesn’t need you anymore, that he’s found somebody else to rely on. Sound familiar?”

Kuroo shrugged, “I guess...”

“Well it’s true. I see the way you look at Akaashi now, and then I see the way you look at me.”

“Tsukki no! I do! I do like you!”

“I know.” Tsukishima replied, “Don’t feel bad, because I feel the same. Something between us isn’t working. You know, some things don’t work out, but it was fun whilst it lasted.”

“So is this a, uh- a breakup?”

Tsukishima looked to the ground, “I want to be with you, I want it work out between us, but you’re clearly not happy in this relationship anymore. I can be an asshole sometimes, but I’m not one to stand in the way of another guy’s happiness.”

Kuroo nodded, “Right.”

Suddenly, on impulse, Tsukishima leaned forward and caught Kuroo’s lips with his own, his hands made their way to the back of his neck and he pulled him into a sloppy but eager kiss. Kuroo was caught by surprise, but wasn’t put off, and he snaked his hands around Tsukishima’s neck and pressed harder against his lips.

Tsukishima ran his tongue across Kuroo’s bottom lip, and carefully slipped inside his mouth, brushing it against Kuroo’s own tongue. Kuroo gripped tighter on Tsukishima’s neck, his fingers dangerously close to leaving bruises, but he was just so... eager.

Kuroo pulled back for a moment, and looked deep into Tsukishima’s eyes, “I don’t want to break up with you.”

Tsukishima’s breath hitched, and he stared back into Kuroo’s eyes, his pupils were dilated and they were full of so many different emotions, “You don’t? I- I thought-”

“You’re the one I want to be with. And so what if _one_ thing isn’t working out, I’ve never been one to back away because of something I can get around. Breaking up with you is going to solve nothing, and just make me even more miserable because there is nothing I can do if Akaashi is in a relationship. He’s moved on, he’s independent and that’s a good thing, it’s selfish to want him to rely on me forever.” Kuroo replied, taking Tsukishima’s hands in his own, “And I _am_ happy in this relationship. I love spending time with you, and man, you are _hot!_ And there is nothing I want more than to be with you. You’re the person in my life now.”

Tsukishima huffed, “So this isn’t a break-up?”

Kuroo shook his head and pressed Tsukishima down further into the mattress, “No, it’s quite the opposite.” He said, and then reattached their lips.

Tsukishima pushed him back a little, “You need to think stuff over, and go back and talk to Akaashi.”

“I know.” Kuroo smiled.

\---

Akaashi was still asleep on Bokuto’s shoulder when his phone started ringing. Without wanting to disturb him, Bokuto leaned over to the table and picked it up. He frowned at the caller ID, but answered it anyway.

“Hello?”

_“Uh- is Akaashi there?”_

“Akaashi’s asleep right now; he’s really upset about what happened you know.” Bokuto replied.

Kuroo sighed on the other line, _“I feel like such a jerk for shouting back.”_ He said, _“Is there any way I can talk to him?”_

As if Akaashi heard that, he slowly opened his eyes and looked up at Bokuto. He furrowed his eyebrows and held out his hand.

Bokuto pressed his lips into a line and thought for a moment, before handing the phone over.

“Kuroo?” Akaashi asked, his voice sounding sleepy and groggy.

_“...Hey...”_

Akaashi inhaled sharply, “Kuroo I’m so sorry!”

_“Please, it’s okay... I’m sorry for overreacting and shouting at you as well.”_

“I shouldn’t have shouted in the first place, I know you’re only trying to help.”

Kuroo smiled softly, _“Yeah but I can be a bit overbearing sometimes, huh?”_ he laughed.

Akaashi copied his smile, “I suppose... Can we just forget it ever happened?”

 _“Of course.”_ Kuroo replied, more than happy to agree on that, _“Actually, Akaashi-”_

At the same time Akaashi glanced at the clock, and his eyes widened, “Shit is that the time? Kuroo I’m sorry but my deadline is soon, can I get back to you?”

Kuroo bit his tongue and swallowed his words. It was probably better to do that in person anyway, _“S-sure! Good luck with your assignment.”_ He hung up after that, not waiting for Akaashi’s reply which would be a ‘Thank-you’ anyway.

Akaashi put his phone back on the coffee table and sighed, “I’m happy I have such an understanding friend.” He said, “I honestly thought he’d be madder.”

Bokuto nodded, “I suppose, but it’s sorted now.”

“Yeah.” Akaashi turned his head and locked eyes with Bokuto. He felt like kissing him, but was he allowed to? They were dating, but everything just seemed out of alignment at the moment, and although it was going okay, he didn’t want to upset the balance.

But apparently he didn’t have to, because Bokuto was already leaning in, and a second later, they were kissing. A hand snaked into his hair, another round the back of his neck. He could stay there forever, but he pulled away, “I need to finish my assignment.” He said apologetically.

Bokuto nodded, “Y-yeah, of course. Go ahead.”

Akaashi stood up and headed over to his laptop, getting up the recent work that he’s done and continuing, but not before cursing himself. _Did I just upset the balance? Make conversation! Quick!_

“S-so when you find out whether or not you got onto the team?” he asked, barely glancing over his shoulder.

Bokuto searched his mind for an answer, “Uh- not too sure, sometime within the next couple of days, I’m guessing. There weren’t that many of us applying so it should be easy to decided I suppose.”

Akaashi nodded, “That’s good then, you have a greater chance of making it.”

“Hey hey- don’t jinx it!”

Akaashi smiled and added some finishing touches to his design, “Sorry, sorry... hey can you come here and see if this works?”

“Sure!”

After being told how great his design was, Akaashi got given a kiss on the cheek and the promise of a movie, and then he submitted it to Oikawa.

“So what movies are on?” he asked.

“There’s nothing tonight, but there are some good ones tomorrow night!” Bokuto said, scrolling through the movie listings on his phone.

“They aren’t scary are they?”

Bokuto scoffed, “Pfft, no!”

Akaashi raised an eyebrow, “They better not be.”

\---

(The next day)

“We are _not_ watching a horror movie.” Akaashi said, crossing his arms as he and Bokuto stared up at that night’s movie listings, “Absolutely not.”

“Why~” Bokuto sang, leaning over and bumping Akaashi with his shoulder, “You scared of horror movies?”

Bokuto meant it as a joke, it was just a little bit of teasing, but Akaashi still answered with, “Yes.”

“Wha- seriously?” Bokuto’s jaw dropped, “Even more reason to watch one then! You can cuddle up to me and squeeze my hand.”

Akaashi raised an eyebrow, ready to object, but Bokuto was already dragging him over to the ticket stand, rambling on about how Akaashi can hide behind his beefy arms or something.

When they sat in their seats, Akaashi seemed to be okay, he was a little nervous, but the movie they decided on (more like Bokuto decided on) wasn’t meant to be too scary. Bokuto was busy munching away at their popcorn to share when the movie started.

“Don’t forget to hold my hand.” He said, leaning over and whispering in Akaashi’s ear.

Akaashi fought the urge to elbow him in the stomach as the opening titles appeared on an eerie background. He didn’t like it already.

It was around the climax of the movie, and Akaashi hadn’t felt the need to hide behind anything or hold Bokuto’s hand yet, but to the latter’s disappointment. But it was when Bokuto felt his phone vibrate, indicating he had an incoming call, did Akaashi’s heart rate increase.

“I have to take this.” Bokuto said, getting up and brushing past Akaashi, thankful they were on the end of their row and close to the door.

“You can’t leave me!” Akaashi whispered, grabbing Bokuto’s shirt.

“I’m sorry!” Bokuto replied quietly, “This is a really important call.”

Akaashi pouted and let go of Bokuto’s shirt, letting him slip silently from the cinema. He forced himself to look back at the screen, but without Bokuto’s strong, warm and intimidating presence next to him, he felt incredibly vulnerable.

That was when it happened.

The whole movie had been pretty timid up until now. The protagonist was in an abandoned warehouse looking for his sister, when a fucking _jump scare_ had to occur. There had been minor ones during the first few scenes of the movie, but this one put the icing on the cake. Akaashi had never jumped so much in his life, and he swore he saw his life flash before his eyes as he let out a rather loud screech.

He was thankful he wasn’t the only one in the cinema who screamed, but his was definitely the loudest and most high-pitched, which was pretty embarrassing as a few eyes were on him. Damn Bokuto, what was taking him so long?

About 2 jump scares later, Bokuto still wasn’t back, so Akaashi gave up and went to go find him; he wasn’t enjoying the film that much anyway.

He stormed out of the cinema, thrusting his empty tub of popcorn into the bin; he didn’t get to eat much of it anyway. He saw Bokuto by the ticket stand, talking quickly into his phone. Akaashi glared over at him, before heading straight at him. He was not happy.

Bokuto caught him in the corner of his eye and said something else into the phone before hanging up, “Akaashi? What are you doing out here?”

Akaashi balled up his fists and started, lightly, hitting Bokuto’s chest to show how frustrated he was with him, “You just left me in there for God only knows how long!” he cried, “You know how I hate horror movies and you let me on _my own!_ There was a huge jump scare and I screamed and everybody looked at me and... It was the worst! Then I come out here and you’re _still_ talking on the phone!”

Bokuto blinked, “Akaa-”

“It was so scary! You had no idea how scared I was; never do that to me again!”

“Akaashi!” Bokuto said, grabbing his wrists to stop Akaashi from hitting him.

“What?” Akaashi snapped.

Bokuto smiled gently, “I got in.”

“Huh?”

“I got in!” He repeated.

“To the- to the team?”

Bokuto nodded. “Apparently Iwaizumi put in a good word for me or something!”

Akaashi smiled. He was still annoyed about being left to watch a horror movie on his own, but he was immensely happy for Bokuto. He almost forgot that Oikawa mentioned Iwaizumi went pro, I guess it pays to know somebody in the field. “Congratulations.”

Bokuto wrapped his arms around Akaashi and squeezed, “Thank-you!” he cheered, “And also... I’m sorry for leaving you; I promise I won’t do it again.”

“You’d better not.” Akaashi said, tilting his head up to look at him. He placed a kiss on his chin and smiled, “Now, what do you say we go home and celebrate you getting in?”

Bokuto’s eyes sparkled as he leaned in to give Akaashi a proper kiss, “I think that’s a great idea.”

They walked back to Akaashi’s apartment, because his was closer, with their hands linked. Akaashi would’ve preferred going back to Bokuto’s, because he preferred Bokuto’s apartment to his own.

“So do you want to hang out a big when we get there or just go straight into the bedroom?” Bokuto asked, swinging their arms.

Akaashi rolled his eyes, “Whatever you’re in the mood for when we get there.”

“Alright.” Bokuto replied, “How does celebratory sex sound?”

Akaashi laughed at the worried expression on Bokuto’s face, it was almost as if the older thought he went too far, “That...” he said, leaning closer, “Sounds like a great idea.”

When they got to the apartment complex, Bokuto was already eagerly pulling off Akaashi’s jacket, and by the time they were at Akaashi’s front door, he was down to his shirt, which was already being tugged over his head.

Akaashi fumbled around with the door handle, trying to get it open, at the same time as being pushed against it. When he managed to get it open, Bokuto pushed him into the room and his back hit the wall separating the entrance area from the rest of the apartment, and Bokuto kicked the door closed without even looking.

Akaashi’s hands were wrapped around Bokuto’s neck, pulling at his hair as he was being passionately kissed. Bokuto was getting a little impatient, so he tossed Akaashi’s shirt to the side and lifted his thighs up, enough for Akaashi to get the hint and wrap his legs around his waist so Bokuto could lift him up.

He carried him through to the living room, with his mouth fixed on his neck, leaving his mark which contrasted with his pale skin. Akaashi’s head was tipped backwards, with his eyes closed, but when he opened his eyes to make sure Bokuto wasn’t going to walk them into anything, he jumped so much Bokuto almost dropped him.

“Woah-woah, Akaashi- are you okay?” Bokuto asked adjusting his grip so he didn’t fall.

Akaashi didn’t respond, just stared at where the couches were. Bokuto followed his gaze, and as a result almost dropped him again.

Kuroo was stood there, with bright red cheeks and an awkward posture, “I- I am so sorry.”

Bokuto swore under his breath and gently lowered Akaashi to the ground. “What’s up, man?” he asked, scratching the back of his head. It was embarrassing for him too.

“I just wanted to talk to Akaashi for a sec. I’m really sorry for interrupting... this...” he gestured with his hands at the two of them.

Akaashi bit the inside of his cheek and turned to Bokuto, he put his hands around his face and gave him a small kiss on the lips, “Can you go wait in the bedroom please? I won’t be long.”

Bokuto kissed him again, “Sure.”

When Bokuto was in the bedroom, Akaashi picked up his shirt, which was thrown over a side table by the door, and put it back on. Kuroo was thankful; it would’ve been weird to have this conversation if he was shirtless.

“What did you want to talk to me about?”

“First I want to say sorry about... being here so unexpected and interrupting your- uh...” Kuroo started, but Akaashi cut him off.

“It’s fine.”

“It’s just I wasn’t sure if you’d be home or not, and I didn’t know if we still did that thing where we could let ourselves into each other’s apartments or not anymore so...”

“Kuroo I kind of have somewhere to be right now so could you hurry this up a little?”

Kuroo gaped a little, and then he nodded, “Of course!” he said, “Secondly, I want to apologise for what I said and how I acted when you told me you weren’t in love with me anymore.”

“...Oh.”

“Truth is, I was actually quite hurt by what you said, and then it confused me because I didn’t know why. I wasn’t sure how I felt about you and actually considered the possibility of liking you back.”

Akaashi’s eyes widened after hearing that, and he suddenly felt his mouth go dry. “Are you telling me you have feelings for me?”

“No.” Kuroo said, and immediately saw relief wash over Akaashi’s face. He wouldn’t deny that seeing that did sting a little, but he’d overcome that someday, “I spoke to Tsukishima afterwards about how I felt, and he made me see how stupid I was.”

“I don’t understand?” Akaashi raised an eyebrow.

“I was jealous of not being the one you depended on. You know, I was the first person you were with after coming here, and he told me that it was just because it was weird seeing you happy and relying on somebody else. Then, he told me that if I wasn’t happy in our relationship we could break up, but I didn’t want to break up with him, and made the decision that it would do nothing if I moped around, and I _do_ care about him a lot.”

Akaashi nodded, understanding some of it.

“Basically, I care about you so much to the point it hurt me to see you... I don’t know, leave me. We had a serious connection and then it started to fade and I didn’t know if I was happy with that, but now I am. I know you’re happy with Bokuto and I’m not going to get in the way of that, because for one, I am incredibly happy with Tsukishima.”

Akaashi moved across the room and pressed his body to Kuroo’s, his arms around him and his face in his shoulder, “Thank-you.”

Kuroo smiled gently and kissed the top of Akaashi’s head, “What are best friends for, huh?” he said, before grinning more and gently pushing Akaashi away, “Right well, I’ve cock-blocked enough for one night, so I’ll get going.”

Akaashi laughed and playfully punched his arm, “You’ll be fine, you know that, right?”

“Yeah.” Kuroo shrugged with a lop-sided grin, the same one which Akaashi remembered seeing one Monday morning as he watched Kuroo open the curtains from his bed. And at that moment, he knew that he, too, would be fine.

“I’ll see you soon.” Akaashi said, standing at the door to the bedroom as Kuroo made his way to the front door.

“See you.” Kuroo said, before silently leaving.

The other side of the door, Bokuto was quietly listening to their conversation. He was playing with his fingers, a habit he had picked up from Akaashi, as he went over what he heard. He opened the door slightly, and saw Akaashi still looking at the closed door, “You okay?”

Akaashi turned around and grabbed his hand, “Yeah. I’m great.” He said, allowing himself to be pulled into the room.

\---

Bokuto had Akaashi caged between his arms against the bedroom door, his tongue down his throat and knee between his thighs. Apparently he also wasn’t turned off by the fact last time they attempted this he was kneed somewhere down below.

Bokuto felt like he was on fire. Akaashi’s hands were trailing all over his body, fingers pressing in around his hips, sure to leave bruises. There was so much heat to the kiss, the swirl of tongues, the clash of teeth and despite it being rough, not one bit of it was sloppy or messy; they were perfectly in sync with each other. Bokuto pressed his knee a little higher, eliciting a gasp from Akaashi.

Bokuto broke the kiss but immediately latched onto Akaashi’s throat, kissing a line up from his collarbones to his ear and back again, and then pausing half way to suck a nice purple bruise into the skin. Akaashi’s toes curled at the feeling, having Bokuto’s teeth graze gently over him gave him goose-bumps.

“You’re so hot Akaashi.” Bokuto murmured against his neck, placing a sweet kiss to the fresh bruise.

“Uh-huh.” Akaashi breathed, bringing Bokuto’s face back up for another kiss. He was getting ever so slightly impatient.

Bokuto seemed to get the message to hurry it up a little, and grabbed Akaashi’s hips, he quickly lifted up and as if it was a reflex, Akaashi wrapped his legs around Bokuto’s waist. Bokuto kicked open the door and Akaashi let himself be carried over to the bed and thrown down onto the mattress.

Bokuto quickly stripped himself of his shirt, and started working on Akaashi’s. After tossing it to the side, he placed a trail of kisses from his sternum to his navel. Occasionally sucking or biting or just looking up at Akaashi as he gently sunk his teeth into the skin of his stomach made Akaashi’s eyes roll back.

He was panting, because just the sheer intensity of this was getting too much to handle. He’s obviously had sex before, but this was on another level. Sex with Kuroo had been extraordinary because the guy was just a beast, but just making out with Bokuto _,_ it was... was absolutely mind-blowing! He really didn’t have the chance to appreciate it the first time they did it.

Akaashi hardly realised Bokuto had unzipped his jeans and was working him out of his boxers because he was so focused on the way his lips closed around the sensitive skin at his lower abdomen.

Bokuto lifted Akaashi’s hips and tugged his boxers down to his knees, then all the way off. Akaashi just about heard Bokuto’s deep voice, “Akaashi.”

“Hmm.” He hummed, in complete euphoria.

“Akaashi...” Bokuto repeated, almost as a song.

Akaashi’s eyes were closed, and he was completely unaware that he was naked, just completely naked and lying on the bed displaying him like he was in a shop window. Bokuto smiled down at him, he was so fucking beautiful. Bokuto figured that he wouldn’t answer to his name anymore, so he leaned forward carefully and blew gently against Akaashi’s dick.

That got his attention. Akaashi’s eyes shot open and he sat up so quickly Bokuto was worried he’d get whiplash. The sudden cool air on something burning hot was a weird sensation, but it was awfully satisfying at the same time. Akaashi’s eyes widened when he realised his clothing, or lack thereof. He looked up at Bokuto and let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “When did you do that?”

“When you were practically coming from me giving you some pretty damn impressive hickeys.”

Akaashi frowned and looked down at himself, eyes widening once more at how purple his body was. Bokuto was right, it was damn impressive. He looked back up at Bokuto and smirked, “Well it was pretty great.”

Bokuto bit his lip as he smiled, “You’re so gorgeous; I’m jealous.”

“Shut up.” Akaashi said, reaching forward and putting a hand on the back of his neck and tugged him back down, “Are you going to fuck me or what?”

\---

Whatever sign he thought there was from that time he kneed Bokuto in the dick, it was complete superstitious bullshit, and Akaashi laid on the bed wondering why the fuck he hadn’t done this sooner. Actually, it was a little hard to really concentrate on something like that when you’re being pinned to the bed by 78kg of toned muscle and sexiness and being pounded into like you’re a slab of meat.

Akaashi was moaning obscenities and Bokuto was biting his lip from swearing explicitly. Yeah, this was better than with Kuroo, Akaashi decided; there was just so much passion and although he wasn’t at the stage of loving Bokuto, he could tell that Bokuto’s thrusts and looks and kisses were full of love.

Akaashi squeezed his eyes closed as he climaxed, Bokuto’s name rolling off his tongue, and a couple minutes later Bokuto was finished too, and pulled out to clean up. After being suitably clean, Bokuto climbed back onto the bed and crawled over to Akaashi, “That was...”

“Fucking awesome.” Akaashi breathed.

Bokuto huffed a laugh and leaned down to kiss him, “I love you.”

Akaashi lifted his head a little to kiss him again, he mumbled against his lips, “You too.”

“Hey hey... do you wanna make me a snack? I’m kinda hungry.”

Akaashi frowned at him, “Absolutely not.”

“It’s cool.” Bokuto said, rolling over to lie down and pull Akaashi close to his chest. They were both still naked, but the covers were covering their lower halves, Akaashi’s chest was sporting a nice array of purple bruises, and Bokuto’s shoulders were displaying nicely shaped bite marks. “Like I said, I’m a very patient man.”

“Except when you’re in bed.” Akaashi snorted, placing his hand on Bokuto’s strong abs, his fingers falling nicely into the grooves.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Bokuto whined, “You were eager to get a little action too you know!”

Akaashi smiled and closed his eyes. He could get used to this very easily.

\---

It had been a rollercoaster of emotions. God it had been a _train wreck!_ If Akaashi had it his way, honestly, he’d have skipped all the drama and just got to the point straight away, but if he was asked if he’d do it all over again for the same result. He’d say yes.

Kuroo would be fine, Akaashi would be fine, and hell; even Bokuto would be fine. It wasn’t going to be a walk in the park, but they were all okay with that. All three of them have gone through a lot in the space of a year, and they weren’t going to stop overcoming things now.

It was a lesson that Akaashi learned, as he went through stages of love, denial, heartbreak and drunken mistakes, that things _do_ get better. And he should know; he’s the one who just had to hold onto the headboard for dear life as his energy was literally being fucked out of him by the person he loves the most in this world.

It all started from an understanding he had with his best friend, they were fuck-buddies, a stress reliever, but they were just _friends._

It goes to show that in any situation, whether it be a bad breakup or an argument with a significant other, there will always, undoubtedly, be benefits.

_Fin._

**Epilogue**

“Akaashi check it out!” Bokuto said, making his way through the boxes in the living room, “They finally got me my team jacket with my name on! See! See!”

Akaashi looked up from the CDs he was stacking into a box and smiled, “That’s great, it looks awesome. Can you help me pack this stuff up now, please?”

Bokuto pouted. Akaashi had asked him to help pack 5 times now, and he found a way to put it off every time. First it was coming up with a distraction, like the cat which was sitting on their windowsill outside, or the second time he asked and Bokuto conveniently got a phone call from Kuroo which he just had to take. Right now though, he couldn’t think of any excuses to get him out of helping, and he really hated packing.

It was Bokuto’s fault anyway; he was the one to asked Akaashi to move in with him one hot summer day whilst they were sitting outside a small cafe for lunch. Akaashi wasn’t expecting it and spat his drink all over the table. After a big discussion, they decided on getting a place together, a fresh start, considering Akaashi didn’t really like his apartment anymore, and Bokuto’s was a little further away from the rest of the city than a place which he found in the paper. It was a 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom place on the second floor of a complex. It had a little balcony over the apartment gardens and there were lots of friendly people. They also allowed pets, which Bokuto was excited about, because he really wanted to get a dog. Akaashi just shook his head at that, saying neither of them had the time to be looking after a dog.

The thing that both of them were looking forward to the most was probably waking up next to each other every morning, not that they didn’t do that quite a lot anyway, but this time the apartment would have both their names on. Akaashi would wake up to the smell of coffee and bacon and eggs, and Bokuto would be lulled to sleep every night with Akaashi’s fingers in his hair. Despite looking forward to spending the rest of their lives together, Bokuto was particularly looking forward to the housewarming party which according to him was compulsory. Akaashi didn’t really have anything against the idea; he just hoped that their newly decorated apartment wouldn’t get trashed one week after moving in.

Kuroo had immediately agreed a housewarming party was an absolute must, and the two of them started planning it one afternoon whilst Akaashi was, yet again, packing on his own. Apparently, Bokuto had already packed up his apartment, which Akaashi didn’t believe until he saw evidence. But there it was, as he stood in the doorway of Bokuto’s apartment, he was completely shocked to see that the place was spotless, ready for a new owner to move in.

Bokuto had sold most of his furniture, as the two of them decided to get most of their things together, including a new bed, couch, TV set etc. Bokuto only packed the things he 100% knew he would need, like clothes, and sentimental stuff, and of course, his owl stuff. Akaashi, on the other hand, was a little less decisive when it came to what he should keep and what he should throw out, which is one of the reasons he needed Bokuto’s help.

“Well?” Akaashi raised an eyebrow, “Are you going to help me or what?”

 _Crap._ Bokuto thought. He was out of ideas. “I suppose.” He sighed, picking up one of the boxes and moving to the bookshelf, “You know you have way too much stuff, why are you keeping all of it?”

Akaashi brushed some dust off of some old books and put them in the box Bokuto had, “You never know, I may need it one day.”

Bokuto retrieved the book he put in there and raised an eyebrow, “You’re going to need a book called _30 Ways to Peel a Potato?”_

Akaashi shot him a look, “It may come in handy when you want me to make a roast dinner.” He snapped.

Bokuto grinned, “You don’t need it.” he said, “I’m tossing it.”

Akaashi lacked the energy to put up a fight, but he didn’t really care about that particular book, plus Bokuto had a good point.

After about 2 hours of complaining about sore backs, too much dust and whether or not something should be thrown out, Akaashi’s apartment was packed up and ready to be moved. He wasn’t keeping any of his furniture either and he was selling some of his stuff to colleagues at work or friends he knew.

“The moving van is here.” Bokuto said, popping his head round the corner of Akaashi’s door, “You ready?”

Akaashi stood up and looked around his apartment. So much had gone on in that place, things he’d never forget. He smiled at the memories and turned to face his boyfriend, “Yeah.”

Bokuto put an arm around him as they headed out of the apartment to let the movers start packing up things. “We don’t have to be at the new place for another 3 hours, want to get something to eat?”

Akaashi nodded and leaned his head on Bokuto’s shoulder, “Sounds good.”

\---

“So who did you invite to this housewarming party tomorrow?” Akaashi asked, unlocking the door to their first apartment together. It was a nice open space, with a lot to work with. They weren’t going to do a lot of decorating before the party, just so things were out the way.

“Anyone, I guess. Colleagues and friends...”

“What about your parents? They live in the area, right?”

Bokuto stilled, he slipped out of his shoes and turned to face Akaashi, “I didn’t. I didn’t think it would be a good idea.”

Akaashi looked up from his phone, “Huh? Why not?”

“I uh-” Bokuto hesitated, “I wasn’t going to bring this up until later but... Remember on our very first date I told you I didn’t really speak to them that much?”

“...Yeah?” Akaashi asked, pocketing his phone so Bokuto could have his full attention.

“Well I don’t speak to them at all. I haven’t in about 4 years.”

Akaashi’s eyes widened, “Why?”

Bokuto scratched the back of his head, “They tried to get in contact for the first year, and still occasionally try and call me, but I never respond.” He said, “When I was 21 I told them I was gay.”

Oh.

Akaashi knew where this was headed.

“I’m not going to sugar coat it, they took it pretty badly. My Mum cried over not having any grandchildren, and my Dad just looked at me with such disappointment. It wasn’t like they disapproved, or are the type of people to disown somebody because of it, but they started treating me differently, like they were acting weirdly around me as if they were worried about offending me or something, and in the end I ended up calling them out on it and we got into a big argument, and I left.”

“I-I’m so sorry.” Akaashi said quietly.

Bokuto laughed, “Why? It’s _my_ fault. I blocked _them_ out, they tried getting in contact with me and I didn’t let them.”

“Still I-” Akaashi stuttered, “It sucks, having to go through that, no matter the circumstances.”

Bokuto shrugged, “I guess.” He said, making his way across the floor to the kitchen area, helping himself to a drink, thankful that he stocked it already. “What about you, when did you tell your parents?”

“Uh-”

“Shit...” Bokuto muttered, “I’m sorry I-”

Akaashi waved a hand, “Its fine. I actually never got the chance to tell them. Rika was the first person I told when I found out, she was only 10 at the time, but seemed to understand and was never any different towards me. That was 7 years ago, which was also when my parents died. I told my grandparents, and they were shocked at first, but were totally cool with it, at the time my parents were out, so I waited for them to return so I could tell them... But they never returned.”

Suddenly Bokuto’s arms were surrounding him, a hand on the back of his head. He didn’t say anything, but Akaashi knew anyway. Unspoken words which fell so easily between them now. _I love you._

\---

“Kuroo!” Bokuto yelled at he opened the door.

“The one and only!” Kuroo yelled back, giving Bokuto a high-five. He walked into the apartment, Tsukishima in tow, and looked excitedly around the apartment. “This is so cool!”

Akaashi got up from the couch to go and greet them. He gave Tsukishima a friendly smile, and Kuroo walked over to him and gave him a hug. “You alright?” Akaashi asked.

Kuroo laughed and pulled away, giving Akaashi a quick kiss on the cheek, “Mmm, just checking out this awesome new place!”

“That’s the point of a housewarming party, dumbass.” Tsukishima deadpanned, and Bokuto burst out laughing.

“Whatever.” Kuroo pouted, grabbing Tsukishima’s hand and leading him over to where the drinks were laid out.

Bokuto slid over to where Akaashi was standing, happy that they had wooden floors so he could literally slide around in socks, “I invited my team, if that’s okay...” he said quietly.

Akaashi’s eyebrows shot up, “All of them?”

“Kinda...”

“It’s okay.” Akaashi sighed, “As long as they’re all good guys.”

Bokuto grinned, “Oh yeah, they’re great!”

Soon enough, the whole Japanese National Volleyball Team was spread around Akaashi’s living room. He only knew Iwaizumi from the lot of them, aside from Bokuto, of course. The place was buzzing with energy and laughter. There were a lot of people there, Oikawa, Daichi and Suga, Konoha, and a few other colleagues, like Komi, from another floor. Oikawa, as usual, was bragging about how spectacular he and Iwaizumi’s wedding would be to the team. Iwaizumi just stood next to him giving apologetic looks to his team.

Akaashi was actually looking forward to the wedding, it was meant to be huge, if what Oikawa was saying was true. It wasn’t going to be a traditional Japanese wedding; it was going to be much more... western. That was what Oikawa wanted, anyway. The location they had chosen was gorgeous, a beach on the island of Okinawa, because Oikawa said it spelt his name and that meant it was meant to be. Iwaizumi only agreed because the beach was really beautiful.

All of the guests, including the whole volleyball team and the majority of people from the office, would be there, and it was going to be amazing. They had fireworks planned for the night time, so they could all sit on the beach after the sunset and watch them go off. Their honeymoon was going to be in Europe, Oikawa really wanted to go to Milan in Italy for some unknown reason, but he promised to bring back some awesome souvenirs.

\---

“Aren’t we all a little old for spin the bottle?” Iwaizumi asked, but he sat in the circle anyway.

“You may be old, Iwa-chan, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have fun.” Oikawa said, setting up the bottle in the middle of the group. There wasn’t that many of them playing, but a good enough number. Bokuto and Akaashi were playing, as were Oikawa, Iwaizumi, Suga, Daichi, Kuroo, Komi and Konoha was dragged into it by Yukie. A few of the volleyball players joined in as well for the hell of it. Kuroo tried to get Tsukishima to play, but he refused by kicking Kuroo away from him.

“I’m only a month older than you, dumbass.” Iwaizumi retorted, but Oikawa threw him a peace sign.

“Who’s first?!” Kuroo said, looking round the circle.

“I’ll go!” Yukie said, leaning forwards and spinning the empty beer bottle. It landed on one of the players, who turned a bright red colour.

“Oi-” Konoha started, “You better not try anything shifty with her.” He eyed the player, who actually looked intimidated considering he was quite a bit taller, and bulkier than Konoha.

Yukie sighed, “Relax and have some fun, babe.” She said, wiggling her eyebrows at the player.

Konoha rolled his eyes, and purposefully looked away as his girlfriend casually kissed one of the people on the national team. No biggie.

He then spun the bottle, landing on one of his teammates, who didn’t looked fazed at all by it landing on him.

A couple of rounds went by before Kuroo got bored, “How about we make this interesting?”

Eyebrows shot up around the circle, “How, exactly?” Suga asked, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. His kiss with one of the teammates had been especially... sloppy, much to Daichi’s disapproval.

Kuroo stood up and retrieved a pen and piece of paper. “I’ll write down a place on the body, tear up the paper and muddle it up, then when you spin the bottle you choose one and wherever it says, you have to give that person a hickey.”

“You know what? I’m not drunk enough for this.” Yukie said, standing up and getting another beer. Konoha looked at her with side eyes when she sat back down again.

“Is everyone cool with that?” Kuroo asked.

“Although I’m not playing.” Tsukishima started, “As far as I’m aware, the majority of you guys are in relationships you’d rather not risk jeopardising.”

It was true. Daichi and Suga were married, Iwaizumi and Oikawa were engaged, Yukie and Konoha were dating, so were Bokuto and Akaashi, Kuroo was with Tsukishima himself, and a few people on the volleyball team had girlfriends back at home.

“Yes, but it’s not like it’s serious. It’s a party game.” Kuroo pointed out.

“For teenagers.”

“Look babe.” Kuroo put his hands up, “If you want control over who I give hickeys to why don’t you just join in?”

Tsukishima raised an eyebrow, “I’ll pass.” He deadpanned.

Kuroo smirked, “Alright then! Now there aren’t any more objections, let’s get this rolling!”

\---

Akaashi’s fingers traced over a bruise on Bokuto’s chest, smiling to himself, “You know I’m pretty proud of this one.”

Bokuto grinned, “Hmm, lucky the bottle landed on me then.”

“Yup!” Akaashi replied.

They were tucked up in bed, and by bed it was more like a blow up mattress on the floor because their new bed hadn’t arrived yet. All the guests were long gone, some of them sporting multiple different shaped hickeys and bruises, but nonetheless drunkenly happy.

“Although about this one...” Bokuto said, tapping a purple mark on Akaashi’s shoulder, “I’m not entirely happy about.”

Akaashi raised his eyebrows, “What? Because it’s from Kuroo?”

“No!” Bokuto denied, because for once, it really wasn’t, “Just it looks impressive, and it sucks I can’t give hickeys which look like that.”

“I beg to differ.” Akaashi replied, “I’ve got a pretty impressive hickey, one you have me two nights ago, just below my waistband.”

Bokuto’s face was blank for a moment before he broke out in a grin, “Yeah that one was the best.”

Akaashi laughed and poked his nose, “You just wanted to bring that up again.”

“Well it was pretty good, you have to admit!” Bokuto bragged.

“Yeah...” the younger agreed, snuggling up to Bokuto, “Tonight was fun. Well done.”

“It was.” Bokuto said, holding Akaashi closer to him, “And I can’t wait to wake up tomorrow morning.”

 _I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you,_ “Me neither.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK-YOU SO SO SO MUCH FOR READING! I really hope that you guys liked it, and as always your feedback is lovely and greatly appreciated! If you have ideas you want to put forward about things you want to me write, please let me know! 
> 
> I can't express how happy I am with the comments and response I got for this story, and it encouraged me to keep writing so you can expect more from me in the future! 
> 
> Thank-you all so much, I love you all <3
> 
> (also I know some of you wanted a chapter with the Iwaoi wedding, so I'm considering doing a little side story featuring that; feel free to give any ideas for it as well!)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! Thanks for reading, it means a lot! Please check out my other stories if you want, and kudos, comments etc are always appreciated! Let me know what you think!   
> Also if there are any mistakes please let me know, unfortunately no matter how many times I re-read things I always miss something.


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